Needed You Always
by Paceismyhero
Summary: Starting at the flashback that spurned the Need You Now duet, showing the progression from practicing to the duet to the big game and beyond, with very different results. Rated M for later, and maybe Puck's mouth at the beginning. Enjoy ... and review!
1. Jealousy

**Author's Note:** I know I'm late to the game, but I've been wanting to write this story ever since the Super Bowl episode. I just couldn't find the time until now, and now the thing is writing itself so don't worry about waiting a long time between updates! I think it is going to end up being either 5 or 6 parts. I'm really excited about this because I'm sort of in love with it, but please let me know what you guys think. I'll finish it regardless, but it's always nice to hear what other people think about what you write. And, lastly, thanks to Jann for giving me the extra (strong) shove (off the cliff) to not abandon this and to post it. You rock my world. ;)

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><p>Rachel Berry yanked the choir room door open, her arms swinging by her sides as she spoke, "I need you to do this number with me to make Finn jealous."<p>

Puck rose slowly from the piano as she approached, his mouth twitching into a smile while his eyes widened. It was the first day back from winter break and they'd gone the entire two weeks without speaking, but apparently Rachel wasn't wallowing in self pity. Honestly, it didn't sound like her and it shouldn't have surprised him that she spent the vacation planning how to mend her abruptly broken love life. He just hoped deep down she'd realize Finn wasn't worth it.

"My break was alright. Thanks for askin'."

Rachel's smile faltered, her hands still on her hips but her arms losing some of their tension. Her eyes fell down in embarrassment, lifting back up slowly and evaluating him. She'd spent all break trying to convince herself that _he_ was the reason she was in this mess to begin with, but setting eyes on him again she knew that wasn't true. Her heart had been hurting long before her and Finn's official break up, and Noah had been the only one to offer any sort of relief. He'd reached out as a friend and maybe something more, but that was always the issue between the two of them.

"Good morning, Noah." Rachel sighed, moving her hands to rest on top of the piano. "What are you doing?"

"Apparently helpin' you with a song," he grumbled, taking a seat back on the bench. He toyed with a few keys, his eyes eventually drifting back up. "But I ain't doin' no showtune bullshit. So don't even ask."

"I-I … I was actually thinking of something much more suited to not just your vocal range but personality," she faltered momentarily, almost forgetting the pace of holding a conversation with him. "Although the artists are not Jewish."

"Strike one."

"No, I think you'll be quite pleased with my selection." Rachel nodded, as if the decision had already been made, swiftly moving from the head of the piano to sit alongside Puck on the bench. Out of nowhere, she produced sheet music and placed it on the small ledge so it would stand upright.

"Strike two," he muttered, reading over the artist and title.

"Don't be silly, Noah. The large belt buckles, the NASCAR, the incorrect but endearing way you refuse to pronounce the 'g' at the ends of words." He scoffed. "Country is right up your alley."

"What if I said no?"

"What?"

He smiled, wondering if was actually the first time someone might have said that to her. "What if I said no? I spent all break gettin' back on Finn's good side, and you want me to just throw it all down the shitter for some bitch ass country song?"

"Noah …" Rachel found her voice, but it faltered. With her eyes focused on the white of the piano keys, she took a few even breaths to collect herself and then looked back over at him. "I would completely understand if you didn't want to help me out. I was just … hoping you would. As _my_ friend."

His eyes softened at her tone of voice, recognizing it well. She always used it when she mentioned their friendship, almost whispering about it like it was meant to be kept a secret. And he knew why, sure. Their breakup scene on the bleachers would not go down as one of Puck's finer moments, and he wished he could at least take back what he said to her before stalking away. At the same time, though, he was glad that ship sailed away so fast. It was hard to believe it was only a year ago, but they just weren't ready for each other then.

"I've got some conditions, Berry," he said, bypassing the mushy crap and getting right to the point. Rachel had basically crumbled inside herself, her entire form slouching. She was already so tiny that it seemed impossible that she could be any smaller, but just the thought pushed Puck right into his hero complex. Time to save the damsel in distress. "Number One, we'll rehearse at my house. Your room is so damn pink I had to get my eyes checked afterward."

She smiled, nodding her head. "Number two?"

"Not until after lunch."

"Noah!" Rachel's nose scrunched up in disgust, both her arms lifting to shove him. Their laughter echoed in the room, Rachel eventually letting out a fast breath and rolling her eyes. "_Next_?"

"If Finn asks me what's goin' on, I ain't gonna lie." He shrugged, thinking that didn't sound too badass. "And I'm blamin' you."

"Fair enough." Rachel's smile faltered at the sound of Finn's name, her heart constricting slightly. "Anything else?"

Puck ran his eyes over Rachel's form one more time (as if the memory of her wasn't etched in his mind already). "This isn't a condition, but … you should wear dresses more."

Rachel furrowed her eyebrows, her head stuttering down to take in her outfit. She was wearing one of the new dresses her daddy had bought for her on one of his business trips to New York. Sure it was only January in Ohio and a sleeveless dress was not exactly the most appropriate attire, but it was too beautiful to be left alone on a hanger in her closet. The ruffles accentuated her frame perfectly and the plum color went well with her hair and complexion.

"I would think you of all people would prefer the skirts. This dress almost hits my knees."

"I _am_ a legs man," he commented offhandedly, skimming her frame again but this time taking more time on the lower half. "But you look good."

"Thanks," she answered slowly, eventually. This wasn't exactly how she expected this conversation to go. In fact, she figured there would be a lot more whining and blackmailing involved. She was suddenly uncomfortable. "Anyway, I've already talked to Mr. Riley about getting a few of the band kids to help us out when we need to, but I think if you can just learn to play the song on your guitar we'll be ready to begin preparing the finer intricacies of our duet tomorrow after school."

"And what exactly will you be doin' while I'm bustin' my ass learnin' an entire song overnight?"

"Well someone will need to arrange the song to compliment our voices. You consistently refuse to listen to my instructions regarding the high B note and because of that I will have to spend countless hours playing with the ranges."

"A simple 'nothing' would have sufficed, Rach." Puck rolled his eyes, swinging his legs to the left and then standing. His backpack was propped up against the side of the piano, and he grabbed the sheet music Rachel had brought and shoved the papers inside. Zipping it back up, he grabbed one of the straps and slung it over his shoulder. "See you in glee."

"What about English?" She questioned quickly, trying to distract her inner monologue from wondering when he had started calling her 'Rach'. "Sixth period?"

"Right." Puck sighed, his eyes closing briefly as he tried to bring his schedule to the forefront of his mind. He promised his mom that he'd try to do better in school this year. It was a promise he made every year – usually preceding a conversation where his mother would let him drink champagne on New Year's if he made it his resolution – but this time he sort of didn't want to break it. "It's been awhile."

"Mrs. Lawson likes you," she commented absently, her fingers releasing the hem of her dress to stroke the piano keys lightly. "I'm sure you'll catch up in no time."

"Ya think?" He asked doubtfully.

"Sure," she answered without hesitation, her smile as sincere as they come. "Despite what you might want others to believe, you happen to be very intelligent, Noah. If you didn't spend your nights and weekends in a complete state of debauchery fueled by drugs and alcohol, you might actually make something of yourself."

She didn't even take a breath between the two statements, the backhanded compliment flying out of her mouth without any warning or apology. Most of the time she didn't even know what she was saying could be hurtful until it was already too late, but even then she rarely felt bad. No reason to get upset about the truth, she'd said one time. And that was true, as were most of her observations – and certainly the one just now.

"Want to walk me to class like my mother, Berry?"

He saw her roll her eyes from his spot by the door frame, his head turning toward the hallway for a moment. The school was bustling with back-from-break gossip, everyone wearing new clothes they got for Christmas or talking about all the sweet shit Santa brought them. Seriously? Sometimes being a Jew sucked monkey balls.

"You comin' or what?"

"No, thank you."

"Wha-" Puck knitted his eyebrows together, looking at her full on now. "Is the perfect Rachel Berry gonna to be late for her first class?"

"No," she huffed out. "I just don't want to be early. That's all."

That wasn't all. He could tell. So he waited. He leaned against the door frame and stared, waiting for her break and tell him why she _really_ wasn't leaving for first period. He didn't know his own schedule so clearly he didn't know hers. But then again Puck doubted it had anything to do with the subject or even the teacher. Everyone expect that ex-glee director she had canned seemed to adore Rachel. You know, when she wasn't talking.

She sighed. "It's nothing." He scowled. "It's just that Jacob is in that class." His scowl deepened. "As you can imagine, word of my breakup with Finn spread rather quickly and none was more eager to learn of it than he."

Puck clenched his fist over the thin strap of his backpack, hearing his knuckles crack. He'd heard about what happened during the whole Britney Spears blackout they all went through, and that shit seriously wasn't going down. Finn might not have done anything to that snot-nosed dweeb, but Puck was going to make him sorry he even _thought_ about Rachel like that.

"Let me walk you to your class." He took a step back inside the choir room, extending his elbow out in invitation for her to curl her arm around his. Most couples held hands or whatever, but they never did. Not that they were a couple. Shit.

"That isn't necessary, Noah."

"Consider it another condition." He smirked, watching her sigh before conceding to his wishes. "And I actually have another."

"You know, I'm sure Artie would be able to pull off the male lead role just as well," she said while stopping at her locker. She deftly turned the dial to input the correct combination, the metal door swinging open and closed so fast that Puck wasn't sure how she managed to grab her bag.

"Singin' with Wheels isn't going to make Finn jealous."

Rachel nearly tripped over herself, his words hitting her harder than the student who consequently crashed into her when she stopped in the middle of the hallway. Puck was right. She'd come to him specifically not because of his vocal talent or even his ability to play the guitar. She targeted him because seeing Rachel with Puck would make Finn see red. It didn't matter if the two had supposedly patched things up or not. There was just something about Puck that made you have to react.

"Fine," she blew out a heavy breath, sliding the shoulder strap of her bag over her body so it crossed diagonally over her chest. She re-hooked her arm around his, her fingers splaying over his bicep as the two walked in sync toward her class. "What's the other condition?"

"You. Me. This weekend." He wiggled his eyebrows at her, causing her to giggle in spite of herself. Had it been anyone else, she would have slapped them. Fortunately, she could tell when Puck was joking. "Shit's gettin' crazy at casa de Puckerman what with ma's two jobs and Sarah suddenly becoming a joiner. I need my own car, and I found one, but it's all the way up in Toledo."

"Why can't you get a car here?"

"Because Ma only spotted me a couple hundred and the rest is out of pocket." He looked at her like she was stupid. Seriously? Not everyone was spoiled by two rich dads who loved nothing more than doting on their only daughter. "I barely have any coin leftover from last summer's pool cleanin' business, and I totally got laid off from Sheets-n-Things."

"You got fired, Noah. You stopped going to work."

"Oh, right." Puck frowned, forgetting he'd told her that. "The point is, I scored a sweet deal from this guy and he said I can pick it up Saturday." He could tell he hadn't quite convinced her yet, and considering they were nearing the classroom, he decided to turn the dial to high. "I was just going to hitchhike and cross my fingers, but …"

"Oh, fine," she pouted, releasing him from his hold and switching her backpack to the other hand. "And now I'm here safely. So, you can go."

"Sure." He squared his shoulders, his posture straightening as he looked past her and into the room. He couldn't see Jacob, and he couldn't help but hope the nerd transferred.

"Rachel Berry." The voice came out of nowhere, Jacob clearly in the classroom even though he wasn't visible yet. "I hope you don't think _not_ wearing a bra will make me stop asking to see it …" He trailed off, his voice hitching when Puck came into view.

"Beat it, four eyes," he growled, intimidating the smaller boy with his stature as he stepped closer to Jacob while re-securing Rachel in his hold. "Or you'll be sorry."

Jacob squeaked in response, nodding his head erratically before moving back into the room. He sat at his desk nervously, scooting the seat further away from Rachel's spot just to be on the safe side. Rachel moved out of Jacob's line of vision, looking up at Puck with a smile that quickly faded when she saw the fire in his eyes. She used the pad of her thumb to gently caress the smooth skin of his arm, waiting until she felt some of the tension release from his muscles.

"Be cool, Puck. Be nice." She grinned at the mantra, remembering when he'd confided in her about his reputation. His arm flexed underneath her hand, and she inhaled sharply, looking down at it and then back up at him questionably. The anger had subsided from the brown orbs, but there was something else floating within the depths that she couldn't quite put her finger on. But it was … powerful.

"I'll try to avoid the fire extinguishers," he remarked, screwing back on his standard ambivalent expression while untangling himself from her grip. He needed to get away. "See you in glee."

"Sixth period, Noah."

He stopped his retreat, his jaw clenching as her voice surrounded him. Much like what seemed to happen to him when he was bullying the school nerds, Puck almost blacked out when he was with Rachel. It was like everything before and after didn't matter, and it was just the two of them in whatever situation they were in at that precise moment. She didn't care that he had gone to juvie or swore like a sailor. And he barely noticed the vast amount of words she spoke anymore, usually because he learned how to tune her out. No matter what, though, it still felt like eventually he opened his eyes and wondered how he got there.

Not that he wanted to get there again, right?

"Right."


	2. Practice Makes Perfect

**Author's Note:** So I'm plugging away on this story and just about finished, so the updates should be rather steady. I can't thank you all enough for reading, and particularly those reviewing. No one could love this story as much as I do, but I really like hearing what you guys think. So, please, keep it coming. I live off reviews, for real. :)

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><p>Puck sighed heavily, seriously wishing one of his guitar strings would snap off and hit him in the eye just so he'd have a valid excuse to leave. Rachel had switched gears from willing duet partner to uptight slave driver about ten minutes ago, and it hadn't been going well since. She kept suddenly stopping and glowering at him before shouting, "From the top!" and starting all over again. He'd played the beginnings of the damn song so many times that he figured he could be a freaking understudy for the actual guitarist.<p>

"Berry, can we please stop for just five damn minutes?" He finally asked, exhaustion in his tone and evident in his posture. "My fingers are cramping up."

Rachel huffed out a breath and placed her hands on her hips. First he interrupts her mid-verse, and then he has the audacity to make up some lame excuse to take a break? She knew it was a lie because he acted the same way whenever she would try to help him with his homework (something he was starting to do more now, which meant she would probably have to help more soon, too). It wasn't like he couldn't do it on his own. He was more than capable, smarter than he gave himself credit for, but he had the attention span of a goldfish.

"Noah …" He looked up from his hands with such a pathetic stare that she couldn't help but sigh and relent. "Fine. _Five _minutes."

Rachel shifted her weight from one foot to the other, looking around the room absently. They'd agreed to rehearse the duet at his house, and she had been more than happy to oblige. They had a history of … losing focus … when they were in her room, and perhaps a change of venue was exactly what they needed. In this space, with his bed unmade and several items tossed carelessly on the floor, she could concentrate on the song. She could listen to his voice and the guitar instead of the sound of her walls whispering about the last time Puck had been in her room. And how amazing it had felt.

"Take a load off, B. I'm getting a Band-Aid." He was up off the bed and out of the room before she could even feel bad about making him bleed or blister. Puck had learned the entire song in exactly one night, and they had practiced yesterday, too. Maybe she did need to give him a break, she thought as she collapsed to his mattress. It sprung delightfully under her weight, Rachel's eyes wobbling until she was still. "Like what you see?"

"What is the purpose of placing a poster on the ceiling?" She asked, her head tilting to one side and then the other as she evaluated the sultry expression of who she had to guess was a swimsuit model.

"Take a guess," he muttered with a roll of his eyes, carefully crawling onto the bed beside her and falling to his back. He mimicked her movement from before, surveying the poster and suddenly thinking it wasn't as great as he once thought.

"You're repugnant." Rachel turned her head, surprised to see that he, too, had his face turned toward her. Her breath caught in her throat and suddenly she didn't know what to do. Her mouth was dry and she couldn't speak. She just kept looking into his eyes and wondering if they were that color _last_ time. "Sorry about your fingers."

"'Sokay." He shrugged dismissively, lifting his hand up and fiddling with the Band-Aid. Anything to distract him from the intensity shining in Rachel's eyes. "Chicks dig scars."

Rachel breathed out a laugh, thinking that was such a Puck thing to say. Not just the offhanded (not to mention offensive) comment, but the way he said it was completely par for course. So forgiving, so self-sacrificing. He was never the type of person who would make you feel bad about your decisions. Even when he got the raw end of the deal, he just accepted it. As if he had expected it all along.

"Still," she said suddenly, lifting her own hand to grab the wounded index finger. She brought the bandaged digit down to her lips and placed a gentle kiss on the tip. "Sorry."

Puck turned from his back to his hip, the pressure he put on his left arm causing Rachel to mirror his movements. The two of them lied face to face, their inner arms interlocked with hands tangled together. Their faces were mere centimeters from one another, their hot breath mingling between them on the singular pillow. While his eyes remained still, focused, Rachel's continued to jump around. He could almost see the wheels turning, and he wondered if she was flashing back to the same memory he was. And, if so, was she doing so in anticipation or in contempt?

"Noah!" Puck's little sister came barreling into the room, stopping quickly and replacing her previous distraught expression with one of complete and utter mischief. "Whatcha doin'?"

"Beat it, rugrat." Puck hinged off the bed, his torso lifting without any additional help from his arms or legs. "We're busy."

"Mom said you guys were rehearsing a song," she answered, clearly forgetting about the awkward position she'd found them in. "I want to hear! She said I could listen!"

"Unfortunately, Sarah, we will be unable to perform the song for you this evening because your brother has injured himself." Rachel swung her legs over the edge of the bed, coming to stand in front of the small girl, trying to shake off the residual sexual tension. Sarah didn't look very much like Puck, or even Mrs. Puckerman, and Rachel wondered if that meant she was a clearer reflection on what Mr. Puckerman might look like. "But I hear you are starting to get into music as well."

"I am! My friends and I are doing a talent show in the spring and we're going to sing _and_ dance!" The energy of the eight-year-old was rarely matched, but if anyone could keep up, it would be Rachel.

"That's incredible! Do you know what you're going to perform?"

"Not yet. I have ideas, though!" Sarah's eyes grew wide, excitement dancing in the green flecks. "Wanna hear?"

It was a rhetorical question, Puck knew, Rachel being dragged out of his room and down the hall to his little sister's the second the last word came out. He collapsed back to lie on the bed, running his hands over his face in frustration. So much for rehearsing in his room. This was supposed to be a safe place. Somewhere they could work on the duet without him constantly thinking about how her lips felt pressed against his, or how right she felt nestled in his arms as they rolled around fighting for dominance. Now he couldn't even look up at the damn poster of the nearly nude supermodel without wishing she was a little curvier, with olive skin and chocolate eyes.

"Noah!" His mother shouted from downstairs, Puck double-timing to get down to the first level. She had walked into the house after being at work all day and nearly started crying when she saw Rachel in the living room. He had to calmly explain to her that Rachel was there to practice with him for glee (not to bear her six perfect, Jewish grandbabies), which led to her demanding she make a big, elaborate meal for her _family. _She had the night off (a rarity), but she needed to pick up a few things from the store. That was an hour ago.

"What the hell, Ma?" Puck asked, grabbing three of the five paper grocery bags his mother was trying to balance in her two arms along with her purse and keys. "I thought you were only gettin' a few things."

"I did." She surveyed the amount of bags now sitting on the counter. "And then I got a few more," she responded with a smile, hurriedly putting away the unnecessary groceries and moving the others around the kitchen. Pots and pans were produced in a flash, the oven coaxed into starting and something already simmering in the one skillet. "It's a rare occasion that I get to cook a big, kosher meal for my _family_."

"Stop saying it like that," he grumbled, knowing the tone and the look all too well. His frustration, unfortunately, only made her smile wider. He blew out an angry breath and turned to exit but stopped when he heard Rachel's voice getting closer and closer.

"… I'm sure he would agree."

Shit.

"Noah." Rachel turned into the kitchen, stopping when she saw him already standing in the middle of the room, his attention on her and not on the groceries like she expected. She cleared her throat to disguise her surprise, her hand still placed gently on Sarah's shoulder as her arm draped loosely behind the young girl's head. "Sarah is under the impression that you think singing and dancing is stupid and you are only in glee to, and now I'm quoting by the way, scam on girlies." She lifted one of her eyebrows up in amusement. "I told her that is simply not the truth, and you would agree with me."

Puck looked at the two girls, both staring at him with an equal amount of patience and determination. He briefly looked back at his mother and offhandedly wondered how a guy like him ended up in this situation to begin with. Since when was he surrounded by so many strong, opinionated women? He looked back at Rachel, seeing the look in her eyes and knowing that one well, too.

"She's right, rugrat." He left it at that, feeling like saying the words would be pointless. Rachel nodded her head in triumph, looking down at the small girl just in time to see her face light up in joy. Mrs. Puckerman sighed dreamily behind him, and he again turned to look at her. "Cut it out."

"Noah!" Rachel reprimanded first, stepping away from Sarah and swatting at his chest softly. "It is completely inappropriate to talk to your mother like that." He frowned, looking down at his chest. Was it weird that kind of turned him on? "Here she is slaving over a hot stove to make a wonderful dinner for us, and you just … just … shame on you!"

"Fuck, sorry," he drawled out.

Sarah gasped, putting her hand over her mouth to stifle her laughter. Rachel and Mrs. Puckerman scowled at the lone male, who in turn blew out another frustrated breath. The two women shared a look before Rachel turned her body completely around and surveyed the ingredients set out. Typically Rachel wasn't known for her cooking skills, spending much more of her time mastering the skill of baking, but she wasn't exactly inept either.

"Can I help you with anything, Mrs. Puckerman?"

"Well isn't that sweet," she gushed, reaching across the counter to grab a bag of fresh vegetables. Clearly both were set on ignoring his presence now. "Would you mind cutting these up for me? It's been so long since we've had fresh vegetables in this house and I wasn't really sure what to buy, but I figured since you are a vegan that you probably liked it all."

Rachel simply nodded, taking out the random vegetables with a smile. She actually didn't like Lima beans (the irony was not lost on her) or green beans, but technically neither of those were vegetables. She didn't like peas, either, and those definitely were. Luckily Mrs. Puckerman simply grabbed a couple zucchini and a squash (and a random ear of corn that Rachel wasn't sure was necessary), so Rachel washed her hands and the cutting board and went to work.

"You should hear her sing, Noah," she commented while chopping, sliding a few of the cut pieces to one side of the board as she looked over her shoulder. "She's absolutely amazing."

Rachel smiled as she heard Puck mutter something under his breath, but then he turned and she could hear the smile in his voice when he asked if Sarah would sing for him. It was suddenly loud in the confined space as Sarah squealed and then ran up the stairs, Puck taking them two at a time in a loud, thumping manner just to keep up. Then, like the calm after the storm, it was quiet.

Too quiet.

"I can't tell you how happy I am to see you, Rachel." She didn't pause long enough for Rachel to respond. "I was afraid after whatever had happened before winter break that I'd only see you in passing at the synagogue."

"What happened before winter break?" Rachel repeated, though it clearly came out as a question even without a certain inflection on any one word.

"One minute Noah was at your house and the next he was storming to his room and refusing to talk to anybody. Went on for days, until break started." Mrs. Puckerman shrugged, moving from one saucepan to the next. "I figured things were better when I saw Finn again, and now that you are here I definitely see a change in his attitude."

"You do?" Rachel questioned, wildly intrigued by the conversation even though part of her was extremely uncomfortable. She was taking advantage of this poor woman's lack of information, ignoring her own dark thoughts about what happened and focusing on them from someone else's perspective. Not just Mrs. Puckerman's, but Noah's too.

"Noah is never really the smiling, jovial type, but he now seems … content." Mrs. Puckerman bent to put some bread in the oven. "He stays out of trouble when you are around, too."

Rachel exhaled a smile, bowing her head as she finished her remedial task while her thoughts once again surrounded her. Aside from answering a few questions about school and glee and talking to Sarah about some backup options in case her friends didn't like the song she picked, Rachel was relatively quiet the rest of the night. She sat next to Sarah and across from Noah at the dinner table, consciously avoiding his gaze just so she could escape her thoughts for one meal. After dinner, he left to help his mom with the dishes and Rachel sat in the living room with Sarah and helped her with a math question for school.

"You're great in math, liar." Puck fell to the couch, pushing his sister's schoolbook out of his way as he lounged on the furniture tiredly. "Quit stalling and go take a bath."

Sarah huffed and started to protest, but Mrs. Puckerman quickly stepped in and ordered the young girl upstairs. She pouted into her goodbye to Rachel, climbing the stairs as slowly as she could while Mrs. Puckerman followed her just in case. If they weren't careful, Sarah would just lock herself in the bathroom all night but never clean up.

"You're a good brother, Noah," Rachel said eventually, tilting her head down slightly so she could see his face. Sprawled out on the couch like a cat, Puck's legs were hanging over the opposite arm and his torso was just barely stabilizing his head on the very end of the middle back cushion. If she moved her head down and over just a few more inches, they would be touching.

He grunted in response, his eyes closing briefly as he inhaled a deep breath. She smelled like strawberries and freshly baked bread, but that could still be wafting through the house from dinner. When he opened his eyes again, she hadn't moved, but something in her eyes changed. They seemed darker. Richer.

"You look exhausted," she commented in concern. "If Coach Bieste doesn't stop running you football guys into the ground every day after school, she's not going to have anyone left well enough to play the big game."

"It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't so damn cold outside now." His eyes closed again. "Did you want to go upstairs and work on the duet again?"

Rachel bit her lip in contemplation, hesitating long enough that it was obvious. "No," she whispered. Upstairs was bad. It was too confined, too private. She needed the space, needed the distraction. "I should go, actually."

"Go?" He questioned, his eyes flying open when he felt the couch shift from her sudden movement, a breeze actually skimming across the area. He followed her toward the front door, watching with a slacked jaw as she put on her big, fluffy coat and the boots she'd taken off as soon as she stepped into his house even though he told her they didn't do that here. "What about the duet?"

"There's no time limit for when it has to be done, Noah," she responded absently, straightening up and smoothing out some invisible wrinkles from her attire. "We'll perfect it later. You need to rest or you won't make it through school tomorrow or Friday."

"OK. Well …" he trailed off, resting the palm of his hand against the door and leaning some of his weight against it as he tried to think of why he was stalling. "Thanks, I guess." He frowned, not really knowing if that applied. "For dinner and Sarah and stuff."

"It was my pleasure, Noah." Rachel nodded her head, stepping once to the right and out of the way of the door as he made a move to open it for her. His hand was on the knob and just ready to turn it when doorbell rang. Rachel jumped in surprise, ending up closer to him than she had wanted. Well, sort of. The two stared at each other for a long moment, Rachel wondering how she constantly found herself in this situation with Noah. Of all the times she fantasized and daydreamed about so many impossible ideas, never once had they come true. But when she willed something so strongly _not_ to happen, particularly when it came to Noah and his proximity, it was immediately bound to become reality.

The doorbell rang again, and Puck literally shook his head to break their stare and looked at the door. His hand was still poised on the door knob, and he was desperately trying to send the signal to his hand to turn the dumb thing, but it wasn't working. The feel of Rachel pressed against his side had crossed some wires, and suddenly all he could do was catch a hint of lavender and feel her warmth course through his veins.

"I'll get it!" Sarah shouted, her steps down the stairs and to the door so quick that the two teens knew Mrs. Puckerman hadn't even realized she was gone yet. Dressed in a matching pant and long-sleeve pajama outfit featuring Hannah Montana, Sarah pushed her brother aside and swung the door open. She let out a high-pitched gasp and then sighed dreamily. "Hi, Finn!"

"Hey, kiddo." Finn smiled, looking down at the girl and then up at Puck, or the half of Puck he could see that wasn't covered by the door. "Hey, man. My mom rented this killer shooter game for me and I thought we both needed to blow stuff up after the practice Coach put us through."

Puck grinned in response, looking at Rachel from the corner of his eye. She looked like a scared puppy, two seconds away from peeing on the ground. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. Rachel wanted to make Finn jealous by singing a duet with Puck and giving the illusion they were spending time together. She didn't want him to know they were _actually_ spending time together.

"Sure. Come on in." He opened the door a little more, moving Sarah out of the way. "Rachel was just leaving anyway."

"Rachel?" Finn's voice caught in his throat, and no one was really sure if it was because he hadn't said her name in so long or if it was because he was surprised she was there. Her eyes were wide and her entire body tense, anxious beyond measure while Puck seemed completely collected.

"She's helpin' Ma with some bake sale for the synagogue." Puck shrugged, feeling Rachel's relief on his skin as she exhaled a grateful breath. "Lemme see the game."

She watched the two boys leave the room, Finn managing a wave and Puck not even looking back as he climbed the stairs. Sarah quickly followed (Mrs. Puckerman called for her a few minutes prior), and Rachel couldn't help but continue to stand by the door and listen as the footsteps grew quieter and quieter. Eventually she couldn't see them or hear them anymore, and she left the house frowning because she wasn't sure who she missed more.


	3. Short Trip to Crazy

**Author's Note:** Can't stop writing, so why stop updating? You guys are doing awesome in motivating me to continue, so no reason that shouldn't be rewarded, right? A million thank yous, as always, and please enjoy. I feel like I blacked out while writing it because my hands just took over and when I looked down it was nearly 5,000 words. I still love it, but it always means more coming from other people (it's sort of sad when I write it like that ...). So, you know, let me know what you think!

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><p>Rachel waited on the stoop of her house, her knees bouncing in an effort to stay warm. She could have waited inside, but her fathers were out running their typical Saturday morning errands and the house was too quiet for Rachel's liking. Lately, whenever she was left alone with her thoughts, they'd always come back to the same thing. And she really, <em>really<em> wanted it to stop.

And it wasn't so much because she was worried about the outcome of those thoughts. Or even what it meant she was having them at all. She was simply annoyed by their presence. Not to mention the insanely frustrating way they managed to not just affect her brain, but the rest of her body, too. In a not so subtle moment last night at temple, Rachel had actually sighed _dreamily_ when she had accidentally tuned out the rabbi and was left to her own devices. Her fathers had shared a quizzical look before moving their focus back to the front, Rachel slinking further down between the two and honestly wishing it had been her funeral.

Rachel nearly shouted in joy when her cell phone rang, pulling the tiny device out of her coat pocket and actually squealing at the name on the screen. "Hello?"

"Hello? Is that anyway to answer the phone?"

"Actually, yes," she giggled, moving the phone to her other ear and gloved hand. "How was yoga?"

"Refreshing, as always," Kurt answered happily, the sound of the wind crossing the receiver echoing in her ear. "One day I'll drag you with us."

"While I'm sure you'll have a greater chance with me than you will with Finn, I don't typically have Saturday mornings free."

"Right. Sorry, _Broadway_. I forgot." She could hear him roll his eyes, the sarcasm dripping from his voice. "So does that mean you can't tear yourself away to share a cup of joe with Blaine and I? We're at the usual spot."

"Is Mercedes with you?" She asked even though it didn't matter. He hummed in the affirmative, Rachel smiling in response. "Still can't. But thanks."

"Big date?"

"No!" She quickly said, realizing the quickness and high volume were probably uncalled for and most definitely would lead to more questions.

"Wow. Ear drums." Rachel sighed, hearing Blaine in the background wondering what the matter was considering he'd heard her even over the espresso machine. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing," she answered honestly, though it didn't sit well. Right then she was doing nothing, sure, but in a little bit … she wasn't even sure anymore. "I'm helping a friend with something for the afternoon. But I'll be back later if you wanted to catch a movie or something. Ask Mercedes."

"Mercedes, Rachel wants to know if you believe her nonsensical ramblings anymore than I do." Rachel scoffed, knowing Kurt meant for her to hear that. "Sorry. No such luck."

"Kurt …"

"What's the big deal about spending time with Puck?"

"How did you …"

"I go to a different school, Rach. I'm not dead." Again, she heard him roll his eyes. "Do us all a favor and take the stick out of your butt, okay?" She heard Blaine's voice in the background but couldn't make out the words. "Blaine says to have fun but not _too_ much."

"Goodbye, Kurt."

She quickly hung up, shoving the phone back into her coat forcefully. Without the distraction – though it wasn't necessarily pleasant – she remembered just how cold it was outside and couldn't help but sigh when Puck's truck came skidding into her driveway. She'd already told him Friday at school that she had a few conditions when it came to him driving her out of town. He made a remark about leaving the duct tape and rope at home, but she wasn't satisfied with his mockery until he also promised to obey all traffic laws and to ask for directions if they got lost.

"What the fuck are you sittin' outside for?" He didn't even get out of the car, just leaning over the cab and rolling down the passenger window. "It's like ten degrees outside, Berry. Get in here before you freeze your cute, little ass off."

She scoffed at his flippant compliment doused in vulgarity, pulling on the metal door handle and prying the door away from the frame. She used the arm on the door to hoist herself into the truck, smiling in determined satisfaction when she secured herself inside despite Puck's bemused attention to the attempt. Suddenly the thoughts that she was so worried would creep up on her were as far away from her mind as they ever could be, his behavior infuriating her.

"You're late," she grunted while pushing back into the seat, crossing the seatbelt over her torso and actually shivering in response to the sudden onslaught of heat.

Puck regarded her for a moment, taking a second to soak in her appearance before he shifted into reverse and drive so fast that Rachel actually rocked around. She groaned into the vehicular assault, knowing he was just testing the limitations of their previous agreement before he finally eased off the accelerator.

"What crawled up your butt?"

Rachel's mouth gaped open at his question, Kurt words echoing in her ear. Why was everyone saying that? She was nothing if not a pleasant person and she was sick and tired of everyone assuming she had some hypothetical stick in her rear end just because she wasn't afraid to voice her concerns about certain issues. Knowing what you want and being an uptight bitch were two very different things, and she honestly hoped Puck of all people knew that. Especially about her.

Especially since Finn didn't.

"Sorry," she mumbled, shaking the last thought from her mind. "Kurt called before you came."

"I thought you two were butt buddies." She felt his gaze on her but failed to reward his crudeness with an amused grin. "What did Hummel want?"

"Nothing." She sighed, knowing he wouldn't let her leave it at that. For all his noise about wishing she'd shut up, he was the one person who made her talk things out when usually she'd bypass them for fear of ridicule. "He just invited me to coffee with him, Blaine and Mercedes."

"Oh." He shifted in his seat uncomfortably, stopping at a light but keeping his eyes forward. "You … you could have bailed."

She furrowed her brows, turning her head to him. "Bailed?" She shook her head, following his lead and staring out the windshield. "Unacceptable. I made a commitment to you."

"It's cool. I would have understood."

"I know," she said it in that soft, vulnerable tone she got sometimes and he gripped the steering wheel tighter. "But that doesn't make it right." She shrugged. "Besides, you would never bail in the same situation."

Silence surrounded the pair for a good portion of the drive, the truck cruising north up the highway toward Toledo. He couldn't stop thinking about what Rachel had said, about whether or not it was true. She'd always had some crazy, unwavering faith in him and he was never really sure where it came from. No one else had it and he certainly hadn't earned it, either. But, for better or for worse, Rachel saw the best in people, him included.

"It's getting worse," she mentioned sullenly, her eyes still cast out the passenger side door watching the scenery go by. The trees and ground already had a thick layer of snow on them, but it didn't appear the weather was going to hold off any time soon. It was starting to get hard to see the highway, which meant the side roads were no doubt going to be an issue.

"Yea," he answered eventually, realizing she was talking about the weather and not the crazy, impure thoughts circling in his brain. "I need a distraction."

"I made a CD of the song so we could practice the duet." She pulled the jewel case from her purse, presenting it out in triumph.

"Really? Let me see." Puck took his right hand off the steering wheel. All at the same time, he grabbed the disc, used his left hand to roll down the window, and steered the truck with his knee. Then, in a flash, he tossed the disc out of the car, Rachel watching with wide eyes as it careened down the highway and into the concrete divide. "No."

"Noah!" She yelped, fire in her eyes as she focused back on him. "How could you do that?"

"It was easy," he answered with a grin, rolling up the window before settling back comfortably in his seat.

"Fine. Then we _are_ listening to my music. Any station I want," she decided, going against their previous agreement of no radio when they couldn't decide on a single station on Friday. She flipped the dial dramatically, bypassing the usual hot 100 stations she listened to in the car for something much more irritating. They were only an hour outside of Lima, so she didn't have to look too hard to find a good classical station.

"Fuck that noise." Puck pushed her hand away from the dial, clicking it off instead. The tug of war continued for a good minute or so, Rachel turning it back on and guarding it for a second before he moved to turn it off. "Cut it out!" He snarled, his chest actually heaving as the two stared at each other for as long as was safe to look away from the snowy road. When she went toward the console again, he immediately shooed her away.

"Noah! I was just going to turn up the heat. It's cold in here now that you opened the window."

"What are you talkin' about? It's hot as a crotch in here."

He again ushered her hand away from the controls, watching as she huffed out another breath, crossed her arms tightly over her chest, and sunk back into the seat. It wasn't like he'd never seen her pout before (today), but right then he felt differently about it than he ever had. He'd been responsible for her sour mood more than once, but this might have been the first time he actually felt bad about it.

Seconds tick by and Puck grew exponentially uncomfortable. His pride eventually lost, and he lifted his arm to yank down the sun visor over Rachel's head and grabbed a CD from the few selections in the slots. Some new kid on the football team last year made everyone a CD of pump up jams, and Puck had shoved it into the holder and forgot about it until just now. Shoving the CD into the player, he skipped to the appropriate track and then skipped through the song until it got to the part he wanted.

"To the sweat drop down my balls, to all you bitches crawl," he bellowed, succeeding in making her giggle in spite of herself. He turned down the volume so it was just barely audible, casting a glance toward her. "You can scoot a little closer over here if you're still cold."

Rachel jerked her head to the left, narrowing her gaze. He was always suggestive, but the tone of his voice was off. He almost sounded like he wanted her to, and not like a challenge but like … desire. She immediately flushed at the thought.

"I'm fine. Thank you."

Puck shrugged in practiced apathy, finally seeing the exit sign and getting off the highway. It was only a few more quick turns before they were at the guy's place, Puck leaving Rachel in the car to knock on the door. They spent about twenty minutes going over everything, and by the time Puck walked back to the truck, the snow had somehow managed to go from bad to worse.

"There's been an accident. Rather, a few," Rachel said the second Puck opened the truck door, sitting inside the cab with her just to get out of the snow. "Radio says even the highway is too dangerous to travel on right now."

Puck cursed his damn bad luck, dropping his forehead to the steering wheel. "It's early yet. We could wait it out."

" says it's not going to stop until late tonight." She chewed on her bottom lip, putting away the cell phone she had been using to occupy herself. "I've been thinking about it, and instead of risking our lives, we should just find a hotel. There were a bunch by the exit where we got off."

"I don't exactly have any extra cash, Berry. I just dropped all my money on that car over there." He pointed out his window toward the vintage-looking Corvette that looked pretty beat up but definitely worth the effort to make nice again. "What's your stance on sleeping in cars?"

"Noah," she rolled her eyes, seriously hoping he was joking. "I'll simply call my fathers. They'll pay for the room and then we can leave _safely_ in the morning."

Puck shook his head, unable to hide his disgust in missing the gravy train of life. "Must be nice." He pushed his weight into the door, basically falling out of the truck to exit. "Follow me."

"Wait. You want _me_ to drive the truck?"

"Did you think I invited you for the company, Berry?" Yes, the thought had crossed her mind. "I can't drive both cars back to Lima." He sighed at her wounded expression. "The truck will drive better in the snow. You'll be safer."

Rachel nodded slowly, exhaling a shaky breath and following his instructions. She was completely out of her element, and relied on Noah. He wouldn't intentionally put her in danger, and she had half a mind to believe he wouldn't unintentionally do so either. He pulled in front of her and drove at a snail's pace, the two of them meandering out of the side roads and to the hotel with no troubles. Rachel called her fathers who set up the room without a figurative blink of the eye, only making Rachel promise to be safe. Well, that and make sure they got a room with two beds.

"There's a freakin' hot tub here!" Puck practically shouted, clinging the amenities brochure in his hand while Rachel checked the room for any issues before she got too comfortable. "What do ya say, Berry? Wanna get wet?"

She rolled her eyes at him, moving across the room to turn down the heat. "It's stifling in here."

"I'm cool."

"Well, not all of us perpetually wear T-shirts despite the below freezing temperatures."

"Like you're one to talk," he scoffed. "I swear your skirts get shorter durin' the winter."

"Are you looking?" She challenged, smiling when he opened his mouth to reply but no words came out. "Maybe I'd be more comfortable if I cut my hair as short as yours."

"You aren't badass enough to rock the Mohawk."

"Please." She rolled her eyes, her hands resting on her hips. "You and I both know you only got that haircut because you're embarrassed about how your hair curls when it gets too long."

He was once again unable to respond right away, this time his mouth hanging open. Her memory was the most annoying thing of all. Well, that and the fact that she had some weird, cute smile on her face whenever she called him on his bullshit. That was annoying because he noticed it. And liked it.

"Yeah, well, at least I didn't cut my hair just because my boyfriend said he thought bangs were hot."

"Leave Finn out of this!" She demanded defensively, wondering how they went from teasing to fighting so quickly.

"Fine."

Puck fell back onto the bed he'd claimed, the sound of both of them regulating their breaths the only noise in the room without the heater humming in the background. He wasn't sure why he brought up Finn and Rachel's relationship. Maybe because he wanted to talk about it. Maybe because he needed a reason to kill himself.

"If you wouldn't have thrown the CD out the window, we'd be able to work on our duet," she replied after a long time spent in silence.

"Wanna make out?" He asked as he sat up, hoping she'd hear the joke in his tone. And she did, the tension released from her body even as she swung her arm out to smack his arm. "Ow, shit." Puck grabbed his upper arm, massaging away some of the pain. "I told you I was sore from football."

"Not very manly," she muttered, shifting her weight to the other foot. "Did you stretch before practice?"

"Of course I did." He rolled his eyes. "We always do."

"Well," she began in the higher pitch that indicated she was about to call him stupid in a lot more words than were necessary. "You can't stretch cold muscles, Noah. You're doing more harm than good because if you don't warm them up first, they're more likely to tear." She bit her lip, contemplating her next move carefully. "D-do you want a massage."

"Really?" He lifted his eyebrows in surprise, a cat-like grin spreading across his face. "Hell yeah!"

"Back and arms only, Noah," she clarified, smiling when he shrugged and flipped over to his back. Rachel worried her bottom lip between her teeth, looking down at her outfit as if she'd forgotten what she wore until just then. Luckily she was wearing tights underneath the short skirt, but it wasn't exactly the most appropriate attire to be wearing when you are about to straddle your ex-boyfriend's best friend. Although, using that logic, she wasn't sure there _was_ a more appropriate option.

Finally, she inhaled a deep breath and blew it out, crawling up the length of his body before settling onto his backside. She moved her hands in front of her and then paused, wondering how exactly to start. She'd been spending so much effort trying _not_ to touch him lately that it was hard to convince her brain that it was OK now. Slowly, her fingers curled around her shoulders, Rachel using her thumbs to knead the back neck muscles. Puck let out a long, drawn out moan, Rachel continuing with a little more confidence when she felt him melt under her touch.

"I could legit fall asleep right now."

She smiled. "Well maybe if you didn't stay out so late partying, then you wouldn't be so tired."

"Hey, I invited you," he defended quickly, his eyes still closed. "You could have came and then dragged me home at a decent hour if you cared so much."

Rachel frowned at his choice of words. She did care. That's why she _didn't_ accept his invitation. It was easier to hide between her two fathers and explain that after temple they always played a rousing game of Guesstures or equally fun family board game. It was easier to pretend she preferred the isolation of her own home than it was to admit she wasn't comfortable being confined to _any_ space with him.

"Finn would have been there," she answered instead, thinking that was the safer reason. The more obvious reason.

"Let me get this straight." Sitting on top of him, it was easy to feel the tension return in his body. Still, she continued to massage his back as he spoke. "You want me to sing a song with you to make him jealous and get him back, but you didn't want to see him at a party?"

She frowned, obviously not thinking that one through. She shouldn't have said anything. It only made sense to her. Every time she saw Finn, even at school in passing, her heart would constrict in pain, and an immense amount of guilt would flood through her, drowning her in sorrow. The onslaught of painful emotions was so suffocating that she was just barely keeping her head above water, practically choking on the waves of pleasure that she'd sometimes get throughout the day. She didn't deserve to feel happiness when she had hurt him so badly. Hurt _them_. She was sorry about what happened, even if she was slowly resigning to the fact that it had only been a matter of time.

"You wouldn't understand," she answered gravely, her hands stopping their kneading motion.

Puck rolled to the right, Rachel settling on top of the bed as he shuffled up to his knees, looking down at her suddenly broken stance. He was torn between wanting to punch something and wanting to take care of her, the latter surprisingly the stronger of the two. He wasn't becoming a pussy or anything; he just _really_ wanted her to verbalize what he swore he could hear in her tone.

"Try me," he replied, resting his back against the headboard and pulling her hips back so she rested between his legs; she was so tiny that he literally moved her that easily. He took a deep breath, trying to ignore the tickle of her shampoo and instead just focused on his own breathing and not the way her body molded inside his. He reached out tentatively and gently started massaging her back, hoping to coax out her confession.

"Noah …" She sighed, though she wasn't sure if it was in exasperation or in response to his seemingly magical touch. She immediately felt more at peace than she had in such a long time, the tension just oozing out of her with each twist of his fingers. "What we did was a mistake."

She frowned when his grip on his shoulders tightened painfully. It was almost enough to halt the rest of her explanation, but something about not being able to see his eyes (and him unable to see hers) helped her forge on.

"Finn and I should have broken up before I even invited you back to my house." Puck's hands had resumed their slow, kneading motion, and it seemed to trigger more thoughts to be pushed out of her mind and into the open air. "But I just put so much into making that relationship work, convincing myself that it was destined to last forever simply because … I don't know. Because I'm the glee nerd and he's the star quarterback, and that _had_ to mean something." She ignored the nagging voice in her head that told her to change the subject so it wouldn't suddenly burst into tears. "I should have just been grateful that he even dated me to begin with, but, instead, _perfectionist me_ couldn't get over the fact that we just … didn't _fit_."

It was a lot of information to take in at one time, Puck's hands still on Rachel's body but now not moving. They were just resting there, feeling the blood rush below the skin. His hands rose and fell in time with her breath, his fingertips vibrating lightly along with her heartbeat. The room was thick with melancholy, but he couldn't get over how comfortable the space was; he'd never seen Rachel act more relaxed than she was at that moment, her back eventually slumping against his chest while they both lounged on the bed. It wasn't long before their breathing had altered to match the other's, their inhales and exhales coming out simultaneously.

"I say screw 'em, Rach. You're cooler and hotter than any other chick in the school anyway."

"Really?" she asked breathlessly, tilting her head up from his shoulder to look at him.

He looked down at her at the same time, and suddenly they were in the same predicament they always seemed to find themselves in. Only, this time, there was no Finn, no little sister, _no_ hesitation. Neither was sure who moved first, but they cleared the minuscule gap between them quickly, their lips brushing against one another's. Puck seared the memory of the feel of her soft, pouty lips against his, savoring the taste of her chapstick spreading over his lips and tongue. She unconsciously bit his lower lip before plunging her tongue inside his mouth, and everything after that became a blur.

Rachel sighed when she felt his tongue glide across hers. Every other time they had kissed (which she wasn't going to think about had been more times than appropriate), the two of them would fight for dominance. They didn't want to just make out with one another, they wanted to _conquer_. But today, with her head still resting on his shoulder and one hand on his opposite shoulder to help him lean in closer to her, she let him take control – and he was taking his time. Each plunge of his tongue was languid, calculated. He was meticulous in his exploration of her mouth, and it made her want him _more_.

Which is precisely why she pulled away.

"I'm sorry," she stuttered, her breath ragged as she fumbled away from him and then off the bed. "I just … I meant to say thank you. I'm sorry."

Puck watched helplessly as she hurried out of the room, leaving with nothing but her cell phone and one of the room keys. Her shoes were still sitting by the door next to where he'd kicked his off, so he knew she couldn't go far. But the point was she had left to begin with, which couldn't have been a good sign. He wasn't sure what might have happened if she hadn't pulled away, but he liked to think he would have slowed things down eventually. No matter how hard he was trying to fight it, Puck had started to care about Rachel more and more, and he wasn't a big enough douche to let her do something she'd regret later.

And, from experience, they always regretted it later.

Thirty minutes later, Rachel entered the hotel room carrying the same items she left with as well as two bags of Chinese takeout food. She shyly peaked her head past the partition dividing the sitting area from the beds, sucking her bottom lip between her teeth when she saw Puck hadn't moved since she left. She exhaled a shaky breath, clearing her throat before she spoke.

"I bought dinner. If-if you're interested."

Puck turned at the sound of her voice, surprised she came back and surprised she was talking to him again. Her face was flush and he could see the worry in her eyes even in the distance, and he instantly yearned for the relaxed Rachel from before. Still, this Rachel was making an effort, and he was pretty hungry.

"I'm starvin' like Marvin," he replied with a lazy smile, pushing his fists into the mattress to pry himself off the bed.

"I just got a tiny bit of everything," she handed him one of the wrapped up things of silverware, keeping her gaze down as she picked up a few napkins for herself and moved to sit in one of the chairs. "I didn't see anything that you wouldn't really like."

Puck nodded his head, surveying the selection with a growing smile. It was no secret that his family's tradition was to eat Chinese food and watch _Schlinder's List_ together, but Rachel had participated in the common event firsthand. Grabbing an egg roll out of one of the containers, Puck bit into the fried food and chewed into his long moan.

"This shit is bangin', son."

She rolled her eyes. "I'm glad you like it, Noah." She was still nervous, but she could feel herself become less so as he continued to act completely normal. Or maybe it wasn't an act. He was really just acting like himself, and it was refreshing. "Consider it a more appropriate thank you."

Puck let out a snort of laughter as he added some sweet and sour chicken to his plate, putting the container back on the table as his eyes lifted up to meet hers. He couldn't see the worry anymore, but he did recognize the familiar shining in her eyes. He always had it pegged as passion (which she poured into everything she did in life), and it gave him some sort of sick satisfaction that it seemed to be shining just a little bit brighter than it had been before they kissed.

"You're welcome," he finally responded, his mouth half full. "For real though, I preferred the first one."


	4. Need You Later

**Author's Note:** Hello everyone. I have some good news and some bad news. The **bad news** is that (as you might have noticed) I will not be updating this story every day. Sorry. The **good news** is that I've made this decision after writing about five other chapters for this story! *sigh* So much for a 5-parter. LOL! I'm going to change the rating from T to M starting at the next chapter simply to accommodate for the extra length (and therefore more swearing on Puck's part) as well as the shift of plot. Basically, I was thinking, "How fun would it be to write Puck having to go slow?" And, yea. Things spiraled out of control (but in a good way). Point is, hopefully I don't lose any of you in transition. If you aren't down for reading the M-rated stuff, please note that Chapter 5 will wrap up the story enough that you wouldn't feel like I left you on a cliffhanger.

This is already an author's note of epic proportion, but I need to say thank you to EVERYONE reading and reviewing this story. Seriously. You guys are awesome and I hope you continue to follow me through this crazy (fun) journey! And Jann, you already know you rock my world, so I'll let it slide that you've taken a break from your writing to read this update. Now get back to work and write that ending. LOL!

Finally, a _**disclaimer**_! This is basically the Super Bowl episode, so I've taken a lot of dialogue and scenes straight from the show. Seriously, I watched the duet so many times to analyze every little glance and move just to make that scene perfect (more perfect, I guess). However, that said, I also took some liberties with the scenes (naturally, or I would just be transcribing what happened and Puck and Rachel didn't end up together in the episode, so that just wouldn't do ...). Regardless, the point is, don't sue me. I don't own Glee aside from on DVD and I don't own the song "Need You Now" aside from buying it on iTunes.

Anywoo, I hope you like (love) it - and then review to tell me why (or why not). Thanks!

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><p>Puck strolled into the choir room, his eyes landing on Lauren and wondering how she got down to rehearsal so quickly. They both had eighth period together, which he didn't know until he started going to class more, and they actually sat next to one another and he swore they left at the same time. Lauren was cool, not like other chicks where he had to watch what he said around them in case they were on their period or something. Plus he wasn't trying to get into her pants anymore either after their disastrous 30-seconds-in-Heaven. He'd been honest when he told the glee club that Lauren had rocked his world, but it was because she had shown him that he didn't actually have the urge to sleep with anything female that moved.<p>

He had standards. Who knew?

"That's it!" He heard Finn shout, everyone's attention on the slushied Artie. "Screw rehearsal! This ends here and now!"

Puck rarely needed a reason to join a fight. "We're goin' to go all … _Thunderdome_ on those guys!"

"So this is what the ladies lounge looks like on the inside," Kody teased as he led the football players into the choir room, halting the glee guys' ambush.

Puck listened to Sam try to sound a lot tougher than he was, and then there was some animosity between him and Finn worth noting before Coach Bieste and Mr. Schuester came in and asked everyone to sit. Like parting the Red Sea, the football guys went to one side together and the glee kids went to the other, Puck turning just in time to see Rachel walk in late. Not _later._ Late. Like she was doing it on purpose. Like she _had been_ doing it on purpose since driving back home yesterday.

Rachel bowed her head and quickly took her usual spot in the front row, moving just a few chairs to the left to put a little more distance between herself and the football players. She already knew what was happening before Mr. Schuester started to explain, but that didn't stop her from voicing her opposition right after Finn.

"There's _no_ way I'm sharing the choir room with a known homophobe!"

She glared to her left, seeing something that looked like guilt pass over David's face. It wasn't good enough, though. His constant bullying and foul attitude were the epitome of what was wrong with this school, the world. People should be free to do whatever makes them happy, and that included singing in glee or finding someone of the same sex attractive. Why did he care so much anyway?

"Rachel. Puck. Haven't you two been working on something?" Rachel's eyes widened, so lost in her thoughts that she didn't hear Mr. Schue lead up to the question. "Why don't you give it a whirl?"

"Fine," she agreed quickly. "As offended as I am by their presence here, I won't let anything get in the way of a performance."

Puck scrambled out of his jacket and toward the front of the room, trying to manage an equal amount of diva attitude but failing miserably in comparison to the master. One of the band kids handed him his guitar and he got it situated just in time to see Rachel nod to Brad that he could start playing the piano. For the first verse, Rachel's eyes were coyly trained on Finn, those few lines the summary of their current relationship. But then, when it came time for Puck to join in, Rachel turned her gaze to him and he drew closer without even knowing he was doing it.

_It's a quarter after one_

_I'm all alone_

_And I need you now_

_Said I wouldn't call_

_But I've lost all control_

_And I need you now_

_And I don't know how_

_I can do without_

_I just need you now_

By the time they get to the end of the chorus, to the point where they had the long, harmonious note together that they practiced about a hundred times, they nailed it. He couldn't even hide his excitement while he kept playing, inwardly telling himself it was because they sounded great and not because she was looking at him _like that_.

Rachel bit her lip when Puck started singing his verse, the tone of his voice causing her to actually shiver. She didn't want to toot her own horn (okay … maybe she did), but she couldn't have picked a better song for them to sing together. Not only were the lyrics dead on, but their voices complimented each other so well. Unfortunately, while his singing remained flawless, Rachel started to notice his temper creep into his expression. Even as the last word of his part came out, he made an intimidating move toward Azimio and she knew she had to pull him back before the performance was ruined.

Puck felt Rachel's hand graze across his back at the exact moment he heard her blend her voice with his into the chorus. And, like magic, he was calm. All his rage was instantly gone, his attitude immediately shifting from "Puck" to "Noah". And Noah, despite the larger than usual audience, couldn't get the smile off his face as he sung his heart out. He wanted her to hear the emotion in his voice, hear that the lyrics held meaning for him, too. For _them_.

_It's a quarter after one_

_I'm all alone_

_And I need you now_

_Said I wouldn't call_

_But I've lost all control_

_And I need you now_

_And I don't know how_

_I can do without_

_I just need you now_

She felt the words he sung penetrate her bloodstream, the feeling coursing through her veins as she heightened her own singing just to match his fervor. In the back of her mind she remembered the duet was supposed to be about Finn, but by that point she couldn't look away from Puck. When she moved, he moved, like an intricate dance that she couldn't help but wonder if it would have worked even without the music. And, like getting her wish, the song was quickly over and the music stopped. Her eyes lifted to Finn's for an inconspicuous moment, the fleeting feeling of joy taken over by that all-consuming aching feeling that settled in her stomach.

"The girl with the Mohawk had a really nice voice." Puck smiled at Azimio, nodding his head while casually taking off the strap of his guitar. And maybe he was overreacting (too many emotions swimming around inside of him), but he didn't even blink when he lifted the guitar up as a weapon and moved toward the football player. Coach Bieste quickly grabbed him and then everything went to Hell, Puck almost blacking out as the next thing he could remember was standing in front of the trophy case with Finn after school the next day.

"Hey."

"Hey," Puck responded in an equally awkward tone. This was going to be hard. "We used to be best friends." That probably wasn't the best opener, considering. "Before I got your girlfriend pregnant ... and then made out with your other girlfriend."

"Yep," Finn muttered.

"Anyways …" There wasn't really a good way to segue from that. "I gotta be honest. I really wanna win this game. I figure it's the only way us glee studs are going to get any respect around here." And maybe, just _maybe_, if he were more of a football star then he'd be closer to being equal with Finn.

"What's your point?"

"My point is that none of that is going to happen unless you and I become allies again. Like Ice Man and Maverick at the end of _Top Gun_."

"So then why'd you sing that duet with Rachel?"

Puck's mind flashed back to the memory of when Rachel had stormed into the choir room and demanded he sing with her to make Finn jealous. But then he thought about everything that happened over the course of last week, ultimately ending with the kiss on Saturday. Or maybe even the duet itself. There was no denying their chemistry, and he wasn't going to apologize for it anymore, either.

"It's complicated," he answered honestly, hoping he hadn't been imaging the subtle changes in Finn lately. The way he came to Quinn's defense so quickly today in glee … that wasn't usual. And what he said, _how_ he said it, wasn't platonic, either. Shit. Now he was starting to think like a chick. He'd have to check his junk later and make sure he wasn't growing a vagina or something.

"Puckerman!" The shrill sound of the petite blonde's voice caused both the boys to turn to their left, each of them taking in her facial expression to gauge whether they should be as scared as they both suddenly felt. "I need to talk to you."

Puck sighed, seeing Finn's face furrow in concentration. Really, _really_ bad timing. "Sup?"

"Privately," she answered coolly, managing to toss Finn a coy smirk while pulling Puck away from the trophy case and toward the auditorium. The space was completely abandoned, not even the janitor in sight. The lights were dim and the mood would have almost been romantic if he hadn't wanted to be anywhere else. "I wanted to talk to you about your duet with Rachel."

He groaned. "You too?"

"I just …" she smiled softly, keeping a loose grip on her right arm while her eyes focused on her foot as it kicked at an invisible rock. "You looked … _happy_." She shrugged sadly, continuing to talk without looking at him. "It's silly, but, I still remember when you sang your first solo in glee, and even though you were singing to Rachel and I was with Finn, I was _actually_ swooning over you." She rolled her eyes when his chest puffed out a little. "But, watching you yesterday … you _deserve_ her, Puck."

He coughed out his exhale, choking on the air and her words and the feeling of them cutting right through him. His head whipped to his left and right just to make sure no one had entered the room in the last few seconds, his paranoia setting in deep. It was one thing to be thinking about it, maybe even hoping for it, but it was quite another altogether to _say_ it and Quinn had crossed that delicate line.

"Let's be honest, okay? Next year we'll be seniors and then after that it's over. Sink or swim." Finally, Quinn lifted her eyes to meet his. "I'll probably go to state, Finn too. Our lives will stay in Ohio. He'll end up running Kurt's dad's garage and I'll sell real estate while taking care of our two kids."

"What about Sam?" He asked for no other reason than he was curious if she even knew her and Finn weren't dating anymore.

"I think you of all people understand that who you are with doesn't always best reflect who you _should_ be with." She paused only long enough for him to absorb what she had said. "Rachel is going to get out of here. She's too talented for her own good and too damn stubborn not to." She smiled in spite of herself, both of them knowing that was the nicest thing she had ever and would ever say about Rachel. "And you're going to get out of here, too."

Quinn smiled softly, feeling the weight of her guilt from last year when she called him a Lima Loser finally lifting off her shoulders. "And I don't mean because of her." She shrugged, surprise in her voice. "Plus, you seem to rein her craziness in enough that she almost becomes tolerable." She paused, considering her words. "You know, in spite of all the bullying and the constant teasing, she still managed to make two of the most popular boys in school fall in love with her."

Puck felt his heart stop when Quinn said love, the word having so many connotations to it. He spent his entire childhood seeing just what love meant and the second his deadbeat dad finally left, he vowed he'd never find himself in the same situation. And then he grew up, and everything with Quinn happened. She really opened him up, the rush of love he instantly felt for Beth rocking him to his core. It took him a long time to deal with all that pain, and he still wasn't done. He had just learned that stealing cars and ATMs weren't the way to solve his problems.

"I've been in that situation before," he finally said, now Puck the one avoiding eye contact. "They always pick him."

Quinn frowned into her response, knowing the "they" included her. "The good news is I don't think it's a choice for Rachel anymore."

And with that, she sauntered off and he didn't really see her again the rest of the week. Well, he probably did, but they were so busy with practicing for the big game and all the extra work going into the halftime performance, and then everything that happened with those hockey idiots, that he didn't have the energy to notice. Then, on the eve of the biggest game of their lives, he was sitting in glee listening to Mr. Schuester and Coach Bieste explain all their hard work had been for nothing. They didn't have enough players, and they were going to have to forfeit.

Rachel could feel the morale in the room sinking, the small brunette looking to her left and right and waiting for a subtle nod from each of the girls before quickly standing up and facing the remaining members of their team. As expected, the girls' gracious offer was met with a lot of uncertainty and doubt. But, luckily, they had prepared for just that situation.

"Rachel, have you ever actually seen a tackle football game?" Mr. Schuester asked skeptically. "When they tackle you, it hurts."

"Yeah, and not in the good Mellencamp way."

"We thought about that," Rachel responded, smiling at Puck's comment. "But the truth is that you guys don't actually need us to play; you just need enough players out there to field a regulation team. So when they snap the ball, we're just going to lie down on the ground. We're just going to lie there."

Puck listened to her explanation with a bemused expression, no longer surprised by the sheer velocity of her words when she got excited. She'd also just spat out the longest sentence about a sport that he'd ever heard her utter, and he was pretty sure it exhausted her entire knowledge of the game. And, despite his reservations about their chances, he was happy when Coach Bieste agreed to let the girls play.

Rachel squealed, clapping happily. "Football team! Football team!" She raised her arm as the boys got out of their seats to thank the girls. First she high-fived Sam, then she raised her other hand out toward Puck. He pressed his palm into hers, then flicked his wrist ever so slightly and gripped her hand in his, bringing them both down and against his chest. She could feel his heartbeat thundering in his chest, felt his anxiousness seep out of his pores and enter hers.

Puck pulled her out of the choir room, leading her to the alcove of the hallway just in case others picked that moment to leave. He thought his palms were sweating and he felt short of breath. None of it made any sense since he had no idea what he was going to say. He just knew that it had almost been a week since they last kissed and there was a statue of limitations on situations like this and he didn't want to miss his opportunity.

"Noah, we need to rehearse. Without the Cheerios and all the football players, our halftime number is sorely lacking in …"

"We need to talk, Berry," he interrupted, finally dropping her hand when he suddenly took a seat. This was stupid. He was Puckasaurus. Am-badass-ador! He shouldn't feel like he's going to pass out just because he had to have a serious conversation, especially not when it was with _Rachel_. Rachel, who was just standing in front of him waiting for him to talk while she kept fiddling with the hem of her dress. "God," he groaned, stilling her hand. "Do you have to look so hot right now?"

She blushed into her reply, "I didn't realize I was doing anything particularly enticing."

"Well you are." He pushed his elbows off his knees, letting his torso lean against the wall, his head also slumping back with a thud. "You keep wearin' dresses lately and I swear it's fuckin' with my head."

"You said you liked dresses," she answered quietly. "And since when did you start keeping a record of my attire?"

"Since when did you start carin' about what I liked?"

"I don't know." Her voice was barely above a whisper, her eyes cast back down to her hands wringing in front of her. Her answer sounded like a cop out, but it was simply the truth. She wasn't sure when she started caring about what Noah was saying, or wanting to please him. "It just … _happened_."

Puck snorted out a soft chuckle, thinking she had stolen the words right from his brain. He wasn't sure when he started paying more attention to Rachel, but he couldn't stop. And he knew it wasn't something new, both rather something he just couldn't ignore anymore. The old Puck would have certainly sealed the deal the day he and Rachel made out before break. No question. But, because it was Rachel, something stopped him. Like … his _conscience_ or something.

"Hey, Rach?" Each of them turned at the sound of the familiar voice, their heads tilting up as Finn drew walked closer and closer. He didn't seem surprised to see her with Puck, but maybe she was just imagining things. "Could we talk?"

Her eyes drifted off the tall teen's face to Puck's, searching his for her response. But he wasn't the type of person to give her answers. He would always encourage her, occasionally give her advice or point her in the right direction, but he always let her make her own choices. But what if she chose differently than expected? There was a higher chance than normal for her to end up with nothing, and she wasn't sure if it was worth the risk. She didn't know if _he_ thought it was.

"I'll see you guys later at the game," Puck said in way of an exit, giving the two some privacy. Maybe he was a coward, be he really just didn't feel like having a front-row seat for the Finchel reunion, take three. And even if that wasn't the case, then he certainly wasn't ready for that, either. He needed to clear his head and get ready for the championship game, but even _that_ seemed to have a double meaning now.

Because the only question on his mind was who was going to end up winning.


	5. Winning it All

**Author's Note:** OK, that lapse in updating chapter 4 and y'all being able to read it sucked. So, sorry about that! Hopefully that doesn't happen again because I'd love to hear more from you guys on what you think of everything that's going on! I want to add another disclaimer to this chapter, as it is also some stolen dialogue and events from the Super Bowl episode, but again tweaked for my P/R flair. Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone reading and reviewing. This story would have stopped here if it weren't for all the support, and now it is set to be about 20 chapters (FYI). So, stick around. This is going to get fun. (:oP

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><p>Rachel studied her reflection in the mirror, her eyes noting the cut of the football jersey and how the bright red fabric made her hair look shinier, healthier. Lauren had applied some eye black to each of her cheeks, the greasy residue clearly being used for intimidation factor only since it was dark outside. Frankly, Rachel wasn't convinced it would work considering she was wearing a boys' size medium jersey specially made from the Lima Pee Wee Football Association to conform to the varsity style. Plus, if her size wasn't enough of a give away, she had almost as much experience playing football as she did watching it – none.<p>

The other three girls were just about finished getting changed, all of them pumped up for the big game. Rachel, however, couldn't shake the nervous feeling swimming in the pit of her stomach. She never got nervous before a performance, but this wasn't exactly close to her comfort zone. And there was, of course, the X-factor of Noah. He'd stalked off so abruptly earlier that afternoon when Finn approached them, and she still couldn't get over the look in his eyes before the interruption. She just _knew_ he was on the verge of saying something really important.

Not that she was upset with Finn. Their conversation, though still tinged in that odd unfamiliarity that came after being romantically linked to someone (seemed backward, didn't it?), was surprisingly civil. He had told her that he was proud of her, which quickly rendered her speechless. She listened as he talked about her really going after what she wanted, about the little ways she'd changed for the better – like being more of a team player and everything with Kurt. Thinking back, she swore she thought he might have been trying to tell her that _someone_ instead of something had caused the change, but she wasn't given much time to ask since their conversation was interrupted by Coach Bieste.

It was a running theme in her life lately.

"The guys are already out there," Mercedes said, pulling the door to the girl's locker room open even though her gaze remained back on the three other girls. "Coach Bieste wanted us all to meet on the sidelines before taking the field. I think she's worried we don't know what a blitz is."

Rachel nodded her head, trying to appear stern and determined even though she was really wondering when Mercedes picked up all the sports jargon. Where were they taking the field? She didn't even realize it was capable of moving. And she _didn't_ know what a blitz was, so she really wanted to hear Coach Bieste's speech. Clearly she should have taken notes earlier when she went over the basic rules and regulations.

The buzzing of the crowd penetrated her ears first as they exited, her inner star bursting out of her at the excitement surrounding the stadium. She walked along with the other girls, her helmet secured at her side, just soaking in all the attention. One day, she'd be in a situation very similar to this, with everyone watching her was agape mouths as she dazzled them with her flawless rendition of _Amazing Grace_ or something equally patriotic. She just _knew_ it.

"I can't believe you have gold stars on your helmet," Artie stated as the girls approached, his eyes level with where Rachel had her helmet secured on her hip. She frowned and looked down, evaluating them again as they sparkled under the sheen of the bright stadium lights. They were cute. "It's just so you."

"Thanks," she replied brightly, following suit of the other girls and putting her helmet on. The team was getting pumped up for the game, and Rachel couldn't help but bounce around merrily. Finn ran toward her, slapping his hand on top of other players' helmets as he passed. One thing that she did know about sports was the male rituals during such events were a bit unusual; she'd never understand how some men could be so homophobic and still see nothing wrong with slapping another guy's butt in congratulations.

"I'm so excited!" She said as best she could with her mouthpiece in place, Finn smiling down at her and giving her a knock on the helmet, too, before moving on to the other girls. She blinked a few times, shaking the ringing out of her ears as her gaze followed his retreat. She didn't even have time to inwardly wonder if Finn knew anything about girls before Puck forcefully grabbed the wire cage in front of her face and made her look him in the eyes. His face was so serious, so intense, and she couldn't help but sigh, thinking she'd missed him too much for only being separated for a few hours.

"Are you ready for this?" Puck asked, meaning the game but maybe a little more than that. He'd been watching her since the girls came out of the locker room, and he thought about not talking to her until after the game. The avoidance thing had worked in his favor, his sweaty palms nonexistent now. But, he couldn't just avoid her because it was easier for him. For _them. _Tonight was about football and he needed to make sure she was prepared for what could happen out there tonight. This was the championship game and that meant the other team knew how to play. They weren't going to care she was a girl or that she kept calling touchdowns grand slams.

Rachel snuck her hand inside her helmet, spitting out her mouthpiece before looking at him. "Let's kick some ass!" She grinned wildly at the look of comical appreciativeness passing through his eyes before he shouted out a loud cheer and then slapped her on the top of the helmet. She was just about to resign to the fact that maybe he didn't understand girls anymore than Finn did when she suddenly felt his hand smack her ass. She turned abruptly and scowled at him, her lips curling up when he just winked before they all took the field (it was like took to the stage; she got it now).

The first half of the game was brutal. With the girls just immediately falling to the ground, Finn was left practically defenseless. If he didn't get the ball thrown fast enough, he was tackled. And when he did throw it, sometimes the other players caught it, which even Rachel knew wasn't a good thing. Rachel was exhausted and entirely out of her usual pep by the time Tina got hurt. She didn't think she could feel like anymore of a loser, but the scoreboard was just one of the many blinding examples to the contrary.

Finn must have felt it, too, because he suddenly stepped up as the leader she always knew he was capable of being. Sam finished the last few minutes of the half as quarterback, and Finn returned just in time for the half-time show with Quinn, Brittany, _and_ Santana - which Rachel was pretty sure shocked more than just her. While they were getting their zombie makeup on, Puck actually managed to convince the other players to perform with the glee kids.

And the performance had been spectacular. Really innovative and fun and it made Rachel yearn for a large audience even more deeply. And not just that, but a bigger team, too. One of the most intimidating things about Vocal Adrenaline was their size, though that might be a little backward now that the tiny Sunshine Corazon was no doubt their female lead. Jealous or not, Rachel still sort of regretted that decision.

Standing on the sidelines at the end of the game, it was actually hard to believe they won. It was empowering, to think that their small-town school with so many obstacles thrown at them during the course of the week managed to come out on top. They'd beat all the odds and they won. And even though she wasn't usually the type of person to believe such instincts, at that moment she instantly knew the momentum would carry forward into the glee club's performance at Regionals. They, too, had the odds stacked against them, but they would come out on top.

Puck was one of the firsts to break away from the pack of people surrounding Finn. He was entirely too stoked that they'd won to be jealous that Finn had been the one that saved the day. Plus, Rachel was in his line of vision, jumping up and down while moving toward him like a cracked out jack rabbit. She was tiny but quick, her body slamming into his as she leapt into his arms and just expected to be caught. Hopefully it wasn't the only leap of faith she'd take tonight.

"We won! You were amazing! _This _is amazing!" Rachel pulled her head back from off his bulky shoulder pad, her grip around his neck loosening until her hands rested on opposite sides of his chest. Her cheeks hurt from smiling so wide, but she couldn't stop. Her spirit was renewed, and she was ready for the post-game celebration, which she heard was set to be epic – her _first_ party.

Puck knew it wasn't possible, but he could feel her hands pressed into his chest even over his football gear and suddenly he was transported back to just a few hours ago. The feel of her hand in his, pressed into where his heart beat in his chest, had been so overpowering before that he chickened out. All the negative things about himself that he just knew were true started swimming around in his head, and then Finn interrupting them was just icing on the cake. But now, after triumphing over the higher-ranked football squad after such a terrible first half, his outlook on life seemed a lot clearer. A lot more optimistic. He could actually picture a timeframe outside of next week, next year. And, as gay as it sounded, he wanted Rachel in that picture.

"So … Quinn says that I'm in love with you. Do you wanna go out?"

Rachel's mouth dropped open, the two sentences so short but nearly bulldozing her into the ground. "_What_?" She asked, if only because she wanted to be certain the ringing in her ears hadn't been a more severe condition than she originally thought. There was that one play where one of the other players accidentally stepped on her. Could she be suffering from some freak head trauma and not know it?

"Like, date," he clarified quickly, still trying to appear flippant about the whole thing. "And not to make Finn or Quinn or anyone else jealous, but just to … date."

Rachel blinked hard a few times, her fingers fisting Puck's jersey. The unconscious move forced him just an inch closer, but that distance made all the difference. He moved his hands to rest of each of her hips, Rachel's eyes closing as she tried to concentrate on what he'd said – not to mention what she wanted to say back – and not on the soft stroke of his thumb on her the area above the protruding bone. She knew he didn't technically have ADD, just a trouble with being still, but the subtle movement reminded her of him playing the guitar. She couldn't help but wonder if he was trying to play _her_.

"Exclusively?"

Puck scoffed, suddenly pissed he had been internally begging her to say something when _that_ was what she'd said. "Fuck, Berry. Yes." He took a step back, their connection broken as he ran a frustrated hand over his skull. "I mean I'm still a stud so I'll have to fight the ladies off with a stick, but … I won't screw any of them or nothin'."

"Charming." Rachel rolled her eyes, putting a little more weight on her right foot as she crossed her arms in front of her chest. She was close to getting all the answers she needed, but not quite there yet. "Why does Quinn know anything about … us?"

The word was unfamiliar when talking about the two of them. Puck and Quinn had been an "us". Rachel and Finn had been an "us". But Puck and Rachel? They'd been "we" a few times for glee assignments and what not, but they'd never crossed that line into more intimate territory. And now, with it seemingly so close to possible, she wondered if they were ready for everything that it entailed.

Because, frankly, the angst was easier. They'd gotten pretty good a tiptoeing around each other, and Rachel sadly thought she could live a happy life with just the few blissful memories she had of them together. Then there would be no hurting Finn, no dealing with all the death threats from the other girls at McKinley, and no mind-numbing terror that she'd have her heart shattered from the _one_ boy she actually _knew_ she'd be able to give the whole thing to.

"She grabbed me on Tuesday and made me talk about feelings and shit." He shrugged, thinking back to their conversation. "She said I looked happy during the duet. Said _you_ looked happy." His voice was full of surprise, and she frowned in response. As if it weren't possible that she could be happy with him. "I'm pretty sure she just wants me to distract you while she pursues Finn again, but it was the first time in a long time where she hadn't been a major bitch, so I let it slide."

Rachel bobbed her head once in understanding, mentally noting the look on both Quinn and Finn's faces a few moments ago after the game. Through all the chaos, she swore she saw those two lock eyes, and Rachel hadn't been the least bit jealous. It was strange, but she kind of felt relieved, like she didn't need to hold onto her guilt anymore. Like it didn't matter as much that she'd started to have real feelings for Noah so soon after dating Finn (even _while_ dating Finn) because he was moving on, too. Rachel wasn't naïve enough to think it could be that simple, but it did somehow dull the rough edges of the intricate love-rectangle the four of them had going.

"Finn sort of talked to me about the same thing earlier today." She stopped mid-thought, shaking off the weird way their two ex-significant other's had sort of given them their blessing. Or, if what Puck was saying was true – that Quinn was planning a reunion between her and Finn – then maybe they were just trying to make themselves feel better. "Which you'd know because you were there." She smiled. "It was about a minute before you _bailed_ on me."

Puck narrowed his eyes, hearing the emphasis she put on the word and thinking back to their trip to Toledo last week. She'd put faith in him that he wouldn't abandon her in a time of need, and technically he'd done just that. Maybe not in an Earth-shattering way, in a way where they'd both really regret even thinking about dating seriously, but it was enough that he saw her point. If he couldn't even tell her how he felt when it was just the two of them, what would he do when faced with the opposition of the entire school? The entire _town_?

"You're right. I freaked." He shrugged sadly, inwardly thinking that if this was really going to work out that he'd have to get used to apologizing – and admitting that she was right. "I just … haven't decided if I'm what you need."

"Have you ever considered that it wasn't your decision?" She smiled coyly, repositioning herself so they stood as they were before, with her palms pressed against his chest and his hands moving to her hips. "I'm starting to think it wasn't mine either, you know?" Her eyes fell from his eyes, focusing on where her fingers were running mindlessly over his jersey. "How could it be, when the whole time I'm thinking I'm with Finn and that's the best it could ever be? The _star_ quarterback."

Puck took his hands off her hips, moving them over her arms and then grasping her tiny hands in his. They each looked down at their hands, surprised at how perfectly they fit together. It was so natural to have their fingers intertwined, one of each of their hands pressed against one another's chest, feeling their heartbeats equally entwine.

"We fit," he croaked out, feeling like he owed her some honesty even though his knee-jerk reaction was to lean in and kiss her, show her just how wrong she was. She didn't even know how good it could get. She had _no_ idea. "You said you couldn't make yourself fit into the role of Finn's girlfriend, but … you wouldn't have to change for me, B."

Maybe it was the way they were holding each other, clinging to one another just as much as to the hope that they'd waded through all the bullshit and we're finally going to see the fruits of all their labor. Or maybe it was in the words they'd shared, the confessions stronger and more honest than anything they'd ever allowed themselves to say out loud, to themselves let alone each other. But the only thing that mattered in that moment was that they both leaned in and kissed the other as if their lives depended on it. They weren't holding anything back, long past the encounters where they tried to keep their true feelings buried deep down inside them. This wasn't an accident. A mistake. It meant something. It meant _everything_.

Rachel's hands cradled the back of his head, bringing him closer when it didn't even seem possible. His hands roamed her back, bunching the fabric of her jersey tightly as he deepened the kiss, plunging his tongue inside her mouth. Each of them moaned at the contact, melting even more into the embrace as they dueled for dominance.

"Gawd!" The sound of Kurt's high, exasperated voice startled the pair, the two of them breaking apart as if they'd been caught by their parents. "I'm sure there will be food at the party. No need to devour _each other_."

Rachel rolled her eyes, a smile replacing her scowl when Puck draped his arm over her shoulders, eliminating the sudden space that had been between them. "Hey, Hummel," Puck snapped his fingers impatiently. "My eyes are up here."

"I just forgot how binding that uniform was," Kurt remarked with his trademark grin, tossing a glance to his left at Blaine just to avoid Puck's hard, disapproving stare. "Are you guys going to shower here and then go to the party or are you going home first?"

"I need to go home. I don't want to show up at my first party wearing the same thing I wore to school today," Rachel stated, horror in her tone.

"You could just wear nothin'."

"While I'm slightly nauseated to have heard that, it might not be the worst idea considering your wardrobe." Rachel frowned at Kurt's comment, but her head was still tilted up looking at Puck, blush rising on her cheeks. "We'll see you there."

The new couple watched the two friends – or whatever they were calling themselves at that moment – walk away, toward Kurt's father and Finn's mother. Rachel watched as the woman's mouth moved, clearly talking to her stepson even though her eyes were trained on Rachel. In the distance Rachel swore she could see the shock in the wide, green eyes, Carol's facial expression definitely giving away her confusion regarding the new pairing.

"You're like a mom's wet dream," Puck remarked dryly, shaking his head as they both turned away from and began to walk toward the parking lot. With the excitement of the win and the adrenaline from admitting their feelings to each other wearing off, Puck and Rachel suddenly remembered just how cold it was outside. "Helpin' with dinner, makin' us do homework. Shit's ridiculous."

Rachel rolled her eyes, half-thinking about her retort and half-thinking about Finn's mother. Carol had adored her, pointing out that Finn was so much more dedicated to his schoolwork and his household chores when she was in his life. The two of them had been in and out of a relationship enough times that Mrs. Hudson-now-Hummel knew her son as Rachel's boyfriend and as Rachel's ex-boyfriend and she'd told her once in confidence that she preferred the former. Rachel still felt her heart swell with pride when she thought about it, but then she also remembered Mrs. Puckerman had said the same thing about her affect on Noah. And it made her feel even better.

"It wouldn't kill you to apply yourself a little more, Noah."

"Oh, I'll apply myself," he leered, pushing her arm just hard enough that her body turned, her back knocking against the frame of his truck. Puck trapped her between his two arms, dipping his head down to the crook of her neck. Rachel's eyes fluttered closed the second she felt the tip of his tongue brush against her pulse point, her resulting shiver having absolutely nothing to do with the frigid temperature outside. Rachel wasn't the only one who was capable of changing the way someone behaved.

Against all odds, Puck managed to pry the less careful girl out of Rachel's tiny exterior. He forced her to be bold, to take chances. He fueled her in a way that was unmatched by anyone else, and maybe that's why it didn't die down even when they were apart. It was like just the thought of him kept the spark of something better firing inside her. He was so spontaneous and laid back – so the opposite of her. And yet, they meshed. They evened each other out. They _fit._

"Noah," Rachel whimpered, her head drifting to one side while her hands unconsciously moved up to grip the hem of his jersey. She held onto the fabric tightly, as if she let go then he would disappear. She could feel his abdominal muscles clench from their proximity, the hard plane of his stomach well defined even under a jersey and undershirt.

"S-shit." His teeth dug softly into the skin over her collarbone, his head woozy but lifting away from her in a feeble attempt to clear away the fog. Kurt was right. This uniform _was _binding, uncomfortably so as he strained against the stretchy fabric. "Do we _have_ to go to the party?"

"Excuse me?" She asked breathlessly, still trying to clear away the cobwebs that only he seemed to be able to place in her otherwise brilliant mind. "Noah _Puckerman_ doesn't want to go to a party?"

"Not when his hot-as-Hell girlfriend is just a locker room shy of fulfilling his greatest fantasy."

"Noah." Rachel's slight shake of the head in disapproval did nothing to disguise her reddening cheeks. Had the girlfriend label not slipped out of his mouth so effortlessly, she might have been able to muster up a bit more admonishment. "I need to go shower."

"Yep." Puck grinned, pushing himself away from her and opening the passenger door all in the same motion, the distance clearing his head and getting them out of dangerous territory. "That's exactly how it starts."


	6. Slow Party

**Author's Note:** I'm updating this now because I'll e out of town for the weekend and won't be updating again until Sunday. It's a short chapter so I don't think it will exactly tide anyone over, but I'm hoping you still like it and still have plenty of feedback for me. I can't get enough of this story, and I hope y'all feel the same. To those of you reading and reviewing, a million thank yous. I don't drink or smoke or any of that, so your feedback is seriously my drug. And I'm hooked, so keep it coming. (;oP

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><p>Puck leaned his shoulder against the flat surface of the wall, the hand of the same arm loosely holding the rim a red plastic cup full of some really gross beer. There was this large punch bowl of mystery juice that everyone seemed to be enjoying more than the keg, but the concoction was bright pink and Puck was too much of a guy's guy to walk around drinking that. His girlfriend, on the other hand, had been sipping the beverage through a coffee stirrer happily, claiming it tasted like pink.<p>

_ His girlfriend_.

It was hard to believe how much had changed so quickly. This morning at school she was still sort of avoiding him and he'd crapped out later that afternoon. But now, hours later, they were together. Well, he was standing by the beer pong table and she was in the living room next to Mercedes and Tina as they watched some people play a drinking game from some stupid TV show. But, romantically speaking, they were together.

Rachel looked away from the television suddenly, the feel of Noah's gaze on her as tangible as the red plastic cup clutched in her two hands. She moved her lips to encircle the tip of the makeshift straw, her eyes peeking down to the fruity liquid before she looked back up over the rim. He was standing next to a wall on the other side of the room, his body leaning against it enough that she knew he was buzzed but not drunk. When he pushed off and began his pursuit toward her, she couldn't help but smile at how the alcohol made his already lazy swagger even more sloth-like.

"Hey, babe?" Puck plopped down on the couch beside her, paying little regard to Tina and how he'd almost sat on her. Luckily the Asian girl was laughing too hard at something Mercedes had said to really notice. "Wanna share?"

"You have your own drink."

"It sucks." He looked down into her cup. "I want to taste yours."

She giggled, wondering if he knew he was pouting. "Well, I suppose I wouldn't be a very good girlfriend if I didn't share my drink with my boyfriend."

"I don't want your drink." Puck pushed her cup away from his face as she was presenting it to him, Rachel furrowing her eyebrows in confusion. "I said I want a taste." His lips crashed into hers, his right hand coming up to her face. He used his thumb to tilt her chin up, the other four fingers curling softly over her neck. He nipped at her bottom lip, sucking on the pouty flesh before slipping his tongue inside the moist cavern of her mouth. Then he ran the tender flesh over the roof of her mouth, swirling around her own tongue before pulling back appreciatively. "Mmmmmm."

It wasn't even a word let alone a sentence, but it shot through Rachel faster and stronger than she ever thought possible. Her breath was unsteady, her hands poised on his shoulders. At the initial contact, she had planned on pushing him away. They were in the middle of a crowded area – Puck was now leaning heavily on her instead of basically sitting on Tina, but still – and Rachel wasn't exactly comfortable with gratuitous displays of affection. But the second after the first second, it was like all the wires in her brain sending the signals to her hands to push him away were fried. It took everything in her not to pull him closer.

"You're right." He grinned, licking his lips. "It does taste like pink."

Rachel heard his voice, knew he was looking at her, but she couldn't take her eyes off his lips. There was a sheen of light glistening off where he'd just moistened, the thin lip looking so smooth and perfect right then. His upper lip was even thinner, almost untraceable if the corners hadn't been turned up into a sly grin. There was mischief all over his expression, though the only thing Rachel could think was that it was criminal he looked that good.

"There's probably an empty room around here we could go into," Puck's eyes shifted down, stopping at her lips for a brief moment before lowering even further. It had taken a little convincing on his part, but he'd actually managed to get her out of her house _not_ wearing an animal sweater. Instead, she was wearing a dress that was very similar to the one she'd wore during their duet – in that Puck saw that it, too, was cut low enough that he could almost see some boob.

"I haven't had _that_ much to drink, Noah." Rachel rolled her eyes, desperate for an excuse to change the subject. "And while maybe Tina has and therefore she has not noticed, you are basically squashing her. If you'll recall, she was injured during the game and adding your drunken weight to her tiny frame might not be beneficial to the healing process."

"I knew she got hurt." Puck looked over his shoulder at Tina. "You didn't get any blood on the jersey, right? Because that shit comes out of the budget for next year's loot."

"Real sensitive, Noah." Rachel sighed, excusing herself to use the restroom. Mercedes and Tina giddily decided to join her, as if there were a public restroom that could accommodate all three girls at the same time. Considering the amount of people there, how long the party had been going on, and the average amount of bathrooms in these sized homes, Puck figured the girls would be waiting in line for awhile.

"Denied!" One of the football players, Tommy, announced loudly, taking the seat previously occupied by Mercedes while four other teammates followed. Puck adjusted his position on the couch, lounging back casually while looking over at Tommy. "That was cold, dude."

"You got cockblocked by your own girl."

"And Rachel Berry, at that," Kody grinned devilishly, having a bit more insight into the Puck/Rachel dynamic thanks to his involvement in the glee club this week and the years of bullying he'd done to Rachel. "That's twice now, right?"

"Shut your mouth, fat ass," Puck growled, tipping Rachel's drink back and swallowing the remaining liquid in one gulp. There was no mystery there was vodka in there, but that shit was strong. He was suddenly relieved to know Rachel had only had about half of a cup. This was her first party, her first drink, and he'd told himself that he was going to take it easy tonight to keep an eye on her.

"Wow. Someone's sexually frustrated," Tommy chuckled, patting Puck's shoulder sympathetically. "You're wasting your time, Puck. Rachel Berry is closed up tighter than Fort Knox."

"I like a challenge," he muttered, shrugging off Tommy's hand.

"Don't get me wrong. When you seal the deal, I want to know about it." Tommy moaned, his eyes closing for a second as he thought about it. "I bet she's a screamer, you know?"

Puck clenched his jaw, his eyes closing too as he tried to sift through everything racing through his head. The effects of the alcohol seemed to hit him abruptly, his emotions wavering between blindly pissed off to completely apathetic that he managed to stay in a neutral area. Kody and Tommy were going on and on about Rachel hitting high notes and Puck being a living legend after he stole the precious Berry V-card. And while part of him just wanted to throw his fist across both their faces, the other part preferred this type of rousing over dragging his reputation through the mud. It wasn't like he hadn't heard the same thing (and sometimes much worse) in the locker rooms, and he'd much rather be considered a player than a pussy.

"I didn't even get any boob action last time, but I'm already this close." Puck inched his index finger and thumb apart, smiling wickedly as his head rested back against the back couch cushion. "Then we'll see."

"Well let's get it over with." Rachel's curt voice tore through the football players' laughter, her tiny frame squeezing between two of them so she could stand directly in front of Puck. She ignored the immediate flash of guilt she saw pass through his eyes, bending her torso over to lean over him. "Here." She forcefully grabbed one of his hands, placing it on her chest for a second before quickly pushing him away. "Now we don't have to waste another week."

Puck watched her stalk away, pushing through several people just to get to the back door exit. The football players all teased and taunted him as he stood up to follow, but he didn't even care. He knew what he did was wrong, and the worst part was that it was exactly what she had been worried about. He'd done exactly what Finn did, picking his reputation over her. As if his reputation was so great.

"Go away, _Puck_," she spat, standing off to the side of the back porch. It was nearly pitch black outside, and the way she caved into herself made it nearly impossible to see her. But he could hear the pain in her voice (and the anger – she'd _never_ called him Puck. Ever.) and he couldn't leave.

"Three hours," he said after doing the math in his head. They'd left the game around 9 and it was just past midnight now. "That's a new record for me."

Rachel bit back her tears, turning so she could see his face even though she knew he was still having trouble seeing hers. "This isn't going to work. We can't even go one evening without getting into a fight."

Maybe it was what she said, or maybe it was how she said it, but Puck couldn't have moved to her fast enough. His steps were desperate, his voice pleading. "We're going to fight." He didn't dare to reach out to touch her, even though he could feel the heat radiating off her body. "You're bat-shit crazy and I'm an asshole. It's just bound to happen."

Rachel huffed out a breath, taking a step back from him and shivering in response. She'd come outside without her coat and it was below freezing now. Suddenly she was regretting her independent decision to walk home, knowing she'd probably freeze to death on the mile-plus trek. But anything was better than the feeling she'd had when she heard Puck talking to his teammates. They were being so vile and crude, and Puck _should_ have defended her honor. Rachel would never expect him to declare his undying love for her (_especially_ in front of his friends), but there was a big difference between right and wrong and he'd chosen incorrectly.

"You are an asshole," she pouted, moving to sit on the swing behind them. Puck slowly joined her, still trying to hide his smile that she'd cursed. He knew he wasn't out of the woods yet. "But, I guess it is partially my fault." Puck raised his eyebrows in surprise, certainly not expecting that. "The sexual frustration, I mean."

Rachel sighed, thinking about what Mercedes and Tina had been saying in the restroom. With their inhibitions dropping as their blood alcohol level rose, both the girls' lips loosened and in five minutes Rachel had learned more about the pair than she ever wanted to. But, the most disturbing of all was Mercedes recollection of her time with Puck. They'd only been together for a little more than a week, maybe two, but apparently there was no learning curve when it came to Puck and sex. Mercedes said they never went all the way, but there was a lot of heavy petting and the way she described the power he seemed to have over her … it was eerily similar to what Rachel felt.

"Away from you, I'm fine," she began softly, her eyes focused on her lap. "Away from you I know I'm not ready and it should happen a certain way, after a certain time." Rachel lifted one shoulder in an empty shrug. "But then you're near me and … all I can think about is the sweet things you've said. All I can hear is your voice, smell is you and … it _consumes _me."

Sue him, his chest puffed out a bit. "Ain't no problem with that, B. It's called attraction," he stated matter-of-factly, wondering if she was impressed to know he actually had learned something in chemistry last year.

"I don't want this to just be attraction." She sighed, biting her lip as she contemplated what she wanted to say. She didn't want to be mean, but there was really no nice way to explain herself. "I don't want this to just be about the chase for you."

Puck's posture immediately stiffened, his gaze hard as he stared at her, willed her to look at him. Her breath caught in her throat at the intensity in his eyes, Rachel sucking in her bottom lip. She instantly felt bad after saying it, even if it had been true, because she knew it would hurt him. She could almost hear his guard being put back up – it was easy to recognize a wall when she had so many of her own – and knew she had to get him talking before he completely closed off.

"Have you ever … had to wait before?"

Puck was still sort of pissed, but he considered her question. Sometime in the eighth grade he had gotten sick of all the bullshit middle school flirting, and the kissing and teasing just wasn't doing it for him anymore. So one day he decided sex would be pretty cool. He spent the next day convincing Santana it would be awesome (both physically and for their popularity, which was something she'd cared about since moving to Lima in the sixth grade from someplace where she had no friends), and that was it. Aside from that 24-hour span, he could only think of one more.

Quinn.

That wasn't the best example, though, because that _had_ been about the chase. It was about the bad boy claiming stake on the chastity ball cheerleading princess and he'd spent the entire summer before high school and a good portion of ninth grade trying to trick her into sleeping with him. And then she picked Finn and it became an even _more_ exciting game. It was about luring her away from Mr. Perfect, about finally doing something better than the great Finn Hudson.

"After babygate, with Quinn," he finally answered, his voice low. "She didn't really trust me, with good reason." He shrugged softly, now Puck the one who kept his gaze down. "We tried to make it work, be a real couple with the feelings and everything, but it just … wasn't real."

Puck swallowed thickly, his mind traveling back to a time he'd put a lot of work into forgetting. They'd had sex a few times during the pregnancy, and they'd both tried to convince the other that their love was true, but you can't bullshit a bullshiter. He could see her shattered dreams in her eyes, and she could see the unsettled feeling in his every action. And then Quinn had the baby, and they tried again. They tried to go back to a time before all the mess, but too much had happened. Her pregnancy had changed him, made him want to support her and take responsibility for what they'd done, and it took a long time for him to be able to look at her and not see the small, half-Puck-half-Quinn face of their baby girl.

"Before my dad left, it was always drilled in my head that being a man meant having sex." Rachel blinked hard a few times, surprised to not just hear his voice after so long, but to hear him talking about his father. "But that's not right, you know? Being a man is being strong enough to deal with the consequences of sex."

Rachel smiled sadly, proud that he'd learned such a valuable lesson but sorry he had to learn it in one of the most difficult ways she could imagine. She may had been wrapped up in Finn, but she had known Puck for a long time and she knew when he was hurting. He spent the summer moping around town, and then he started acting out. She knew it would have only been a matter of time, and looking back she was actually glad he had been sent to juvie because it really seemed to set him straight.

"You're a good man, Noah." She lifted her hand off her leg, resting it over his. She exhaled unsteadily, her smile widening when he laced his fingers with hers, squeezing tightly. "The one I want to be with. Just … not yet."

Puck nodded, taking some satisfaction in the thought that Rachel pictured the two of them getting to that point in their relationship. This wasn't about sex for him, and she knew that. If it had been, they would have never stopped when she was trying to get back at Finn. If it had been, he would never open up to her like he just did. But that didn't mean he wasn't relieved to know she was thinking "when" and not "if".

"That's cool," he finally stated, standing up off the swing and extending his hands out toward her to help her up. He needed to shake off the chick flick feel of the evening, otherwise he'd have to start wearing dresses, too. "And, look; your boobs are awesome, but I promise I won't touch them again until you tell me it's cool."

Rachel laughed out loud, shaking her head before resting it on his shoulder, letting him guide them around the house and back toward his truck. Their serious conversation had quickly sobered both of them up so they didn't bother saying goodbye to anyone. The truck's spot on the side of road allowed them come and go as they pleased since they weren't boxed in like those that had parked in the driveway.

Puck opened the door for her, holding his hand out to assist her in hopping inside, and watching appreciatively from behind as she struggled to get up into the seat. "But perhaps on the drive home we can negotiate some ass time."


	7. Magic

**Author's Note:** Well my beach trip had a bit of bad weather, so I wasn't really AWAY like I thought I would be, but everything turned out for the best. Well, you know, except for that I tried to make up for lost time this afternoon and now look like a lobster. But, regardless, I was really cookin' writing ahead for this story, so the updates should continue to be rather steady. I am doing my best to thank everyone who reviews individually, but I can't say thank you enough to you guys reading and leaving feedback. So, thanks and enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** I stole a bit more of dialogue for this chapter from Silly Love Songs or whatever that episode was called. Fair warning.

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><p>Rachel walked into the front doors of McKinley High School with Puck's arm draped across her shoulders. She'd already told him that she didn't need his protection (which is what she knew he was doing), but he just kept clambering on about how her height made the position so comfortable. A natural resting place. She had rolled her eyes, of course, but decided not to fight him on it. They had plenty of other things to fight about, for sure, and Puck wasn't really the hand-holding type. So it was a win-win.<p>

And, in the spirit of winning, the school felt like it was on Cloud 9 for the first day back since winning the big championship game. It seemed Friday night's party never really stopped, extending into the new week just as lively as it was then. The cheerleaders were heartbroken they'd missed the big event, especially when the result of their absence had been such a complete and utter failure. Quinn, Brittany, and Santana all had plenty to argue about before first period started, the three girls actually having lines next to their lockers for the details of why they'd so wickedly abandoned their supposed friends.

Brittany didn't want to die; Rachel understood that one. Quinn, while it made sense, seemed to be looking at it from a much bigger picture. She loved cheerleading, but it was obvious her idolism for Ms. Sylvester had finally deteriorated enough to make her choose glee instead. That left Santana, whose decision was still a giant question mark for Rachel and obviously the rest of the school. It was almost impossible to recognize her that first time when she wasn't in her Cheerio uniform.

"Oh, barf. For reals?" Santana crossed her arms tightly over her chest, the few Cheerios surrounding her fanning out just in time for her to move and follow Puck and Rachel. "I heard you two were screwing in the middle of the football field, but I thought it was just a twisted rumor."

"You saw us at the party together," Rachel recalled, frowning slightly when the Latina tarnished what in Rachel's head had been a very romantic moment between her and Noah.

"It was a party." Santana rolled her eyes. "I always see Puck with a girl."

Rachel's frown deepened, her head tilting up toward Puck's. His arm still hung loosely over her shoulders, but his jaw was as tight as his other hand's grip on his backpack. The two old lovers stared at each other with fire in their eyes, Rachel desperately wanting to go before everything erupted into a fiery mess. Was it really only 7:50 in the morning?

"Leave her alone, Satan. Or _I'll_ cut _you_."

Santana stalked off, a line of Cheerios following in her wake. Even out of the uniform, Santana still possessed a higher than average amount of popularity, amount of power. Plus, since the change was so recent, the younger Cheerios didn't have a new leader yet. They weren't sure who to follow, but they weren't the type of girls who could very well lead.

The others that had been around the trio look shell shocked, honestly surprised to see Puck defending Rachel. Those who knew him – or thought they did – couldn't decide if he was doing all this as a joke or if he was just rebelling in a different kind of way. But the thought that he might really have feelings for Rachel, the idea that the two of them dating again was real, really didn't seem to cross anyone's minds. In fact, it was the one idea that hadn't been guessed.

"I heard he's doing it to stay out of juvie."

"I saw them at the party. They broke up."

"She's doing it to get Finn back."

"He's just dating her until Lent."

Word of her and Noah's relationship spread so quickly that by the time the lunch bell rang, Rachel had a headache. She was so sick of hearing everyone else's opinions on her marital status, even more so when those bitchy, whiney voices were saying the exact same things that were already going through her head. All the nasty looks and actual death threats weren't helping either, which is why Rachel found herself eating lunch on the bleachers outside even though it was only a little over forty degrees – high for Ohio, actually.

"Hey, midget," Santana's voice echoed in Rachel's mind, the latter's eyes closing tightly in hopes that it was just a vivid, hellish daydream. "Out here grazing?"

"I wasn't bothering you, Santana. Couldn't you offer the same consideration?"

"I could, but I won't." The Latina wiped some invisible debris off the bleacher, primly taking a seat two rows down from where Rachel was sitting. No one was dumb enough to actually be outside right then, but just in case she didn't want to give the appearance that she and Rachel were friends. She stuffed her hands deep inside the pockets of her large, puffy coat, her face hidden by a ring of fake (Rachel hoped) minx skin around the hoodie. "Look, I hate you. You hate me. It's better that way."

"But?" Rachel asked, her voice tinged in impatience.

"_So_ you need to stay away from my man." Rachel blinked a few times in surprise, wondering if her headache had transformed into something more severe, like an aneurysm. "Do you hear me?" Santana turned then, facing Rachel instead of the football field. "Puck's good for two things. Popularity and sex. If you ruin the first one, there won't be any point to the second."

"Maybe popularity doesn't matter as much to Noah as it does to you."

"Are you serious?" Santana sighed heavily, shaking her head in disgust before turning her body even more toward Rachel. "I'll break it down for you since you don't seem to be connecting the dots. You and _Puck_ have nothing in common. He's Sex. You're Love."

"Did it ever occur to you that perhaps the two aren't mutually exclusive in others' worlds?"

"Oh, I've considered it." Santana rolled her eyes, standing up to leave but not before getting in the last word. "But Puck isn't one of those others."

Rachel huffed out a hot breath, the release of warm air replaced by a debilitating cold as her focus shifted from just staying warm and being quiet to her mind racing with a thousand different thoughts. Her body shivered in protest but Rachel remained seated on the cold, metal bleacher, trying to find the fault in Santana's words. And not just that, but in the hundred other votes against her and Puck making it through the week. People were actually betting, and the likely count was Wednesday.

Rachel wasn't naïve enough to think there wasn't merit to what Santana was saying. She knew couples could engage in sex without being in love – and, oddly enough, she'd seen a special on the television about the opposite problem. Puck had certainly demonstrated a sexual prowess that definitely didn't rely on any true, deep feelings. But, even though it had only been a few days, Rachel could see that mindset changing. He hadn't once pushed her to go any further than kissing, and he'd kept his hands to himself just like he promised.

Maybe Puck was Sex, but perhaps what Santana and everyone else didn't know about was _Noah_.

Rachel smiled at the thought, ignoring her teeth chattering as she considered this new evidence. On the surface, it would seem like her and Puck didn't really have anything in common. Aside from being Jewish, they _were_ exact opposites. He was the bad boy and she was the good girl. In high school, things could be as cut and dry as that.

But, really, they had a lot more in common than people gave them credit for – her and _Noah_, anyway. For one, they were _determined_ to get out of Lima. They weren't motivated in the same way, but both of them would break out of this small town at any and all costs. And while they both lived very different lives, they both were victims of a single-parent home. Perhaps Rachel didn't have the financial hardships that the Puckermans dealt with on a daily basis, but the emotional side effects of her mother's abandonment and his father's absence were practically identical.

And maybe the biggest commonality between the two of them, the one that was the center point for this very line of thinking, was that he wasn't just a bad boy and she wasn't just a good girl. They both were forced to deal with the stigma of their reputations, both of them trying in different ways to alter the way people thought about them. They were still struggling with that last bit, she thought when she heard the bell for the next class, but at least they each saw a different side of the other one – the one that was a better mix of who they really were.

At the end of the day, Puck strolled into the choir room and was a little more than relieved to see Rachel already there. She been noticeably absent during lunch, and their English class was split up this week between the classroom and the computer lab to work on a paper they had due at the end of the month. As luck would have it, they were in opposite groups, so this was the first time he'd seen her since this morning. Maybe it was stupid, but he couldn't help but feel better when he saw her, especially as she sat next to an empty seat in the middle row. He was a back of the class kind of guy and she was a front row center kind of girl, which is precisely why they'd already compromised on sitting together in the middle row.

"Hey, babe." Puck tossed his backpack under the flimsy chair, plopping down into the hard plastic and immediately reclining the seat to just two legs while his arm moved to drape over the back of Rachel's chair. He leaned in quickly and smacked a kiss to her cheek, grinning when she returned his affection with a bright smile. "Sup?"

Rachel's eyes moved to her left, taking in Santana's proximity as the Latina chatted with Brittany and Artie. She frowned slightly, still thinking about what she had said, but shrugged emptily in answer to Puck's question. Her headache was all but gone, and she'd felt better after lunch once she thought of all the ways her and Noah were similar, but the last half of the day had been as emotionally exhausting as the first half. She rested her head on Puck's shoulder, sighing and letting her eyes close.

"Ya'okay?" He asked, genuine concern in his voice. He'd seen Rachel sick before, but even then she was intense. All her energy was put into making herself feel better. But, this … this wasn't sickness. This quiet, detached girl was a different kind of scary. And, considering the look she'd tossed the back of Santana's head just prior, Puck was pretty sure what might be on her mind.

He wasn't deaf, obviously. Or stupid. He'd walked up and down the same hallways today as Rachel, and he knew what people were saying. He'd had to constantly remind himself that one trip to the principal's office and he'd violate his probation. Otherwise, more than one person would have felt the full extent of Puck's wrath. He could handle what they said about him – he'd heard it all before and it slid down his back effortlessly. But, the things they said about Rachel, those hit closer to home; those mattered more to him.

"Do you mind that I call you Noah?" She asked suddenly, her voice quiet because she wasn't far from him and because Mr. Schuester had just walked in and started the lesson.

"What?" He asked, not necessarily because he hadn't heard her but more because he hadn't understood.

"Would you rather I call you Puck … at school, anyway?" Her head lifted from his shoulder, her big, brown eyes wide and focused solely on him even as Finn stood up to address the glee club. He was talking about the glee kids not being slushied at all today and how it had everything to do with his celebrity status. Seriously. His words. Douche.

"Nah." Puck bent his wrist so his hand wasn't hanging off the back of her chair but instead stroking her arm softly. "I like being Noah to you."

Her wide smile from before was back, and Puck wasn't sure how he seemed to make her that happy with something so little, but it was kind of awesome that he had that power. In a world where it seemed like no matter what he did he was always two steps behind, it was nice to be so positively rewarded for something that was completely effortless. That 100-watt smile made up for every other shitty thing going on, especially when it was aimed only at him. And even more especially when she turned her head toward Finn and the smile completely disappeared.

Everyone listened to his ego – because they hoped the real Finn wouldn't be so arrogant; no I in team and all that – inflate to a size unmatched by anyone. Luckily they had Santana in their group to knock him down a few pegs, but even that wasn't working. The attention shifted off Finn and onto the Latina instead. Lauren laid into her, then Quinn, and then Tina. Mr. Schuester had half a mind to stop all the bickering, everyone knowing Santana wouldn't go down without a fight, but then before she could even get the next offensive line out, Rachel opened her mouth.

"The truth is, Santana, you can dish it out but you can't take it." She leaned forward, using her hands to talk as her frustration grew. "OK, maybe you are right. Maybe I _am_ destined to play the title role in the Broadway musical version of _Willow_, but the only job you're going to have is working on a pole!"

Puck and the rest of the glee club watched in shock as Rachel finally ripped into Santana, standing up for herself for the first time ever before storming out of the room. Santana quickly followed, not storming out so much as leaving from the opposite side of the room. She actually looked like she might cry, which is why it didn't surprise anyone that Brittany followed. After that, Mr. Schuester pretty much gave up on completing a lesson for the day, dismissing everyone with hopes that they'd come prepared Wednesday.

Rachel might have turned into the two-headed monster there for a little bit, but she was still Rachel, so he knew if she wasn't at her locker then she'd be in the auditorium. Puck bypassed Finn trying to gloat about his kissing booth idea, barely giving the tall teen a second glance when he took the shortcut through the science labs to the other side of the school. Seeing her sitting at the piano bench, mindlessly playing the same note over and over again while her head rested on her arm, Puck couldn't help but smile softly while taking the seat next to her.

"Soooo … that was unexpected."

"Why? Because I'm Rachel Berry and she's Santana Lopez?" Rachel scoffed. "I can never win. I let myself be a doormat and I just get stepped on. I finally stand up for myself, and I get a lecture?" She huffed out another breath, shaking her head even as it slumped further. "She's a robot anyway. I honestly doubt I hurt her feelings."

Puck couldn't help the small laugh that escaped, his amusement only doubling when Rachel's head snapped up. "I said it was unexpected. Not that it wasn't awesome." She opened her mouth but nothing came out, and he actually thought she might have spoken her word limit for the day after that last diatribe. "_But_ I think I know you pretty well and I don't think all this has to do with Santana."

"Oh, it does," she scoffed again, going back to playing that same stupid note.

"Why? Because she slept with Finn?"

"What?" Her hand slipped onto a few more keys, the notes ringing to a stop before she could get over her surprise. "No. Because she's slept with _everyone_." Rachel sighed, really thinking "you" but not saying it. Because that wasn't really the issue. Well, it was, but it wasn't one she could deal with yet. "I can't compete with her."

"I didn't know you two were in a competition."

"Me and every other girl in this school." She looked at him pointedly, knowing he couldn't be that oblivious. "I've come to accept the fact that we have more in common than I think anyone knows. Perhaps I like musicals and you like rock n' roll or I'm a vegan and I've seen you eat steak wrapped in bacon, but we actually share a lot of the same values. And I think that's more important." She sighed, trying not to be deterred by his bemused expression. "But that doesn't mean the physical stuff _isn't_ important."

"The physical stuff?"

"Sex," she hissed out, her eyes lifting in exasperation. "And I know you said you were fine with taking things slow, but … sex _appeal_ even. Eventually that appeal is going to wear off and I don't … I don't know how to be the type of girl you want."

"I don't have a type." He answered quickly, honestly. She wasn't convinced. "I want _you_."

Rachel bowed her head, her hand lifting back up to the piano and pressing the note a few times before she whispered, "Why?"

Puck let out the breath he'd been holding, wishing she wouldn't ask but knowing she would. Any girl would. They always needed reassurance, even the robot Santana. Actually, especially Santana. But, especially, _especially_ girls like Rachel. Because she didn't see everything great about her. She just saw her bigger than average nose or how her body curved in different ways than "the pretty girls". She didn't see what he saw.

"Maybe I'll make a list of all the reasons one day, but there really isn't much you do that doesn't get my engine goin' in one way or another." Rachel rolled her eyes, but her lips curved up slightly. "You just need to stop worrying about Santana and all the other bitches in this school." He bumped his shoulder against hers. "You don't ever freak about bein' sexy when you're performin', but you always are."

"I'm confident on the stage."

"Well, there you go."

Rachel looked at him then, thinking about his words and how much they made sense. Finn used to tell her that guys dug girls with confidence, and Rachel had spent so much time arguing that most girls were just faking it that she hadn't really heard the truth in the statement. On stage, Rachel knew she was the best. It wasn't the most favorable mindset, but that piece of truth made her feel unstoppable. And now, with Noah by her side, maybe she'd have enough confidence to keep her head high off stage as well.

"For the record, though, I like being the only one who sees that side of you."

Rachel grinned, resting her head on his shoulder like she had done earlier in glee. Her voice was light, free of the weight of burden that once rested on her shoulders. "It would be easier if other people at least _knew_, though."

"This isn't going to be like _Run Joey Run_again, is it?"

"It wasn't _that_ bad!" She defended on a laugh, lifting her head up to make sure he was mostly joking since his voice had been so sullen. "But, no. I have a much better idea in mind. And it goes perfectly with Mr. Schuester's love assignment." Rachel quickly stood up, her pouting obviously done with as she gathered her things. "We'll need some help if we're going to perform on Wednesday, though. I'll go find Brittany. You can talk to Artie."

And just like that, she was gone, Puck following with a shake of his head considering he was her ride home. Their duet had turned out amazing, but they'd had all week to practice. He wasn't sure how they were going to pull off an entire performance in two days. But, then again, when he found himself sitting in the choir room on Wednesday afternoon, he wasn't the least been surprised that Rachel had made it happen.

"Mr. Schuester!" Rachel raised her hand, standing up and walking to the front of the class even before the teacher called on her. "Noah, Brittany, Artie and I have prepared something together for your love assignment and we'd like to perform it now."

"Oh. Sure." Mr. Schuester nodded his head, putting down the sheet music he'd been organizing and going over to sit along with the other students.

"This is more of an abridged version, and I'd personally like to dedicate it to everyone here because I know we all at one time or another have to deal with people's perceptions of us being different from how we actually are." Rachel's eyes moved to Noah for a moment, her smile widening. "Hopefully you all have someone in your life who knows the real you, though."

She nodded her head toward the band, the hard, steady beat immediately causing her to rock her shoulders. Her and Brittany came to stand behind Artie and Puck, who were both seated about ten feet from each other in the middle of the room. The two girls looked at each other hotly, Rachel starting in on the first verse while running her hands over Noah's head, shoulders, and chest.

_Your touch is so magic to me_

_The strangest things can happen_

_The way that you react to me_

_I wanna do something you can't imagine_

Brittany took the next verse, whipping her hair around and shaking her hips in perfect rhythm.

_Imagine if there was a million me's_

_Talkin' sexy to you like that_

_You think you can handle, boy_

_If I give you my squeeze_

_And I need you to push it right back_

As the chorus started, the two girls blended their voices in a high range, strutting to stand in front of each of their male leads and then quickly bending down. They moved to their hands and knees, crawling forward sexily while still singing. Then, abruptly, Brittany stood and did a very difficult back-hand spring of sorts over Artie while Rachel slid back and under Puck's chair, both the girls ending up standing behind the men like they had started.

_Baby, show me, show me what's your favorite trick_

_That you wanna use on me and I'll volunteer_

_And I'll be flowin' and goin' till clothing disappears_

_Ain't nothin' but shoes on me, oh baby_

Puck stood up then, the four singing together while performing a dance routine that focused mostly on the upper body to accommodate Artie's handicap. They eventually ended in a line, where they each popped out behind Artie after their word of the last line. Inwardly sticking it to Santana, Rachel had been love, Puck was sex, and Brittany was magic.

_All night show with just you and the crowd_

_Doin' trucks you never seen_

_And I bet that I can make you believe_

_In love and sex and magic_

_So let me drive my body around ya_

_I bet you know what I mean_

'_Cause you know that I can make you believe_

_In love and sex and magic_

By the time Artie took the next verse, Brittany had taken a seat on his lap and Rachel was sitting on Puck's. Puck used the same motions that Artie did while singing, Rachel swirling her hips like Brittany was, too.

_Everythin' ain't what it seems_

_I wave my hands and I got you_

_And you feel so fly assistin' me_

_But now it's my turn to watch you_

When Puck started singing the next verse, Rachel was really into the song, not to mention the fact that his voice shot through her like an arrow. Just like he sung, Rachel lifted her arm back and grabbed his neck, pressing her mouth near his ear and telling him how sexy she thought he was before he pushed at her back to make her bend down, just like Artie was doing for Brittany.

_I ain't gonna stop you if you wanna grab my neck_

_Talk sexy to me like that_

_Just do what I taught you, girl_

_When I give you my heat_

_And I need you to push it right back_

The two girls again harmonized into their verse, circling their heads a few times before getting up. Rachel reached back for Puck while Brittany extended her hand to Artie.

_Baby, show me, show me what's your favorite trick_

_That you wanna use on me and I'll volunteer_

_And I'll be flowin' and goin' till clothing disappears_

_Ain't nothin' but shoes on me, oh baby_

They met in the middle again and redid the dance routine from before. By this time the rest of the glee club (except Santana) had started to sing along. Finn seemed a bit shocked at the blatant display of sexuality, but Rachel wasn't embarrassed in the least. Noah had been right. She was confident on stage and bringing the two ideas together made her crave this feeling all the time.

_All night show with just you and the crowd_

_Doin' trucks you never seen_

_And I bet that I can make you believe_

_In love and sex and magic_

_So let me drive my body around ya_

_I bet you know what I mean_

'_Cause you know that I can make you believe_

_In love and sex and magic_

But, as the song slowed down, Rachel was suddenly OK with Santana's label, too. With Brittany bracing her arms on Artie's chair while pushing him slowly backward and Rachel and Puck walking in sync together with her back pressed against his chest, the four of them sung beautifully about mixing the love and the sex. And maybe that's what she and Noah were. A perfect mix.

_Oh, this is the part where we fall in love, sugar_

_Let's slow it down so we fall in love_

_But don't stop what you're doing to me_

When the last line started, Rachel and Brittany shimmied their chests, each of them turning to face the glee club and whispering the last part.

_I bet that I can make you believe_

_In love and sex and magic_

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><p><strong>Author's Note #2:<strong> The song I used is most of Justin Timberlake's/Ciara's "Love Sex and Magic". The official video was inspiration for some of the dancing, but most of it was oddly enough from my brain. Weird.


	8. Touch It

**Author's Note:** In celebration of Glee's return, I decided to update today. I want to give a quick shout out to Jann for holding my hand for part of this, and then just a general virtual high five to everyone else reading and reviewing. I love all the feedback, so PLEASE keep it coming! Thanks!

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><p>Puck walked through the halls of McKinley High in search of his petite girlfriend, and some much needed alone time. He didn't get to hang out with her yesterday after school because of baseball tryouts, and tomorrow would be the same sad song. He thought it was stupid the school still even had tryouts considering all the same kids came out every year, and no one ever got cut due to the little interest. But then again Coach Bieste was taking over since their coach from last year ended up moving. And even though Bieste already knew him and a few of the other kids from football, he could understand that she'd want to evaluate their skills as a whole. Besides, maybe with Bieste's help the baseball team would end up state champions, too.<p>

"There's my hot, little Jewish-American princess," Puck's hand grazed over her lower back, stopping to rest on her hip before he ducked his head down to kiss her exposed shoulder.

"Good morning, Noah," Rachel answered softly, tossing him a glance over her shoulder while her hands moved to secure the book she was getting out of her locker to her chest. She held onto it tightly as she turned, biting her lip when she tilted her head up to look him in the eyes. "Can you believe the weather today? I never thought I'd see the day. Seventy degrees and it's not even March. Seventy degrees in _Ohio_."

"It's hot in here alright." She pressed herself back against her locker in response to his step forward. "But it's got nothin' to do with the weather."

"Daddy says it is going to rain tomorrow and the next day and then a cold front is coming, so I think we should enjoy it while we can," she bypassed his advances with mindless chatter, slipping out of his predatory stance to begin heading toward her first class. "Perhaps I can convince Mr. Schuester to hold glee rehearsal outside. Wouldn't that be fun?"

"Yeah, sure," he responded quickly, the answer his go-to response when he wasn't really listening. "And afterward, we should go out to dinner. I've been cravin' Breadstix somethin' fierce and I'm pretty sure they have vegan options or whatever."

"Oh." Rachel stopped outside her classroom, casting a hesitant glance inside before looking back at Noah. "That sounds lovely, but I'm afraid I won't be able to accompany you this evening."

"Why the fuck not? Is there an animal sweater convention going on that's more important?" He shut his eyes tightly, wondering where the Hell his filter was lately. Just once he'd like to make it through the day without saying something to Rachel that he regretted.

"You should take your sister," she advised merrily, ignoring his insult. "She adores you and it would mean the world to her if her big brother took her out to a real restaurant for dinner."

"I don't want to take Sarah out to dinner. She sucks." Puck looked around, lowering his voice to save some face as the hallways grew heavier and heavier with their classmates. "I want to take you."

"Well, I'm busy. Another time." Rachel leaned up onto his tiptoes, kissing his cheek softly before turning on her heel and walking into the classroom. Puck watched her with a scowl as she took a seat at her desk, shaking his head before leaving to go to his own class. The sting of rejection only intensified when Rachel skipped lunch to work in the choir room, and he couldn't concentrate during sixth period because she was sitting at the desk next to him but barely broke her gaze from the front of the classroom to even look at him.

Glee was a whirlwind of activity and then she was gone. The next day, they ate lunch together but he had baseball try outs, so they didn't really get any alone time again. He'd tried not to let himself get too bent out of shape, but ever since their sexy performance in glee, things had started to shift in Rachel's favor at school. And even though he'd been used for popularity before, Rachel had never done that and he wanted to keep that streak alive. Plus, no matter how wussy it sounded, he missed her too much to continue being mad, so Thursday morning he approached her locker once more, hoping for better results this time.

"There's a pre-screening of some movie at the theater tonight. Scored us some tickets." He snapped his fingers and made what looked like one ticket split into two. "I say we get there early, sit in the back and make out the whole time. Cool?"

Rachel frowned, pushing some hair back behind her ear. "I can't, Noah. Not tonight, I'm sorry."

"Fine." He brushed past her, not in the mood for whatever excuse she had today. For the next day, he seethed just trying to figure out what was going on. He hadn't done anything stupid in like, days. Well, okay. There was that thing on Sunday when his mom and Rachel teamed up on him and he'd called them crazy. And yesterday he was so tired after baseball try outs that he literally fell to his bed and slept when he said he would call her, but that wasn't his fault. She'd started the thing this morning on the drive to school, so that didn't count either.

Rachel was at her locker Friday after school, gathering the books she would need over the weekend when she felt him approach her. She closed her locker and looked up at him, her smile fading when she studied his expression. She could see his jaw tightening and loosening uncontrollably, his backpack strap clenched tightly in his hand. His eyes seemed darker because of his scowl, and she actually found herself swallowing nervously.

"What's the matter?"

"You tell me," he growled, his voice low because of the emotion and not because of their surroundings. The school cleared out quicker than usual on Fridays, and Rachel had been late getting out of her last class. The hallway was practically deserted. "Are you avoiding me?"

"What?" Rachel gasped, her lips turning down into a frown. "Of course not."

"You've been dodging me left and right." He didn't back down, not letting her genuine surprise deter him. "I know I've been busy with baseball, but I've been tryin' and you just … keep blowin' me off."

Rachel couldn't help the lopsided smile that appeared, her long brown hair cascading away from her face when she tilted her head back to look at him. "You're a lot more clingy than I would have suspected, Noah."

"Look," he snarled, "if you want out … if I'm not what the great Rachel Berry expected, then at least sack up and tell me to my face." He shook his head, disgust in his voice. Here he was trying to be a little more mature in this relationship than he'd _ever_ been and she was _laughing_ at him? Fuck that noise. "Makin' me chase you around like some sick, pathetic _loser_ just for shits and giggles is … well, it's a bitch move is what it is."

"Noah, I …"

"No. You know what?" He shook his head, backing away from her a few paces before turning completely around. Then, over his shoulder, he tossed back toward her, "I'm busy."

Rachel watched him walk down the hall and out of the front double doors of the school, her mouth slightly open and her eyes refusing to blink. She wanted to run after him, wanted to yell to him that he had it all wrong, but for the first time in her whole life, she couldn't find her voice. She couldn't find the right words even in her vast vocabulary. How do you tell someone something you're not even sure how to say?

Puck inhaled and exhaled sharp breaths, seeing red as he practically jogged away from the school. He took long, hard strides across the street, down two blocks before turning and walking five more. His mom had dropped him off at school today because she needed the truck, but his new car was in the shop just another few blocks away. He picked it up and drove it to the convenience store, loitering outside the doors and trying to look pathetic enough that someone might buy him beer.

It wasn't much of a stretch considering how he felt. He really didn't want to care, but with a little time to himself and some separation, Puck was worried he may have overreacted. Maybe it was true what they said – if you spend enough time with someone else you'll start to rub off on each other. Rachel had it easy because she got to loosen up and start to resemble something cool, but Puck … he wasn't handling this relationship stuff well. It was all so overwhelming, like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.

Before, it was all about him. Whatever he wanted to do, he did. He didn't have to answer to anyone, didn't care what other people thought. He could make his own decisions and the consequences be damned. Now it was all about going to class and making the grades. It was about baseball and glee. He had to be a good brother and a good son. He had to keep a job and keep his girlfriend.

It was too hard.

"Hey, Puckerman." Puck lifted his sagged head, his eyes resting on the lean frame of a woman twice his age, maybe closer to three. "You sure are a sight for sore eyes."

"Hi, Mrs. Livingstone. How's your pool?"

The older woman smiled coyly, her heels clicking on the concrete as she stepped closer. "We're hoping to open it sooner this year, thanks to this freak weather." Her tongue swept slowly over her bottom lip, her eyes moving to Puck's mouth. "I hope you'll be available again this summer."

"I'm thinking about charging a little more this year." The sentence was out of his mouth before he could think to censor himself, the bitter taste it left on his tongue nauseous. Did it used to feel like this?

"It's always worth it," she purred.

And that's when Puck realized that it was easier not to care, but he couldn't stop. Opportunities abound, he couldn't keep himself from thinking about Rachel. Seeing the look of horror on her face from earlier, hearing the desperation in her voice right before he left. He knew she cared about him, and he cared enough about her to not mess up everything they'd worked so hard to get. Not without a valid reason, anyway.

"Sorry, I've gotta go." Puck quickly moved to his car, falling into the seat and turning the key in the ignition. He sighed as the cougar stalked off, back to her pimped out BMW, and he decided just to go home.

"You're home early," Mrs. Puckerman remarked as soon as he walked through the door. "For someone that told me he was too busy to go to temple tonight, I didn't expect to see you until _much_ later."

"Sorry, Ma." Puck came into the living room, rustling his little sister's hair and bending down to kiss his mom on the cheek. "I'll go tomorrow, OK? I'm beat." She answered in a noncommittal response, Puck climbing the stairs and walking toward his room without another word. Without holding onto all the anger he'd been carrying with him through the week, Puck was suddenly exhausted. He literally used all his weight to push against the door, falling back against it to close it.

Rachel stood nervously from the old chair on the opposite side of his room, her hands wringing in front of her as she waited for him to open his eyes. When he did, she actually gasped, her heartbeat racing as he stayed rooted to his spot by the door. She could feel his eyes moving over her body, noting the black leotard and the pink tutu before settling his gaze back on her eyes. They were only a few feet apart, but at that moment it felt closer to miles, light years even.

"The thing is," she began softly, her eyes not daring to lift from their downcast gaze. "I put everything I had into my relationship with Finn. I ignored all my other goals and ambitions and … and when we broke up, I lost everything. I had nothing to fall back on because I-I stopped being … _me_." She refilled her lungs quickly, knowing better than to pause for very long at that moment. Puck hated hearing about her and Finn, though she didn't know that it was mostly because it reminded him that they'd almost never gotten their chance together. "I cared very deeply for Finn, but I think … I think I'm already falling in love with you and what if … if we …"

Puck closed the space between the two of them in two long strides, sweeping her into his arms almost at the exact moment she collapsed into his embrace. She was weightless as he brought them down to his mattress, his lips finding hers in a languid, paced kiss. Her mouth opened up to his on a sob of joy, her tongue sliding across his for a few moments before Puck pulled back slowly.

"You taste like dip," she joked softly, wiping under her eye to catch the lone tear that had fallen down her cheek. He leaned down to press a kiss to the spot where it had fallen, lifting back up and looking into her eyes.

"Don't stop doin' what you love." Her back pressed against the mattress, only half his weight on her but the full weight of his gaze when he leaned into his forearm and looked down at her. "Just don't stop doin' me, either."

Rachel nodded her head desperately, her eyes watering up again as she inhaled a shaky breath. Puck was abrasive at best, but he also seemed to have a knack for knowing when and how to say the right thing. She guessed it was partially because he was so charming, but she also liked to think it was because he cared enough about her feelings to hate to see her sad.

"Ballet started back up."

"Obviously," he said, both their gazes moving down her frame. His left hand was drawing lazy circles on the slippery fabric of her leotard, his fingers brushing over the loose, flowing fabric of the tutu.

"There's a recital in a few weeks." She bit her lip, lifting her eyes away from his hand and up to his gaze. "I'd like to invite you."

"I'll check my schedule. See if I ain't doin' anything better."

Rachel rolled her eyes, her smile spreading wide just at the warm tone he used. She closed her eyes and exhaled a long, slow breath, letting herself get lost in the subtle feel of his fingertips brushing over her stomach and arms. She felt his breath wisp across her neck and chest, his lips ghosting over her forehead and cheeks. He was being so careful, so patient, and she could tell it was killing him. But, what he might not have realized was that it was killing her, too. Ever since the thing with Santana, when he'd effortlessly boosted her confidence, it had been almost impossible for her to remember why they were waiting.

"Touch me, Noah," she croaked out in a timid voice.

"Wh-what?"

She bit her lip, but made sure to keep looking at him. She was getting better about that, about not shying away from sex. There was something about him that didn't just relax her, but gave her the confidence to approach those types of conversations with more maturity than she used to. Maybe it was because he never hid from it, never made her feel wrong or dirty about anything.

"You said you wouldn't do it again until I said it was cool and … and I-I'm saying it's cool."

Puck groaned before crashing his lips against hers, the hand of the arm holding him up cradling her neck to keep her closer. His other hand moved from her stomach up her arm, slowing moving over her shoulder and then back down the underside of her arm. When he reached her hand, he interlaced their fingers together and pressed both their hands into the bed, breaking away from the kiss only to suction his lips to her neck.

Rachel whined into the new contact, her right leg shifting to lock over the limb he had settled between her, causing him to lean into her harder. Each of them moaned, Rachel more so when Puck's lips moved from her neck to her collarbone. She released his hand and brought it up to his jaw, pulling his face back up so she could kiss him again. With his hand free, Rachel had hoped he would finally go to that once forbidden place she had finally given him permission to travel. But he continued to move purposefully across her body, avoiding the very place she ached for him the most.

"Please."

Her eyes shut even tighter, her back arching up into him, urging him. She'd never felt like this before, but if she'd ever been close, it was when she was with him. It wasn't just about her knowing he had a soft side, or trusting him. Those things could have been ignored. She could have pushed that stuff aside and focused on other things, other people. But she couldn't stop her body from craving him. It was uncontrollable, the desire she felt only when he looked at her, when he touched her.

"Noah, _please_."

Puck gripped at Rachel's bent knee, three fingers digging into the leg of her leotard and the other two pressed against bare skin. She hooked her leg even higher, his hand falling to the curve of her ass as he thrust into her involuntarily. Rachel moaned again, releasing his head and reaching down to grab his hand. And in a flash, she moved it off her butt and placed it on her chest, arching into him again the second he'd made contact.

If possible, he kissed her even more hungrily, his head so cloudy at that moment that he sort of forgot there was a person underneath all his passion. But it wasn't just any person. It was Rachel, and she felt _amazing_ underneath him. Her nipples hardened at his attention and he could feel the nails from her other hand digging into his side.

But he could feel so much more than what was under his fingertips. It wasn't just her responding to his touch; he could feel her body _reacting _to him. He so desperately wanted to see how much more of a reaction he could provoke, but he also didn't want this to just _happen_. He loved that her movements seemed involuntary, so out of her control. But he didn't want this to be like every other time. He wanted this to be a choice. Her choice.

Puck let his hand drift off her breast, his fingers curling around her lithe waist while his thumb moved softly over her rib cage. He slowed down the attack of his kisses, changing the tempo from feverish to controlled, ending with one long pull of her. Their eyes opened a few seconds after their lips parted, their deep, heavy breaths mingling between them.

"I should take you home before your fathers send the search party." He tried to disguise the lust from his voice, but she heard it loud and clear. It was the same thing screaming inside her own head, the reason her body was humming right then. She licked her lips, finally nodding her head in agreement; neither of them moved.

"Will I see you tomorrow?"

He smiled when she wrapped her arms more tightly around him, her leg falling from his waist but staying intertwined with his as she rested her head on his chest. They'd made it past their first real fight, on to the next one. "Now who's being clingy?"


	9. Flashlights & Bras Aren't For Studying

**Author's Note:** Well this started as sort of a filler chapter trying to move the story along, but then it got a little out of hand. Thanks for that, Jann. You are my savior. To everyone reading and reviewing, I can't thank you enough. If I could, I'd update every day and dedicate every single chapter to every single one of you. Y'all rock!

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><p>Rachel, Kurt, and Mercedes all sat around the Berry dining room table with their books spread out, notes and flashcards filling in the random gaps. The silence in the room was palpable, the only sounds coming from the antique grandfather's clock in the foyer and the soft squeak of Rachel's pink highlighter as she ran it from one sentence to the next. They'd been studying for close to two hours now, the sun's descent long lost on the trio in their attempt to cram as much information into their heads tonight as humanly possible. The coming week was going to be tough for both schools, each having a long list of tests and projects due before the end of their respective grading periods.<p>

When Rachel flipped the page of her textbook, the sound broke through her eardrums and let in the other more subtle noises in the room. She could hear Mercedes tapping her nails against the table, heard the soft moan of the refrigerator in the kitchen. There was white noise from outside, like the swoosh of cars driving by the house at speeds above the residential limit or the rhythmic sound of the crickets. But, most notably, she heard the distinct but familiar sound of Kurt humming softly to himself. And it wasn't just any song. It was _their_ song.

Rachel stifled her laughter and waited for the perfect moment to jump in. "You wanna be, a loser like me," she crooned, giggling quietly when Kurt's head snapped up. He looked over at Mercedes, who took her nose out of her book long enough to grin at him. "Busted."

"It's catchy." Kurt rolled his eyes, using his index finger and thumb to fix the hair on his forehead.

"Must be why we won," Mercedes taunted, letting her loud, belly laugh rumble into the open area. The friends had all had a little more than a week to get past the awkwardness that might have come out of New Directions taking the title at regionals. Kurt, Blaine, and the rest of the Warblers had all been very gracious in their support, letting Rachel and the rest of the members know that they were rooting for them to win in New York as well. And even though Rachel only half-meant it, everyone in New Directions had told the guys of Dalton that they wished they could have tied again so everyone could go to New York.

"Have you given any more consideration to returning to McKinley?" Rachel asked suddenly.

"I thought we were here to study," Kurt deflected, scooting his history book just a little closer.

"You know you've missed us," Mercedes teased, though there was a lot of truth in that statement.

Not only had Kurt missed her and the other people in the glee club, he'd missed _the glee club_. He and Blaine were finally together, but he wasn't too close to the situation that he couldn't see the faults with the Warblers. He missed the open attitude of New Directions. He missed the underdog feel that seemed to drive them to do better. He even missed Mr. Schuester and his crazy assignments that were like an episode of _Full House_ in the way that they always made sense by the end.

"I can't just up and leave," he mumbled. "My dad and Carol sacrificed a lot for me to attend Dalton. I can't just throw it all away."

"But your grading period is almost over. Since you started in the middle of the year, they likely pay for each grading period separately. It would be a clean break."

Kurt groaned. Seriously, did Rachel have to know _everything_? "I can't come back. Nothing's changed."

"That's not true." Mercedes used her pencil to point at Rachel. "Berry and Puckerman have been hot and heavy for almost two months now." Rachel blushed. "And they brought back the tots, too."

"Oh, why didn't you say so sooner?"

Rachel's mouth opened to protest Kurt's sarcasm, but closed when she heard the doorbell ring about five times followed by some loud laughing and talking. The trio at the dining room all shared a look before shuffling out of their chairs and walking to the foyer. As soon as the door closed, Rachel, Kurt, and Mercedes each locked eyes with one member of the three unannounced guests, Puck, Mike, and Tina.

"Honey, I'm home," Puck announced cheerily, moving the duffel bag slung over his shoulder out in front of him. "And I brought flashlights. It's wicked awesome outside tonight."

Rachel stared at him blankly. "I … I don't even know what that means."

"Flashlight tag," he said, as if that should have been obvious. He unzipped the flap on the bag, digging his hand inside to grab one of the flashlights and tossing it out toward Mercedes.

"Isn't that … a little juvenile?" Rachel asked, her eyes following his next toss. Kurt fumbled the heavy metal and it fell to the floor with a rattling clang. He sheepishly bent down to pick it up, Rachel shaking her head at him before looking back to Puck. "Not to mention entirely absurd?"

"Like you're doing anything better?"

"As a matter of fact, we are." Rachel pointed back toward the dining room, where their study materials were still scattered throughout the area. "Mercedes and I are preparing for Monday's big geometry exam while Kurt is studying for his history test."

"Lame."

"Mike and Tina are here to work on the science project we're doing together," Mercedes stated as she stepped forward, handing her flashlight back to Puck.

"Really?" Puck looked over at Mike, who just shrugged in response before finally moving away from the door along with Tina. When Puck noticed the Asian couple following him, he figured it was because he was the man. He didn't think Mike and Tina already made plans to come to Rachel's house.

"Noah, I told you we would be studying all night." Rachel scrunched up her nose as Mike walked past, her eyes following him and noting the discoloration of his shirt. He looked like he just finished running a marathon. Puck looked equally spent, his plain gray sleeveless shirt saturated with sweat around the collar. Apparently their pickup game of basketball had been a bit more extensive than she anticipated.

"You did?" She scowled at him. "I remember you sayin' your fathers would be out of town. Everything after that is kind of a blur."

"Well, we're studying." Rachel put her foot down, turning on her heel and heading back to the dining room with Mercedes and Kurt following a second later. The trio resumed their positions at the table, all three of their necks slacking forward as their eyes once again trained on the words in the textbooks. Eventually Mike and Tina pulled up chairs, the former wearing new clothes that must have been in his bag; far more appropriate than _flashlights_.

Puck also changed and then stalked around the house for a few minutes, avoiding the dining room but not really knowing what else to do. Rachel's house was huge, but it was also really boring. They had a formal living room and then, like, a regular one. He was always afraid to be anywhere but Rachel's room or the kitchen since he was such a slob. No doubt her one dad would throw a huge hissy fit if he left a speck of dirt somewhere. The dining room might be the safest place. Lots of witnesses.

"This sucks," he whined while unceremoniously falling into the chair next to Rachel. He looked at her book and squinted at all the pink highlighting, shaking his head and looking back up around the table. "One game, guys. It will be fun."

"Had I know your affinity for such a childish game, I might not have been so afraid of you during middle school and at the start of high school."

"Watch it, Hummel." Puck glared at Kurt and Rachel quickly swatted him across the chest.

"What did I tell you about being nice?"

"I thought you were just talkin' about in the sack."

Rachel blushed profusely but did her best to continue with her original thought. "We're trying to convince Kurt to come back to McKinley, _remember_?"

"Come back or I'll kill you," Puck growled, earning another hit from Rachel. "Fuck, B. That's how I convince people!"

"Can we not talk about this?" Kurt sighed, looking back down at his book. The table was quiet for another ten minutes or so (a record for Puck at that point) before Kurt shoved his history book toward the middle of the table on a huff. "My eyes are starting to cross," he lamented, gingerly touching his fingers to the skin under his eyes, trying to circulate the blood and get back some feeling in the tender muscles. "I need a break."

"Second that," Mercedes said, closing her book entirely.

"Flashlight tag it is!" Puck cheered.

"No. Absolutely not." Rachel used her index finger to point sternly at him, then shifted the digit down to point at her book. "We're studying."

"No ya ain't. You're just tryin' to get Hummel to come back to glee club." Puck looked over at said former member. "You could save us all a lot of headaches and just cave already."

"As I've explained to my two girls here, I can't just _go_ back. Nothing has changed." Kurt lifted his hand in protest to Mercedes' mouth opening. "Aside from the ban on tater tots being lifted."

"You talkin' Karofsky? Because you don't have to worry about that shit."

"Noah's right, Kurt. Ever since the football game, things have been different."

"They won't be for me. You … you guys don't understand."

"We'll protect you," Puck admitted in that overly masculine way that shot right through Rachel. For a split second, she almost tossed out the whole studying plan. Not for flashlight tag, but she was pretty sure he wouldn't have complained her change of plans. "All the other football guys have been real cool since the game, so it's just Karofsky. And if he even looks at you wrong, we'll make him pay."

Kurt blinked a few times in surprise, his eyes drifting from Puck's to Mercedes'. Perhaps she was right. Some things had changed, and one of them was sitting in front of him prepared to defend him from the one person Puck used to help torment Kurt. And next to him was the other main thing that had changed, no longer chasing his now stepbrother but instead swooning at Puck's barbaric display of honor.

"Ah, Hell to the no." Mercedes glared at her best friend, the pieces coming together. "Tell me this isn't about white boy."

"It's not about Blaine." Kurt shook his head quickly from the left to the right. "I think if I did come back to McKinley, he would actually come, too."

"Excuse me?" Rachel leaned forward anxiously, lifting almost entirely out of her seat. While she valued her spot at the top and didn't enjoy competition, Rachel knew she couldn't win Nationals by herself. Getting Kurt back was step one in solidifying the glee club's talent reached optimal heights, but adding Blaine to the mix … they'd be so much closer to what she envisioned during the halftime performance at the championship game. They'd be a force, just like Vocal Adrenaline. But _better_. "Blaine Warbler would really join New Directions?"

"Anderson." Kurt rolled his eyes. "His last name is Anderson. And, yes, I mean … we've talked about it. Ever since you guys won regionals and have been pestering me about coming back. He's only really gone to school in the private sector and he thought it would be fun to attend public school. Plus, now that we are dating …"

"Is his cute friend Riley coming, too?" Mercedes asked before biting her lip coyly.

"No one is coming."

"That's not somethin' you usually hear a gay guy say."

"Can we just study?" Kurt moaned, ignoring Puck's crass comment and Mercedes' lovelorn hope. He'd introduced her to Riley at Breadstix during the Warblers' Valentine's Day performance and he'd been playing messenger between the two ever since. It blew his mind that in an age of texting and online communication, two young people still couldn't find it in themselves to leave him out of their budding love lives. Then again, he didn't want to be left out of the gossip, so he never complained, either.

"How could Blaine even come to McKinley?"

Kurt sighed, not even knowing why he bothered to pretend to study. "He has an aunt that lives in the district." He lifted his eyes up to Rachel's. "Could you at least pretend to care more about getting _me_ back than getting Blaine to join?"

"Oh don't be silly, Kurt. You know you are important to me. To the team. Your voice alone would propel us into the finals. But, adding Blaine …"

"What will it take?" Puck said finally, trying to ignore the enthusiasm dripping off of Rachel. He could already tell she had made up her mind (what Rachel wants, Rachel gets), and he was sick of beating around the bush. This was Hummel for J-Dawg's sake. "What do we need to make happen to get you to come back?"

"Are we negotiating?"

"Well, I can either beat the crap out of Dave or you. You choose."

Rachel gasped in horror, swatting Puck in the chest again. Kurt's eyes widened, Mercedes and Tina giggled to themselves, and then Mike did the unthinkable. He thought about it logically instead of the joke it obviously was. And then he opened his mouth.

"You can't beat anyone up, dude. You're already suspended from the team. If you get in a fight, Coach will kick you off in a heartbeat!"

The silence echoed in the room, expressions altering quickly. Mercedes and Tina stopped laughing, mimicking Kurt's wide-eyed expression. Mike looked very similar, but paired it with a thin line for his mouth and slowly backing his torso up to straighten his posture. Puck, who had been relatively calm before, entirely tensed and glared at Mike with fire in his eyes. And Rachel, well she was the scariest of them all.

"Suspended? What is he talking about?"

"You know, I just forgot we have somewhere to be." Mike grabbed Tina's arm, pulling her up along with him then quickly out of the room. They left all the stuff they'd brought for their project with Mercedes, Tina barely able to offer a goodbye wave before Mike pushed her out of the door and into his car. The urgency wasn't lost on Rachel, nor was Puck going to just forget that his friend had threw him under the bus and then left his mangled carcass to be eaten by a raving mad wolf. Rachel was the wolf.

"Noah?" Rachel questioned again, prying his eyes off the space where they'd last been able to see Mike and Tina. "What's going on?"

"Blaine just sent a 911 text. Apparently dinner with his parents isn't going accordingly to plan. I have to go save him." Kurt stood up, gathering his books while Mercedes looked on helplessly. He offered her a lifeline. "Why don't you come with me so you can help convince Blaine to come to McKinley?"

"Does that mean you're coming back?" Mercedes asked, but then gasped on her inhale when Kurt shot her a death-ray stare while also making eyes toward Rachel and Puck. "We can talk about it in the car. Bye guys!"

Puck groaned as his last two allies exited almost as quickly as the first two, much of their stuff also left in the wake. He eventually dragged his eyes to Rachel, unsurprised to see much of the confusion was now replaced with anger. She wasn't a very patient person, and she also didn't like feeling like she was the last one to know something. But, in his defense, he was hoping she'd never find out. So, that made it better, right?

"It's not a big deal," he prefaced while walking away, definitely needing a change of scenery. Rachel was the type of crazy that he could see ending up with a book being tossed at his head and that shit wasn't cool. "Mike wasn't supposed to say anything."

"Well, which is it?" She demanded, following him with her hands on her hips. "Not a big deal or something so big that you are purposely keeping it from me?"

"The first," he answered quickly, smart enough to know the second option didn't sound good. Unfortunately, he wasn't smart enough to plan his escape out. Instead, he'd managed to put himself in a room that only had one exit, which was heavily guarded by one scary girlfriend. "Coach is just usin' me as an example. Blowin' it way out of proportion."

"So you're suspended?" He nodded. "For how long?"

"Till she realizes it was a bitch move." Rachel didn't look amused. "I just have to talk some teachers into giving me an extension. Then it will take too long for them to see my GPA is too low and I'll get to finish the season."

"If you actually put as much effort into studying as you did trying to screw the system, you might not be in this situation." Rachel turned around and left, her heavy, determined steps echoing throughout the house until she reappeared. "You're studying."

"Fuck that noise." Puck shook his head, crossing his arms defiantly over his chest. "It's Saturday. I'm not wasting it studying."

"Waste this Saturday or waste all the others working as a gas station attendant down the road." Rachel shoved the book into his chest, not even waiting for him to grab it before walking away. It fell with a thud onto the ground, Puck in hot pursuit.

"What the Hell is that supposed to mean?" He huffed, following her upstairs when she didn't even pause to acknowledge him. "You think I'm a Lima Loser?"

"I think you're _acting_ like one," she tossed over her shoulder, trying to shut her bedroom door in his face but failing as he barreled through. She turned to face him, mimicking his stance with her arms crossed over her chest and her face stern. "All you need to do is study and then …"

"I don't need to study!" He grabbed the book she was holding out of her hands, turning to a random chapter in the middle and finding a practice test at the end of the unit. "Ask me anything."

"Fine." Her voice was much calmer than his, but somehow possessed an equal amount of force. "For every answer you get wrong, you owe me an _hour_ of studying."

"Then for every answer I get right, you have to strip."

Rachel hiccupped in response, then glowered at him. "Fine."

"Fine!" Puck was so upset that he barely realized what was going on. Did his super hot girlfriend just willing agree to take off her clothes? Did he honestly agree to an hour of studying for every question he got wrong? What book had he even given her? Was he _in_ that class? He sat down on her bed, wiping his suddenly sweaty palms across his jeans.

"Here's one." Rachel cleared her throat, using her index finger to keep her focus on the question. "Which colony required each community of 50 or more families to provide a teacher of reading and writing? Pennsylvania, Massachusetts, Virginia, Maryland, or Rhode Island?"

Puck blinked once. "Rhode Island?"

"Are you asking me or telling me?"

He scowled. "Rhode Island."

"That's one hour." Puck clenched his jaw. "It was Massachusetts. Under the Articles of Confederation, the United States' central government had no power to what? A, levy taxes; B, make treaties; C, declare war; D, request troops from states; or E, amend the Articles?"

"War. C."

"A. Two hours."

"History is stupid!" Puck snarled, leaning forward to rip the book out of her hands. "Get another book."

Rachel rolled her eyes, walking out of her room and all the way back downstairs. She grabbed her math book as well as the biology book that Mike had left, trudging back up the steps and into her room. She presented each book out in front to Puck, allowing him to choose the subject. He flicked a finger against the hard cover of the math book, surprising both of them.

"Geometry, for three hours." He glared at her mockery, but remained silent. "If a circle has a diameter of 8, then what is its circumference?"

Puck waited for her to give him options, but when she just kept staring at him he realized he was just supposed to know the answer. He groaned quietly and dropped his back to the mattress, staring up at the ceiling as he tried to remember random things he'd learned throughout the year. He'd started going to class more and more at the beginning of the new year, but he still didn't always pay attention. And he hated math, even though he actually understood most of it.

"Do I have to be exact?" He asked as he sat back up. Rachel shook her head, pressing the open book to her chest. "S'like 25 ish." When Rachel's mouth hung open, he couldn't help but smile. "Yea. That's right. Take it off."

"It's one question, Noah." Rachel rolled her eyes, removing the shirt she was wearing over her camisole. "Let's look for something a little harder."

"Fire away," he answered arrogantly, feeling a burst of confidence after getting one right.

"What's the formula for finding cosine?"

"Uh, length times width times height?" Rachel shook her head from side to side, replacing the shirt she'd just taken off. "Hey, wait! What the Hell? I earned that."

"And now you lost it. Want to earn it back?" Puck paused for a second, his eyes trailing down her frame before he nodded enthusiastically. Rachel nodded too, trying but failing to hide her smile. "Good."

They continued on back and forth for nearly an hour. They went through a couple more math questions (breaking out pencil and paper so he could do more complicated problems), discussed one of the books he was supposed to read for English, and then they talked about health class. By the time they'd gotten to the biology book Rachel brought up, Puck owed her twelve hours of studying and Rachel was finally in just her bra and some short shorts she'd had hidden under the workout pants she had been wearing.

"OK. Here's one." Rachel tried to get her voice not to shake, but without all the anger bubbling on the surface, she now felt much more vulnerable than she had intended. This was supposed to be about him picking up his grades. About him not getting kicked off the baseball team. Now she was practically naked. How did he do this to her? "What mineral is responsible for the formation of hemoglobin? Iron, calcium, potassium, or magnesium?"

Sometime during the pop quiz, Puck had moved to rest his back against Rachel's headboard, lounging on the bed while Rachel remained by her desk. While he'd certainly gotten a few answers right and been rewarded for those, her appearance was more distracting than he anticipated. Whenever she got down to just her bra, he would instantly miss the next question and she'd be covered up again. It was like a sick joke in the way it never failed.

"Iron?"

"Is that your final answer?"

Puck hesitated, remembering the last time he answered vaguely that she'd tricked him into thinking he was right. She might be doing it again, or maybe she wanted him to think that so he'd change his answer because really he was right. Puck closed his eyes, forcing himself not to think about her honey skin and just try to remember the stupid lesson where he knew they had talked about this crap. It was just a couple of weeks ago. Sam and him were goofing around playing paper football. Artie was next to them doodling in his notes – something about Iron Man turning into Iron Goblin. Puck groaned. Could that be the same thing?

"Yeah. Iron."

Rachel was torn between being happy that Noah had gotten another answer right and being completely terrified to expose herself to him entirely. Even in their make out sessions, which certainly had gotten more and more passionate since she'd stopped being a hands-free zone (Puck's words), they'd always kept barriers between them. He'd had his shirt off before, but she'd never been down to more than just a tank top. Now she was already standing in front of him in just her bra, and her hands were reaching back to unclasp the tiny snaps so she'd be completely topless in front of him.

"Correct," she responded shakily, her hands trembling as the flimsy material loosened from her shoulders and then fell off her arms and onto the floor. Puck scooted back to the edge of the bed, Rachel stepping back in response. "What are you doing?"

"I think even you know the answer to that one." Puck stood up, but was met by Rachel's extended arm keeping him away. "Come on. I _need_ to touch you."

"You need to study." She tried to sound firm, but her voice wavered. She felt overly exposed and seeing/hearing his reaction squelched her fears but it did nothing to hinder her sudden desire.

"I ain't gonna be able to answer any more questions with your tits hanging out." Puck tore his own T-shirt from his body, stepping close to her as he said, "Now we're even."

He captured her lips swiftly, his arms wrapping tightly around her lithe waist. She moaned at the feel of his bare skin on hers, completely forgetting to reprimand him for his vulgarity as the new sensation coursed through her veins. His fingers curled over her ribs and he pulled her flush against him, causing Rachel's feet to lift from the ground. Then, he swung them around, both of them falling onto the mattress with a soft thud.

"How'd you get so good in math?" Rachel asked breathlessly, her eyes rolling in the back of her head when he used one hand to fondle her left breast and his mouth to tease her right.

"I _am_ a Jew, Rach." He chuckled, pressing soft kisses down the valley of her breasts all the way to her stomach. He let his tongue dip into her belly button before moving back up, kissing her soundly on the lips before leaning back slightly. "Are you really going to make me study for twelve hours?"

"It's important, Noah," she said, her eyes open and completely focused. They were still pressed together intimately, and the moment was actually even more intense now that it was mixed with serious conversation. Here they were, bare chest to bare chest, and now they were really baring it all. "Not just for baseball or being able to stay on glee, but …" she trailed off, seeing the shock in his face. Puck hadn't thought about not being able to qualify for glee. It was an extra-curricular activity just like baseball, though, and required the same GPA to be a member. "You could do so much better than this place."

Puck's eyes were completely centered on hers, which was only a little disconcerting considering he had a topless girlfriend underneath him for the first time ever. But, right then, the words that had come out of her mouth were just as beautiful, and he had to take a moment to process them. Rachel was always thinking long term, whereas he never really thought out things much. He'd always been sort of a live in the moment kind of guy, not really paying much attention to the big picture. But, with her … she could be his long term.

"Right now the only thing I want to do is in this place, though." Rachel started to admonish him for ruining the moment, but he quickly covered her mouth with his. He let his tongue slide softly over her top lip and then the bottom, plunging the tender flesh into her moist cavern as it opened wider on a sigh. She rested her hands flat on each of his shoulder blades, pulling his body closer to hers and moaning at the feel of his warm skin pressed into hers. She knew he'd have to leave soon before his mother started to worry, and the longer they spent alone together would just lead to trouble.

But, she thought as she responded to his kiss and relished in the feel of him on top of her, maybe like he needed to start thinking further ahead, Rachel needed to appreciate the here and now.


	10. Make the Spare

**Author's Note:** In the spirit of bowing down to all you guys' unwavering support and the need for some good news when my weekend is going to be one terrible thing after the next, I've decided to update again. I probably won't get another chapter up until later on Monday, so we'll consider this my little egg left on the front yard for Easter. LOL.

Seriously, thanks for all the reads and reviews and I hope you enjoy this chapter. It is completely fluffy and just a good, fun time ... moving the story along without doing much other than hopefully putting a smile on everyone's faces. Let me know what you think! Thanks!

**Edited: Major fail on my part. Hopefully I didn't lose anyone to my stupidity!**

* * *

><p>Puck sped through the streets surrounding the prestigious campus, nearly clipping one of the students as Rachel jostled beside him. He could see her scowl in the corner of his eye, and simply turned the corner harder in an attempt to deepen it. It didn't make any sense considering Rachel wasn't exactly sexually forthcoming when she was pissed, but he couldn't help but like getting her riled up. Maybe it was because the two were so physically similar, what with the smoldering eyes and the flushed skin.<p>

Or maybe he was just an ass.

"Get it out of your system now, Noah, because you can't very well drive like that with Blaine's belongings in the back."

"Why not?" He scoffed. "Ain't my shit."

"Blaine is about to be our teammate not to mention the fact that he is already our friend and…"

"He's your friend," Puck clarified.

"What's mine is yours," she responded lightly, ignoring the fact that he'd interrupted her.

"Then gimmie your underwear."

Rachel gasped, releasing her arms from their crossed position to swat at his chest, his previous laughter ending in a low grunt. She barely waited for him to put the truck in park before she unbuckled her seatbelt and stormed out, doing her best to slam the passenger door but the heavy metal weighed almost as much as she did. This wasn't her first time on the Dalton Academy campus, so she walked far ahead of him on the stone pathway leading to one of the dormitories.

Puck jogged a little faster when she disappeared into one of the buildings, relieved to see her waiting inside for the elevator. He wasn't exactly sure which room was Blaine's, but he was already warned that it was on the fifth floor. And considering he was going to have to haul down a futon all five of those flights, he was really hoping Rachel wasn't going to pull her fitness guru crap. She always seemed to opt for stairs in lieu of the much more convenient methods, like the escalator at the mall, which was really getting annoying.

"You mad?" He asked sweetly, enveloping her from behind as they stepped onto the elevator. Rachel pushed out a breath, looking at him over her shoulder. "Come on. It's not like it's any secret I'm disgusting."

"No, I suppose not." She rolled her eyes, turning in his embrace. She really did wish she could pretend to be angry at him for longer than a full minute. "I'm already quite accustomed to your crass attempts at humor."

At that moment, he let his hands fall from her hips to her butt. "Did you say ass?"

"You're incorrigible!" Rachel pushed against his chest, moving him maybe an inch while the rest of her weight went into her retreat as the elevator doors opened. She turned right and passed about three doors before standing in front of the one marked 505. All it took was one knock and the door was swinging open, Kurt's familiar face greeting the two of them.

"You're early."

"Noah is of the mind that the speed limit is a recommendation," Rachel said as she entered the room, her gaze back on Puck, who was grinning while mocking her – much to Kurt and Blaine's amusement. "Is everything all set?"

"Yes, though I find it extremely disheartening to learn that my entire life can be packed away in two cars, one if it weren't for the futon."

"It would take two cars just to hold all the shit Hummel uses on his face," Puck joked.

"That cream I gave you worked wonders, naysayer," Kurt tossed right back, bending down to grab one of the remaining boxes. "Most of the stuff is in my car downstairs already. Rachel, if you'll grab that lamp over there and then just help Puck and Blaine with the door, we'll be all set to leave."

"So that makes it official." Puck walked toward the futon, mentally taking in the dimensions and thinking of a strategy for getting the large piece of furniture through the door and down the stairs. "Although I'm not really surprised."

"Don't listen to him, Kurt. He's in a mood today." Rachel rolled her eyes, grabbing the lamp.

"What? I don't get it." Kurt frowned, adjusting the box he was holding from one arm to the other. "Are you guys doing that couple thing, with the inside jokes and everything? Already?"

"He thinks you're the girl," Blaine said matter-of-factly, using his legs to lift the futon right along with Puck. Kurt huffed out a breath and left, Rachel smacking Puck in the back of the head to stop his resulting laughter before walking to the door to prop it open.

"Shit, B. That hurt."

"Now who's the girl?" She questioned happily, letting the door close once the two boys maneuvered the futon out of the room. She squeezed by them to run down the stairs, ready to help Kurt keep the double entry doors open for when Puck and Blaine passed. They loaded the futon into the bed of Puck's truck, and then Kurt led the way with Blaine to Blaine's aunt's house. Dalton's grading period had officially come to a close, and while Kurt had moved out at the beginning of the week, Blaine wasn't able to leave until today. Rachel sort of felt bad that he didn't get a real spring break like the rest of them, but she wasn't going to pretend like she wasn't happy he (and Kurt) had transferred schools. Nationals, here they come!

"Tell me again why we are wasting our last free Saturday doing this?"

"As opposed to what?" She asked comically, securing her seatbelt over her chest as Puck turned the key in the ignition. "Making out in your room until your mom comes home to change shifts?"

"Or in your room. Doesn't matter."

She rolled her eyes, letting their drive back down be surrounded in comfortable silence. It was something that had actually rubbed off on her from Noah. He really was the strong, silent type. And, after the display earlier and then again later when he and Blaine unloaded the futon into the house, her mind kept the emphasis on the _strong_. This thought paired with the silence from their trip from Blaine's aunt's house to Kurt's house was too much.

"You were just joking about using steroids, right?"

Puck cocked an eyebrow at her as he turned into Kurt's driveway, a smirk spreading onto his face. "What are you talkin' about?"

"That day …" she frowned and blushed at the same time, which was a new development when referencing that moment. "Before I propositioned you." His smirk widened and she rolled her eyes, hiding her embarrassment by exiting the truck and moving across the Hudson-Hummel front yard. "I told you that your arm seemed bigger and you said it was the steroids."

"You're so damn gullible." Puck chuckled and walked into the house behind her, stopping her from following Kurt and Blaine once they were inside. He trapped her between his two arms, flexing them just a little more than needed purposefully. "All of this is _completely_ natural, babe."

Rachel shuddered at his tone, his words splintering through her painfully. The logical side of her knew he was just talking about his muscles. She had asked him about his arms and he was answering her. But, the other side of her, the one who was simply intoxicated by his presence, couldn't ignore the double meaning. This attraction, her lust, was completely natural, and it was _natural_ to want to act on it.

"Hey, guys," Finn interrupted uneasily, Puck and Rachel's heads slowly turning to look at the tall teen. "I, uh, I didn't know you were here."

Rachel and Puck turned back to look at one another, both finding some relief in the shared look of frustration. Puck groaned softly as he pushed himself off the wall and away from her lithe frame, putting some distance between them despite how badly he didn't want to. His eyes were still having trouble focusing on Finn and not the desire currently clouding his gaze, but he managed to throw a smirk at the other boy.

"Just helped Blaine move into town."

"One of us. One of us," Quinn joked lightly as she, too, appeared in the foyer of the house. There was plenty of room for the four teens, but considering the occupants it suddenly felt very crowded. Puck and Quinn shared a look. Rachel and Finn shared a look. Puck looked at Finn. Quinn looked at Rachel. The two couples looked at each other. It. Was. Awkward.

And there really wasn't anything that could be done to alleviate that situation. It wasn't like they were hiding their relationship. Neither of them was now, actually, even though there had been some time in the limbo period after Sam where it was obvious Finn and Quinn weren't hanging out as platonically as they wanted people to believe. They'd all been together in school and in glee, but they hadn't really interacted closely since … well, ever.

"OK. That was fun for about three minutes," Kurt cut through the tension with his patented attitude, stepping in the middle of the makeshift circle the two couples had made. He picked a piece of lint off of his own shirt, turning on his heel as Blaine's steps could be heard as he approached the group. "I say we do something fun. Blaine's first activity as an official member of New Directions."

"My mom rented me a new video game."

"Negative. Berry sucks." Puck tossed his arm over her shoulder, lessening the verbal blow with his physical attentiveness. "I tried to get her to play _Call of Duty_ with me and the only thing we did was waste an hour arguin' about the '_gratuitous_ violence'." He used air quotes to mock her. "I think her hands are too tiny for the controller, anyway. It took me twenty minutes just to teach her how to hold the damn thing."

"That's what he said."

Five pairs of eyes widened in shock before the laughter took over the room. Blaine had managed to not just break the awkward tension that had consumed the room, but he'd also given a pretty clear window into where Kurt was developing his snarkier-than-usual comments. It wasn't necessarily a bad thing. In fact, everyone had noted that since meeting Blaine – and even more so since the two started dating – Kurt had started to loosen up and was a lot easier to be around.

Oddly enough, the same was also said about Rachel since Puck.

"Let's go bowling!" Finn suggested, his enthusiasm coming out of nowhere. "Do you like bowling?"

"I don't," Quinn answered instead of Blaine.

"I'm with Quinn." Kurt scrunched his nose up in disgust. "Something about sharing footwear does not equal jolly-good fun to me."

"Ah, come on, guys." Finn pouted, looking to Rachel. "You liked bowling, Rach. Remember? The pink ball?"

Rachel swallowed thickly, feeling three very curious pairs of eyes on her and one slightly amused expression from Blaine. Must be nice, to not know how tangled this web really was. To not know that Finn had taken Rachel out on a date even though they both knew he was dating Quinn at the time. To not know that Quinn had been pregnant with Puck's child at the same time but pretending it was Finn's. Must be nice.

"I'm down."

After Puck's support, there really wasn't any turning back. Like a bunch of sheep, they all followed the leader. Kurt, Blaine, Quinn, and Finn rode in one car and Puck and Rachel drove in his truck. Puck had made some excuse about possibly having to leave early to pick up Sarah from a friend's house if his mom couldn't, and Rachel didn't call him on it until they were almost to the bowling alley.

"What?"

"You lied," she repeated, an actual smirk on her face as she positioned herself in the seat so she was sitting angled directly at him. "Sarah has a sleepover tonight."

"I know that, and you know that." Puck turned into the parking lot, picking a spot all the way in the back. "But they don't."

"And why exactly is that an important distinction?" She asked, her voice rising to accommodate her amusement.

"Because. If we had to drive with the motley crew, I wouldn't have been able to do this." Puck snapped off his seatbelt and cleared the distance between them, Rachel's back pressing against the passenger door. Her breath hitched in surprise, but she made no move to protest, instead letting her hands sneak in between the lapels of his letterman jacket and grip his loose T-shirt. His fingers splayed over her lower back, pulling her closer to him and away from the door enough that she sunk down deeper in the truck. She flushed when her hands danced over the muscles of his chest and torso, remembering this was perfectly natural as she crept her hands underneath his shirt.

His groan grew in volume as he opened his mouth, sliding his tongue invitingly along hers. Her hands were tiny but they might as well have been made of fire, burning him alive from the outside in. Seriously, taking his time with her might slowly kill him, but on the other hand he was grateful for it. She managed to burn her way into his brain and even his heart. If she could set him ablaze with just a gentle touch on his abdomen, he wasn't entirely sure he was ready for her to touch him anywhere else.

"This was just so much more romantic in _Titantic_," Kurt pouted outside the window of Puck's truck, loud enough that Puck and Rachel registered the voice and slowly broke away from one another. Puck lifted his head up while Rachel leaned hers back so both were looking at Kurt and Blaine, who was actually wondering out loud what it would take to fog up the windows.

Frankly, if that make out session hadn't, Puck was sort of curious himself.

"Hey, Hummel," Puck said when Rachel opened her door, leaving it open so he could finish his thought. "When we're bowling and I start beatin' your ass, I don't want you to take that … like … literally. Cool?"

Kurt rolled his eyes, an expression shared by Blaine and then Rachel as the three of them joined Finn and Quinn at the front. For the second time that day, Puck jogged to catch up, the group setting up a lane at the fairly empty bowling alley. It didn't take long for the jokes about blue balls and Finn's giant-sized shoes to start, easing the group into a relatively peaceful and carefree afternoon of fun.

Peaceful except for Puck's constant smack talk.

"Don't everyone looked too shocked," Puck gloated after another strike, going back to his seat by Rachel and gesturing inappropriately as he said, "It's no secret that I can do amazing things with just these three fingers."

He was met with a loud chorus of unappreciative groans, and a good number of reddening cheeks. "That was _vile_."

"Whoa, Q." Finn stopped bending down to get his ball, his head and torso turning toward the group as he spoke. "I think that was supposed to be Rachel's line."

Rachel laughed along with everyone else, getting up after Finn for her turn before she stood and watched Kurt and Blaine go next. By the time Quinn's turn came, the brunette's attention moved back to Puck, a devilish thought circling in her mind. And while Rachel might have been the type of person who usually ignored those impulses, this time she couldn't stop her feet from stepping closer to him. _Much_ closer.

"You know," she started, her voice low to keep the conversation between them but also because she knew the timbre would affect him in a different way. "I never would have considered bowling to be a sport in the generally accepted definition, but there's clearly a lot of skill that goes into it."

Puck turned his head up at her warily, his hands hovering over the small fan on the ball holder. When she absently ran her index finger over his arm and across his back, his eyes closed and he had trouble thinking, let alone hearing. He was suddenly just glad he wasn't holding his bowling ball or he sure as shit would have dropped it on his foot.

"You're so precise. So … determined."

Her voice was more like a growl and Puck couldn't help but quickly straighten his posture, evaluating her. "Don't start something you can't finish, babe."

"I'm offended by the accusation," she said indignantly while the others laughed around them. Puck stretched to grab his ball, and Rachel made sure not to give him enough room to actually bowl. "I was simply complimenting you on your stellar performance thus far." Then she leaned in real close, her lips so close to his ear but not actually touching. "It's kind of a turn on."

Puck shook her away from him, taking the necessary three steps to get to the front of the lane, swinging the ball back and then releasing it fluidly as he swung his arm forward. It didn't feel any different than all the other times he had bowled today, but this time he grimaced and watched the ball almost immediately roll into the gutter. He turned back around when he heard Rachel giggling, the other four in the group howling in laughter. Finn was bending over himself he was laughing so hard, Kurt and Blaine similarly doubled over. Quinn actually high-fived Rachel. Quinn. _Rachel. _

"Because you're my girl, I'm going to give you a head start."

"What?"

"Run," he grunted, Rachel hiccuping in surprise when Puck sprinted after her. She made it about ten feet before his strong arms encircled her from behind, lifting her off the ground and swiftly into a fireman's hold. He ignored Rachel's immediate protests, carrying her back to the group and forcing her to sit on his lap while Blaine eventually made his way up for his turn. Then, mid-verbal attack, he shut her up with his mouth.

Rachel melted into the kiss, her balled up fists eventually stopping their assault on his chest and instead just sliding down his center. He left one arm settled across her legs, the hand pressed intimately into her hip while the other reached up and pushed some hair back behind her shoulders. He held her so firmly against him, and the only other noise from the group aside from Rachel's quiet whimper was Quinn's loud, purposeful coughing.

"No offense, Puck," Blaine started, feeling the tension rise in the group again as Rachel and Puck slowly broke away, still looking at each other intently despite the uncomfortable expressions of both Quinn and Finn. "But if that's how you plan to welcome me to the group, I think I might just move back."

"While I definitely don't want to side with the kissey monsters over there …" Kurt trailed off for a second, rolling his eyes at how Puck and Rachel were still breathing kind of hard. "That big thing isn't going to fit into my trunk."

"That's what she said," Rachel said quickly, smiling widely when Puck's mouth opened just a second too late to probably say the same thing. And just like that, the tension was gone again and the group continued with their fun, peaceful afternoon.


	11. Stealing Third

**Author's Note:** Back and better than ever (I hope). Not much to say except for that I love this story but I love you guys more for loving it, too. This chapter is probably the first real M-rated one, so I'm throwing that out there again. Not for children. Got it? Awesome. Oh, and there was some concern that I was making a Quinn/Rachel friendship. I just want to say quickly that while I could see them being amicable with each other, I think a Quinn/Rachel friendship is almost as unlikely as Rachel/Santana friendship (pretty un-effing-believable). I'm doing my best to keep this as in character as I can (and hopefully you all agree), so that concern is mildy addressed in this chapter!

Now, please enjoy (and let me know what you think!).

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><p>Rachel used her left hand to block the sun from her eyes, watching the players run to their positions on the field. Coach Bieste's booming voice could be heard all the way from her spot on the edge of the left side, even over Artie, Brittany, Tina, and Santana, who were bad-talking basically every teacher at McKinley; it was common practice for the former Cheerios and came easily to any frustrated teenager itching for the weekend.<p>

"I still don't get it!" She finally whined, dropping her hand down and turning away from the sun to face the four beside her. She was friends with Artie and more so with Brittany since those two had started dating, and she had nothing against Tina, but Rachel would never use the term of endearment to describe her and Santana's relationship. Things had been better between the two since after Regionals, though Rachel wasn't sure if it was because Sam was finally succeeding in taming the beast, or if it was a result of their win. Or, door number three, there was a chance it was a respect thing now that Rachel and Noah had been dating for longer than most expected. Santana wasn't one to openly express feelings outside of sex and her odd relationship with Brittany, but Rachel knew that she had a soft spot for Puck.

That affection went the other way, too, but Rachel tried not to focus on that too much. She'd only just gotten over her insecurities (or learned how to keep them well hidden) regarding Santana, and adding jealously to the already simmering pot wouldn't do any good. She trusted Puck whole heartedly, and actually understood how he and the Latina could be close friends. Despite her displeasure with the young woman, Santana and Puck were very similar.

"We all don't get what Puck sees in you, but we've learned to live with that mystery."

"What don't you get, Rach?" Artie asked, bypassing Santana's knee-jerk insult.

"I just barely understood football for that one evening. Now baseball? It doesn't make any sense!"

"I'm with Rachel. What do peanuts and Crackers Jacks have anything to do with whether or not you come back?"

There was a long pause that often followed anything Brittany ever said, then the shared look among those close to her that had heard. Like clockwork, they all nodded and immediately moved on, neglecting to give any real answer to the blonde's question, but sparing her feelings all the same.

"It's easy," Artie began, pointing toward the field. "Right now they are scrimmaging. So, the team is split up."

From Rachel's vantage point behind home plate, she wasn't sure why the coach was so upset, but all five of them cringed when she suddenly stormed the field. The players in the grass had clearly done something wrong, but Rachel wasn't exactly sure what. The person with the stick had hit the ball out toward them and even though no one caught it, the guy in the middle had thrown it back to Sam fairly quickly. It looked to be a long throw, so Rachel had actually been impressed. Coach Bieste was not of the same mindset.

"But they are a team. They shouldn't be divided like that!"

"It's like when we split into groups for glee. It makes them better."

"Right," Artie said, surprise in his tone that Santana had said something helpful _and_ nice. "See, Sam is the pitcher."

"And captain," Santana added on a purr, tossing out a sexy smile toward the field even if there was no way Sam could actually see her. Then again, sex appeal dripped from her pores, so maybe it wafted in the air enough that he could sense it being pushed his way. He did seem to throw the ball quicker just now, which was apparently a good thing.

"And Finn plays first base."

Rachel noted her former flame, half-wondering why Quinn wasn't out here with all of them but then remembering that the blonde was in crazy prom campaign mode. Rachel honestly didn't think the two of them could be at odds any worse than when Rachel was going after Finn, but it seemed like the student body's interest in Rachel and Puck for queen and king turned Quinn even crazier. She could only see that sparkling tiara and didn't care who she had to step on to get it. Frankly, for once in her life, Rachel didn't want to be the center of attention. She was just so happy that Puck had gotten over his initial rebel phase and decided they should probably make an appearance at the event.

"Because he's so lean and long, they'll have an advantage of throwing runners out more than other teams."

"Especially with Mike playing third. Between the two of them, they almost have the infield closed off!" Tina chimed in supportively, swooning a little as she watched her boyfriend run through a play.

"Well what about Noah?" Rachel asked impatiently, pointing toward the field. "He's not standing on any of those white things. He's just in the middle there, and doing all the work, if you ask me!"

"He's shortstop, Rach." Artie sighed, wondering what he got himself into. It had been easier teaching geometry to Brittany. "Shortstop plays between those two bases and also acts as a backup for each. It's the perfect position for Puck because he's quick."

"Not in everything." This time Rachel didn't appreciate Santana's comment, scowling at the Latina in response. "Oh, calm down, Berry. You'll know what I mean soon enough."

Rachel huffed out a breath, resting her elbow against her knee and plopping her chin into her open palm. She watched with a glare as Coach Bieste ran through random scenarios, Rachel catching certain words but unable to piece anything substantial together. Artie, too, kept spitting out all sorts of sports jargon – like extra innings and ground-rule double – that didn't make any sense. By the time the practice was over, she was even more confused than when she had started trying to learn about the silly sport.

Basketball was easy. One team had to shoot in one hoop, and another team had to shoot in the other. The positions didn't really matter, and the opposing teams wore vastly different colors so she could tell the difference between them. During practice, half the boys played without their shirts on, and the games lasted for basically a set length of time. She missed basketball.

"What's with the face, babe?"

"You guys have been dating for like three months. You're just now noticing her face?" Santana joked, filing her nails as she waited for Sam to finish up in the locker room. Artie and Brittany had left with Tina and Mike, but Sam was a bit of a metrosexual. He was notorious for taking the longest in the showers, often the last one out after all his cleaning and grooming. Even the coach left before him. Honestly, it was only fair that Sam gave Kurt the benefit of the doubt when he'd thought he was gay.

"When is baseball done?"

"It is done. Let's go."

"No. I mean for good. The … season," she clarified, getting up off the bleachers and stepping in sync with Puck. He waved goodbye to Santana and switched his gym bag from his left side to his right, giving Rachel invitation to stand a little closer. "When is it done done?"

"It just started, babe." He chuckled, seeing her frown deepen. "Shit. I forgot my jersey. I need to clean it before the first game." He opened his car door and threw his bag in. "Come on. It won't take long."

He grabbed Rachel's hand and the two of them ran through the parking lot back toward the school. There was only one door that stayed open past four, and the two walked through it and toward the locker room on a sprint. Sam passed them in the hallway, looking like he'd just come from the salon instead of finishing an exhausting baseball practice. He did the same thing after glee practice, and Puck wondered just how much shampoo and soap that kid went through.

"While I don't want it to derail you from your actual academics, I think I might need a lesson on the rules of baseball. Artie tried to teach me again today, but I still don't feel like I grasp the concept."

"Do you need to learn the same way I do?" He asked while waggling his eyebrows, not even waiting for her likely offended remark before pushing through the locker room door and holding it open for her. "So, here it is. The boys' locker room."

"I've seen it before." Rachel scrunched her nose. "Smells the same."

"When have you been in here?" He asked curiously, walking over to the bench where his jersey was absently tossed under. When Rachel didn't respond, he turned and looked at her face, seeing the embarrassment as clear as day. Finn. Got it. He quickly bent down to grab the garment, busying his hands and his mind with the task.

"I know you've been in the girls' locker room before."

"Dozens on times."

She rolled her eyes but smiled at the genuine look of regret that flashed over his features. "Probably not something you should boast about to your current girlfriend."

"Noted," he answered with a grin, a whole different kind of distraction entering his mind. "But, speakin' of boasting, I happen to be an excellent tutor on the subject of baseball."

"Oh yeah?" She asked breathlessly, feeling his words just as much as she felt his arms encircle her waist. "Think you could teach me a thing or two?"

"Well, you already have the outfit to be the perfect little schoolgirl." He smirked, his grip on her hips loosening to toy with the fabric of her short skirt. Rachel bit her lip and he didn't even bother trying to hide his groan, instead pushing her gently against the lockers behind her. "Let's skip positions for the sake of my sanity and talk about the bases."

Rachel nodded absently at Puck, her breath ragged as he slipped out of his letterman's jacket and pressed himself into her. His fingers were trailing slowly up her arms and down her sides, and Rachel closed her eyes just to relish in the feel of him touching her. The effect was always an odd mix of a slow burning feeling and something that undoubtedly made her shiver. He'd always been a unique combination of fire and ice.

"You know first." He leaned in and pressed his lips against hers softly, letting her adjust to the sudden assault before deepening the kiss, opening his mouth and sliding his tongue against hers. She nipped at his bottom lip and he groaned, inwardly thinking she didn't just know first. She owed it. She was like the first base coach she was so damn good at it. "Next is second."

Rachel hiccupped when his right hand lifted from her hip to cup her breast, his thumb grazing over her nipple. The small bud immediately hardened under the attention, poking out through the thin shirt she wore. It wasn't enough, though, Rachel moving her hands off Puck's shoulders and removing the offending garment off her body. She reminded herself that they were in a semi-public place even if the likelihood of someone coming in was slim to none, but all thoughts of regretting her decision fluttered out as a low groan rumbled through Puck's throat. His mouth quickly moved to her neck, attacking the sensitive flesh before trailing down, sucking on the newly exposed skin.

Without his body grinding against hers, Rachel felt weak standing by the lockers, her hands reaching out to grab at his shirt. Puck, however, made no move to leave his bent down position, simply moving from one subtle mound to the other as his hands danced over the bare skin of her back. The only thing she managed to do was rid him of his shirt, which actually worked in her favor. The second her nails made contact with the flesh of his back, Puck stood upright, pushing her body back hard against the lockers.

"Back to first?" She mumbled into his kisses, gasping when he ground his hips into hers. His hands snaked behind her and undid the clasp of her bra, moving down her back then to her stomach before slowly creeping up to her bare chest. Rachel arched into him and then responded in kind, her hands taking the opposite path and instead falling down his chest and then his abdomen. She felt his muscles tense under her touch, her journey hitting the speed bump of the waistband on his gym shorts before he finally pulled away from her. "I like second."

"Me too." His voice actually cracked when Rachel's hand dipped inside his shorts, his head moving forward until hitting the locker with a loud clang. The pain didn't even register, though. The only thing he could feel were Rachel's tiny hands moving over his length, tentative but explorative. It had been a _long_ time. Exclusivity was a new concept in Puck's world, one that made cold showers not such a new concept. But, shit, if he had to be with one chick, he was suddenly never more grateful that he picked Rachel. "Fuck, you're good."

Rachel beamed at the compliment, his encouragement making her more confident, bolder. She let her hands twist and pull, stroked him slowly and then quickly. She swiped her thumb across the tip and let one hand meander down to his testicles. She was touching everything she could and by the sounds he was making, she was doing it all right. At least she was until she suddenly felt Puck's hands creep under her skirt.

"Baseball isn't an individual sport, babe."

She shuddered at his words and the way he whispered them right into her ear. If he hadn't been so close, she might not have heard him over the echoing in her head. Her mind was screaming in pleasure, focused entirely on the feel of Puck's index finger tracing the line of her panties before curling inside the elastic. She gasped at the first bare contact, Puck's lips removed from her neck when she abruptly lifted onto her tiptoes.

Puck had gotten girls off before. More than once, and in many different venues. But this was different. With Rachel, touching her made him just as excited as it was obviously making her. And it wasn't even from what she was doing, which she had stopped at the beginning but had started up again once she got used to the feel of his hand on her most private area. She had lost the power she no doubt was enjoying, but she still had a lot of control in those tiny hands of hers. For every plunge of Puck's finger into her, Rachel countered with a stroke of her own. For every swipe of his thumb across her clit, she swiped her thumb over his own sensitive tip. No, what she was doing was great, but it was the way she reacted to him that really sent a jolt of adrenaline through his veins. All he wanted to do was make that feeling last forever no matter how painful it was to delay what he knew they were both building up toward.

"What's the next base?" She asked breathlessly, her head slumping down to his shoulder because she couldn't bring herself to keep it upright any longer. Her body was acting as if separate from her brain, Rachel unknowingly thrusting into Puck's ministrations.

"Third," he answered on a growl, too far gone to understand why she was asking. He was pushed back to sit on the bench behind him, Rachel whimpering slightly when his fingers parted from her folds but otherwise not protesting the change in position. She simply attacked his mouth again with a searing kiss while pooling his boxers and gym shorts at his ankles. Then, without hesitation and with far more confidence than even she expected, she stopped kissing him and instead wrapped her mouth around his aching erection. "F-fuck!"

Puck gripped the edge of the bench with both hands, no doubt leaving nail marks in the laminate wood when she first brought her lips to his length. His dick was harder than he ever could remember it being before, but that wasn't necessarily saying much since he was fairly certain he couldn't even recite his address right then. She was using what she just learned for second and applied it to this new base, her hands and mouth working in unison to drive him closer and closer to oblivion. He could feel her tongue swirling around him and then, surprisingly, he felt his tip hit the back of her throat and he once again cursed out loud.

Rachel smiled at the sound of Puck losing control, empowered by her effect on him. She might be learning all of this for the first time, but he most certainly wasn't. Puck was known for his way with the ladies and she got no small amount of satisfaction in the idea that she might be taking him to a new, better place. Somewhere only she could take him. Somewhere they could go together.

"B, I'm gonna …" Puck tried to give some warning, tried to pull away. But when she started humming and swallowing around him _while_ still bobbing up and down, there was no turning back. He sputtered out something unintelligible and fisted her long hair just in time for his orgasm to completely overtake him. It was stronger and more violent than he'd ever experienced, and he actually felt light headed when it was all over. His vision had to be blurry, because he swore he saw her lick her lips afterward and then smile. "Shit."

"Good student?" She asked coyly, bending down to grab her bra and shirt. Puck still didn't move, though the motion of him shaking his head repeatedly from side to side caught her eye.

"The best," he finally muttered, reaching down for his boxers and shorts and lifting them as he stood. He actually stumbled a bit walking to get his own shirt, and couldn't help but laugh as he put it on. When the fabric passed his eyes, Rachel was in front of him, leaning against the lockers with a soft smile. "Getting called straight up to the majors, babe."

Rachel giggled, letting her hands rest behind his neck when he wrapped his arms around her waist. "I still don't understand baseball."

"Well don't worry," he said as they walked out, Puck's jersey tossed over his shoulder and his arm draping across Rachel's upper body. "That was most definitely just the first lesson."


	12. Dancing Around Issues

**Author's Note:** Alright, ladies and ... gentleman? Maybe. That would be cool ... I'm having "one of those days" and am in serious need of a pick me up. I don't drink, smoke, or do drugs, so this is what I do. I write and then post and then demand feedback with big, pouty, quivering lips. LOL! Because I'm approaching the 100 review mark (wha?), I might be convinced to do something crazy for the lucky reviewer of the sacred slot (like, a prompt oneshot fic ... not a hit on anyone). Maybe. Point is, please read and enjoy and then review. And I'll thank you all in advance for that. *dramatic pause* Thanks. (:oP

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><p>Puck shifted uncomfortably in the overstuffed red-velvet theater chair, his eyes open but scowling toward the stage. Rachel was the lead ballerina and could no doubt see him in all his pissed off glory, but he didn't care. When he'd agreed to come to this stupid tutu festival, he'd been trying to be the good boyfriend. He didn't know he'd be sandwiched between her two dads and his mom and sister for two hours of a long ass time. She also left out the minor detail that he would need to dress up for said event, so not only did he look uncomfortable but he felt it, too.<p>

"Bravo!" His mom was the first to cheer, standing up with everyone else once the show ended. Rachel's dads threw roses onto the stage and demanded an encore, which even Puck knew wasn't protocol for these types of things. Still, he clapped along with everyone else because Rachel _had_ been pretty awesome. He didn't know what story the dancing was supposed to be telling and he sure as Hell didn't know the names of any of the moves she did, but fuck if she didn't look hot up there doing them. And he'd never admit it to anyone, but her wide, enthusiastic smile at all the applause was what usually tipped the scale in her favor. She was gorgeous.

Not, however, gorgeous enough for him to forget the evening of doom was far from over. But he was sure they could work out something to make up for the third and final blow to why he was pissed. In fact, if she even uttered the words "coat" and "closet" in the same sentence, all could easily be forgiven.

"Did you like it?" She asked eagerly when she came out of the back room. She'd changed out of her ballet outfit into something more suited for the after party. That's right. He spent two hours watching 19 other people he didn't a flying rat's ass about dancing around on stage and _now_ he had to go to some stupid party and talk to them all about it.

"You were amazing," he said in a way of misdirection.

_That_ he could handle. He wasn't worried about not being able to look in the other people's eyes and tell them the recital had made him a believer or whatever bullshit they wanted to hear. Puck was fairly good at lying. But he couldn't lie to himself, and he knew the after party was going to a total snoozefest. He'd taken Rachel to a few of her practices and he'd actually talked to a few of the other dancers. And, yea, maybe he'd singled out the dudes to make sure they knew Rachel was his girl, but that wasn't the point – turns out they were all gay anyway; like, made Kurt look macho in comparison kind of gay. The point was they all sucked. Seriously. All of them.

"Oh, Daddy." Rachel giggled appreciatively at the line of praise her father had let slip, her hand softly swatting at his chest. "I know."

Puck chuckled, hearing a patent Rachel response and unable to find it anything but adorable. Most people would bypass blatant compliments with a little modesty, but his girl wasn't most people. She'd certainly had learned some humility since he'd met her, but she was never going to turn down praise. It was like air to her; she needed it to live.

"How long do you expect the after party to last, dear?" Rachel's other father asked. He was the stricter of the two, the one Puck tried to avoid whenever he was over at the Berry house. Her dads were pretty cool about him being there, trusting their daughter enough to let the door stay closed (and locked, but they didn't know that) and not really setting a curfew. But Puck knew better than to assume they wouldn't hire people to kill him if he ever did anything to hurt their little girl.

"I'm not sure, but I'll call when we are on the way home." Rachel kissed her dad on the cheek and her daddy on the other cheek. Then she thanked Mrs. Puckerman and Sarah for coming out to support her. Puck's mom made a huge deal about being invited, and then finally everyone was gone and it was just the two of them. Well, the two of them and all the ballet losers.

Rachel inhaled a deep breath when they entered the main room of the party. She always felt more confident on Puck's arm, but a lot of the other girls in the class seemed to have it out for her. Plus, they were the types of girls who went to prestigious private schools and whose mother's doted on their every wish and dream. Rachel had gotten by just fine with her determination and her fathers' encouragement, but it was times like these when she yearned for a mother. Someone who could tell her the outfit she chose was perfect for the evening, accentuating her features and hiding her flaws – while simultaneously mentioning that Rachel had no flaws.

"You look quite dashing tonight, Noah," she complimented, her fingers splaying over the black material of his dress shirt as her arm encircled his. He wore black slacks and a black vest but no tie, and Rachel was pretty sure the outfit was something he'd worn for glee one day – missing a fitted hat, perhaps. It was very Frank Sinatra of him, but it was also purely Puck.

"And you look edible," he leered, his eyes running appreciatively over her outfit for the first time now that he didn't need to worry about the backlash from the parental units. The dress was simple enough, just a pale pink spring dress with a black sash at the waist that tied in the back. But paired with the strappy black heels that almost put her at eye level with him (like he was looking at her eyes), he really did want to eat her up.

"Noah," Rachel chastised lightly when she felt his flat hand on her back, moving over the bare skin and sliding down to covered but much more dangerous territory. "This is hardly the place."

"Well let's go somewhere else then."

"While it is for entirely different reasons, you know I don't like these people anymore than you do. So, why don't you go get us a couple of drinks while I congratulate the male lead?"

"By congratulate do you mean point out again that he almost dropped you during one of the lifts?" He asked comically, not taking demands even from his girlfriend without a little bit of a fight.

"I was going to say that after I speak with him and a few other people we could leave, but if you'd rather we can stay here and …"

"Really?" He coughed, backing away quickly with a wide grin. "Sweet deal."

Rachel rolled her eyes and made her way over to Joel, offering her sincere adulation to the male lead and accepting his genuine praise in return. One of the other dancers asked everyone to gather around so she could take a picture, and Rachel rarely turned down the opportunity to be photographed. When she came back, there was a sea of people between her and Noah, but she still caught his eye all the way from the makeshift bar. It was like any scene in a romantic comedy, his stare too intense for her to ignore – which is why Rachel didn't see the director of the program waving her hand in front of Rachel's face until it was obvious she'd been caught.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry, Ms. Powers."

Puck grinned as he watched Rachel try to recover from her lapse in social conduct. He might be leaning against the wall nursing a water (seriously?) at the lamest party ever, but at least he could make his girl stupid with just a look. She was still apologizing to that old bitty when suddenly she stopped talking and completely paled. He almost thought she was choking, but her eyes kept staring out straight past the director. And that's when he saw the same thing she did.

Jesse.

"You were breathtaking," Jesse said before leaning forward and kissing Rachel softly on the left cheek and then the right. She didn't even have time to thank him, Puck's voice booming inside the large room.

"The fuck?" Puck stormed up to the curly-haired boy, stopping his advance only when they were face to face.

"Noah!" Rachel admonished on a hushed growl, trying to grab at his arm and pull him away from his confrontational stance but Puck just shrugged out of her hold. Rachel quickly glanced at the director, whose frown deepened before she walked away to likely distract the other guests. "Noah, stop!"

"No way. This guy was lucky he ran away like a little bitch that first time." Puck squared his shoulders, staring down at Jesse with nothing but rage in his eyes. "Egg my girl again, St. Jackass. I dare you."

"Noah!" Rachel finally stepped between the two boys, forcing herself into the tight space. "This is completely unnecessary." His glare moved down to her. "Jesse apologized for his wrongdoing and I've forgiven him. Please, just …"

"What?" He asked, and Rachel didn't respond because she wasn't sure which part he was questioning. "You've talked to this asshole since …"

"You're making a scene, Noah. Can we please just …"

"Screw this. I'm outta here." Rachel watched aghast as Puck turned to his left and pushed open to two side doors that led out of the theater. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she mumbled her apologies to everyone she could before running out the doors to the lobby. By the time she grabbed her coat from the closet, she remembered she didn't have a way home. She sank onto the plush couch in front of the front doors, staring out into the night while willing herself not to lose it until she was away from prying eyes.

"This seat taken?" Rachel sniffled and shook her head, moving a few inches to her right just so there would be extra space between the two of them when he sat. It wasn't like when she was dating Finn and purposely put distance between herself and Noah. She wasn't worried about losing control with Jesse. She just really didn't want to be close to him.

"What are you doing here?" She didn't mean for it to sound breathless, but after Puck had left it sort of felt like the wind had been knocked out of her.

"It's my spring break. I'm in town visiting my friends from Vocal Adrenaline." Jesse crossed his right leg over his left and clasped his hands together at the knee. She couldn't help but wish Noah were there if only so they could share a look and laugh later about how silly Jesse looked right then. "They told me you guys won your region this year with an original song." Rachel nodded in affirmation, but didn't offer anything more than that. "You've sort of got them shaking in their designer shoes."

She let a small smile slip, but knew better than to give him any details on what they had planned for nationals. Rachel was expected to write another song for her to perform as a solo, and then the club might try to do another one as a group if they could find something to go along with the other three songs they were starting to learn in preparation for the big event. Nationals meant they had more time to perform, but continuity was important and if it didn't all have the same underlying theme, it wouldn't matter how hard they'd worked to get there.

"I have to say, I'm surprised to see Puck on your arm this evening. I would have expected Finn."

Rachel turned her head to face her ex-boyfriend, digesting his words one thought at a time. She noted that it was strange that he said Puck came on her arm, when she considered it the other way around. While she was certainly embarrassed about how he had lashed out in front of everyone, and she knew what some of the girls said about him after they remarked on how attractive he was (cute but poor was the consensus of many of the prissy girls), Rachel was never ashamed of Puck. He'd put a lot of effort into changing his image, and no one rewarded him for all that hard work. No one saw him for who he is, only for what he was.

And she knew she should just ignore everything Jesse said and tell him to mind his own business, but she couldn't form the words. She was alone and not quite ready to go looking for Noah, who she knew wasn't gone. No matter how mad he was, he wouldn't just leave. It wasn't him.

"Finn and I broke up a few months ago." She sighed. "We dated for about six months. It didn't work out." She shrugged, not wanting to go into the details, especially not with Jesse.

"So you settled for Puck."

"Noah," she corrected quickly then shook her head, "and no. I didn't settle for him." She bowed her head, feeling the tears start to well back up behind her eyeballs. Rachel wasn't sure why she was telling him any of this, but she was unable to hold the rest in. "I love him."

She knew he would be shocked. In fact, she was kind of surprised she said it, too. She'd thought it a lot lately, wondered when exactly she went from falling to fell. But she hadn't said it before. Not to anyone. And then it came out so easily that she suddenly worried it would be harder to keep in now. But Jesse didn't say anything. Wordlessly, he moved from his seat and left through the front doors. Rachel wasn't sure why, but she couldn't bring herself to care either. He was probably just uncomfortable with her crying, which was fine. She wanted to be alone anyway.

"Hey," Puck said, sagging his head when Rachel's jolted up. He'd spent the past twenty minutes alone outside. The first five were spent pacing around, trying not to destroy or vandalize anything. The next ten were spent muttering to himself about how stupid it was that she yelled at him and how he didn't even want to come to this stupid thing and how Jesse was a big, flaming loser. After that, he'd calmed down enough where he started to think he might have overreacted, thought maybe he didn't handle the situation like her should have. Then he had come back inside and heard Rachel and Jesse talking.

Honestly, his anger immediately flared up again. He couldn't help it. He was Puckasaurus and there were things about him that could never be changed. He was always going to curse. He was always going to like football more than musicals. He was always going to want to solve problems with his fists instead of his words. And even though he wasn't ready to say it yet, when he heard Rachel say she loved him, he knew he would always, always love her.

"Hey," she answered back, wiping underneath her eyes and exhaling a shaky breath. "I-I'm sorry, Noah. I …"

"No, don't." Puck shook his head, coming to kneel in front of her, his hands on her knees. "You have nothin' to be sorry for. It was me." He sighed, one hand lifting to drag over face. "We weren't together when that jerk dumped you, but … I wanted to kill him. And then you said that you've talked to him since …"

"It was during the summer. Before he left for college. He just …"

"It doesn't matter. It's not my business." Puck lifted his eyes back to gaze up into hers. "But seein' him reminded me that you don't have to be with me and … well, I don't like being reminded of that."

Rachel cocked her head to one side, looking through him as he refused to lift his gaze. He just placed delicate kisses on her knees, pleading with her to forgive him without actually groveling. She knew why he reacted the way he did, but she'd never understand his thought process behind his actions. How could he honestly look in the mirror and not see the wonderful man she did?

"I don't _have_ to be with you, Noah. I choose to be." Rachel let her shoulders drop as she lifted her hands, one coming to rest over the two of his on her knees and one moving to caress his cheek. She wasn't sure what he had heard, but she knew it was too soon to tell him how she really felt. Not unless she wanted to see a large Puck-shaped hole in the wall across from them that would no doubt match the giant hole in her heart afterward. "Understand?"

"I just think you deserve better," he finally admitted, though to be fair it was exactly what he told her months ago at the championship game. And, just like she did that time, tonight she rolled her eyes at him and then shook her head from side to side, silently disagreeing before verbally doing so.

"Well you need to get over that."

Puck grinned at how matter-of-factly she said it, inhaling the first full breath he'd had since seeing Jesse. "That's it? No big speech?"

"I figure as long as I know who you really are, eventually you'll start to believe I'm right." Rachel placed her other hand on his face, forcing him to keep her gaze. She bit her lip self-consciously, inwardly noting the similarities between the two of them before she voiced her own fears out in a way he would understand. "Instead of your father."

Puck knew his eyes widened, but other than that he did his best to hide his shock at her words. Rachel, similarly, was ignoring the fact that she said them out loud, standing up to put on her coat and adjust her gym bag over her shoulders. All the sounds and motions around him were drowned out by the sound of blood rushing by his ears. Here was this girl, this woman, and not only did she admit (not to him, but still) that she loved him, but she _knew_ him. She knew he had a past as a womanizer, knew he slept with and impregnated his best friend's girl, knew he'd seen the inside of a jail cell almost as much as the inside of a classroom, and she still loved him. She could still stand there and tell him he was better than even he knew, and she believed it.

"Wait." Puck grabbed Rachel's hand just in time to swing her body back toward his, effectively stopping her retreat. His fingers intertwined with hers and he lifted his other hand to cradle her chin and jaw before slanting his lips over hers. It wasn't overly aggressive nor was it publicly unacceptable, but he made sure she could feel his passion in the kiss. He made sure he poured every ounce of emotion he had for her before he pulled away. He wasn't prepared to tell her how he felt yet, but he wasn't opposed to showing her. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," she answered softly, though she couldn't for the life of her think for what he was saying thanks. But, if it ended with a kiss like that, she wasn't going to complain either. Nor was she going to point out the fact that he was still holding her hand as they walked out of the theater. Instead, she just rested her head on his shoulder and wrapped her other hand around his bicep.

"Well thirty minutes is unacceptable. I'm a very important person and there are places I need to be."

Rachel knitted her eyebrows together as her and Puck passed Jesse on the way to Puck's car, her eyes widening when she saw all four tires on Jesse's car looked flat. She didn't know a lot about cars, but she figured the odds of something like that happening were pretty slim. Especially with the car parked.

"Noah!" She hissed quietly, tightening her grip on him. "Did you _slash_ his tires?"

"What?" He asked innocently, opening her door while looking back toward Jesse, his grin widening uncontrollably. "This is a bad neighborhood, B. It could have been anyone."


	13. Sticking His Tongue Out at Cliches

**Author's Note:** Thank you everyone who's still reading and still reviewing. I'm not entirely happy with this chapter, but hopefully I'm just being tough on myself. Either way, let me know what you think!

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><p>Rachel sat at one of the overly decorated tables pushed to the side of the McKinley High gymnasium, her eyes cast toward the dance floor absently. The school had hired a band to play the standard high school dance songs as well as some of the new Top-40 hits, and everyone seemed to be enjoying himself or herself even though she knew they'd leave remarking on how corny the whole event had been. The boys were just putting up with the streamers and cut out stars for the sake of their girlfriendsdates and hoping someone had the nerve to spike the punch. Similarly, the girls were too busy fighting with each other or acting coy about what was going to happen later that night to care that Mr. Figgins and a bunch of the other chaperones were patrolling the dance floor to hinder anything too inappropriate. Rachel almost expected one of them to grab a balloon and balance it between the pelvises of each couple, saying that if it broke they'd have to help clean up afterward.

She turned back to face the table, which was empty until Lauren and some guy that Rachel wasn't even sure went to McKinley suddenly came over. It wasn't like people from other schools weren't allowed to be invited, but the odds of the students mingling outside the community were unlikely. The only other school even close to Lima was a little more than ten miles away, and because they were the closest they were also their rivals. Could Lauren be fraternizing with the enemy?

"I don't believe I've met your …" Rachel hesitated, debating what exactly to call the boy sitting next to Lauren with eyes only for her, "date?"

"This is Jack. He's just a friend. Say hello." Rachel extended her hand out to the boy, swallowing nervously as she did so. She knew the plus-sized girl wasn't bossing her around, but Rachel still felt defensive just being in her presence. She remembered that Puck had said Lauren was the only person more badass than him, and while Rachel had teased him for admitting such a thing, Rachel now knew there was no debating the fact. Lauren didn't just demand men to dote on her or to treat her with respect. She demanded attention, just by being her.

In a way, she and Rachel were very similar.

"Where's Puckerman?"

Rachel frowned, moving her eyes back to the dance floor even as she shrugged in response. Puck had left more than twenty minutes ago, and Rachel wasn't naïve enough to think he got lost on his way to the bathroom. He hadn't really wanted to come in the first place, and when he'd eventually agreed (whether because she'd asked so many times that he got frustrated or simply because he knew he couldn't swing going to the after party and not going to the dance) it had been reluctantly. He showed up at her house in his car in rare form, though, arriving with a clean car, a clean outfit, and a clean attitude. He refrained from making any inappropriate comments about the hundreds of pictures her fathers had taken, and he'd put on her corsage without one mention of purposefully touching her boob. He'd even complimented her dress and kissed her softly on the temple before offering her his arm and leading her out of the house.

If the night had ended there, it would have been perfect.

"Hey, Rach."

She lifted her head high to accommodate for his size, her smile widening only a little bit considering his distraught expression. Finn waved meekly at Lauren, his eyebrows knitting in confusion even as he offered the strange boy a nod, too. When his eyes dropped back down to her, he smiled slightly and then took the seat next to her. The one that had been previously occupied by Puck. Her boyfriend.

"Havin' fun?" He asked noncommittally, Rachel wondering if he was testing the waters but then remembering this was Finn. He was just _that_ innocent.

"I hear prom is a rite of passage, but I'm all too pleased to have experienced it as a junior so that I perhaps will be able to skip it next year."

"Yea, kinda blows." Finn looked around with a scowl, making note of the idle lighting and the confetti spread about the tables and floor. "But …" He hesitated, letting his eyes come back to her and then _over_ her. "You look really pretty."

"Thank you," she breathed, taking note of her outfit as if she'd forgotten what she wore. Then she glanced back up at him, brushing her growing bangs out of her eyes as she spoke. "You also look very handsome."

Finn gave that boyish grin only he had even as he shrugged. "Quinn picked it out." He fiddled with the bright blue cummerbund, clearly noting the color with disdain. "I'm totally changing out of it before heading to the lake."

"I would hope so," she commented lightly. "Otherwise I think you'd be a little overdressed for the activities that I imagine to occur at these events. You know, if _American Pie_ is any indication."

"I knew you were paying attention when I made you watch that movie."

"The question is can the same be said for you and _Funny Girl_?" Adorably, Finn actually looked guilty. She laughed lightly. "I figured."

Finn laughed, too, the tension in his shoulders relaxing when he realized she wasn't going to explode on him. Rachel half wondered if he was expecting some backlash because of how she acted when they were together or because of how Quinn acted in their relationship. She hoped it was the latter. Then again, one time during the summer he'd compared her to Godzilla, so Rachel knew better than to assume she wasn't at least partially to blame.

"How's Quinn taking the loss?"

Finn frowned again, his eyes moving back to the dance floor. Like Rachel, he wasn't exactly looking at the couples gathered in the center, but rather past the groupings of people at the double doors in the front. It was the last spot they'd seen Quinn, seconds before her angry retreat and minutes before the screaming match between her and Finn. And, if it weren't obvious Rachel was keeping track, it was the same spot Puck had disappeared to a mere minute after everything went down.

"Don't act like you didn't hear." Rachel sagged her head slightly, partially in shame and partially because she didn't want to look at him when he was so obviously upset. "The whole damn school heard."

"It will be okay," she responded softly, not sure whether she believed it or not. In her head she was thinking about what Puck had told her at the championship game, about how Quinn had planned on getting back together with Finn long before it actually happened. It had all been a part of her master plan. First prom kind and queen, then homecoming, then prom again, then class couple. After that it would be one perfectly orchestrated milestone after the next, all in the exact right amount of time and without mishap. Unfortunately, the students at McKinley hadn't gotten the memo.

"I'm just sick of the drama," he admitted quietly, running a tired hand over his face. He looked so much older than she'd seen him look before, and it made her frown. "And being with Quinn is _all_ about drama." Then he looked deeply at her. "Not like how it was with you."

She inhaled a shallow breath, her brain sending a thousand different signals in order to get out of this situation as unscathed as possible. "I'm fairly certain all relationships have drama, and I'm not above admitting that I've had my share of dramatic moments."

"Hey, watch it."

She turned at the sound of his voice, her lungs emptying on a relieved sigh. He looked almost exactly as he did when he'd gone to her ballet recital, except this time he had the hat and a matching boutonniere clasped to the black vest. In his hands were two small glasses of punch, his face perfectly neutral as he evaluated Finn's proximity to Rachel.

"That's my girl you're talking about."

Finn managed to make small talk for about a minute before he got uncomfortable and left, Lauren and Jack following suit shortly thereafter. Puck watched Rachel sip anxiously at the punch he'd brought her, made note of how tense she looked. Her hair was pulled up in some crazy updo, and all it did at that moment was accentuate the muscles clenching in her neck and shoulders. It was a shame, really, because it should have shown off the beautiful necklace and matching earrings she wore or how smooth her skin was.

He knew he messed up after going after Quinn. Honestly, he still wasn't sure why he did it. Maybe it was because there was something about this time of the year that made him remember that there used to be a time where he wanted her to look at him the way Rachel did now. Maybe it was because he'd been wearing a stupid crown that he didn't even want and knew that she would think it wasn't fair. Even if she couldn't necessarily be prom king, it was still just another thing he took away from her. First her virginity, then her abs, now this.

"I think I owe you a dance," he said suddenly, frowning when Rachel actually flinched. He wanted to go back to the beginning of the night, when he seriously never felt lighter. He wanted to go back to the time when the smile that crossed Rachel's face wasn't forced. And reached her eyes. Reached his heart.

They walked hand in hand to the dance floor, Puck leading them to an open area off-center as soon as a slow song started. He'd heard the song a few times when he actually let Rachel touch his radio, but he wasn't familiar enough to really know it. Instead, it just became background music as he focused on her. The way she lifted her arms to wrap around his neck, the way she felt pressed against them as they swayed slowly. Her eyes shone brightly under the dim lights, and even though they weren't exactly close to a speaker, he couldn't help but dip his head a little so his mouth would be right by her ear.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

Rachel shivered at the way his breath danced across her skin, the words dripping into her ear and down to her heart. She wasn't quite sure what he was apologizing for, as she wasn't even sure she knew why she was mad. A big part of her understood why he felt obligated to Quinn, so she wasn't particularly surprised that he'd been the one to follow her after the epic storm out. Maybe he should have said something to her beforehand, and maybe he shouldn't have been gone for as long as he was, but she couldn't fault him for caring about other people. Even if that other person was his ex-girlfriend and the mother of his child – not to mention her once arch nemesis.

"I promised you the first dance," he clarified honestly even though it was so damn charming. Rachel pulled back just enough to look up into his eyes, her smile cracking enough that he knew it was genuine.

"As long as I get the last."

He nodded softly, bringing her back to her original spot nestled against him, the song slowly fading into another, more upbeat tune. The two teens continued their gentle dance, though, circling around slowly as they let the dance he had shared with the prom queen – no one really guessed Amber Stevenson would win even if she was a senior and had won the year before, too – fade into the category of not important while theirs climbed the charts. It was a little past eleven when they decided to leave, both of them changing in the restrooms at the school before heading to the party at one of the baseball guy's house on McClintock Lake. The place was already crowded and loud, the drama from the dance somewhat seeping into the party when Finn and Quinn arrived separately. Simply because it was much more interesting than the game of quarters a few of the football guys were playing, Rachel and Puck watched Finn and Quinn fight about reputations and popularity for about five minutes before Puck took Rachel's hand and led her outside.

The air was cool but comfortable, a perfect May evening as the couple meandered further and further away from the house. Puck had been to this place a few times before, and knew the boat dock was always abandoned. He'd taken a girl or two there to make out before, but usually he just came out there to be alone. He always liked how secluded it felt, like a completely different world when he was just lying on his back watching the stars as the water gently moved the dock under him.

"I'm not a terribly good swimmer, Noah."

"Well there goes skinny dippin'." He chuckled, grabbing a blanket out of the boat that was tied up and laying it over the hard wood. Rachel saw a few patio cushions nearby and threw those down, too, joining Puck at the edge of the dock. "S'nice out here, right?"

"It's lovely," she answered softly, molding her body to fit inside his frame, both their feet dangling over the side as her back rested against his chest. His fingers danced absently over her bare arms, hers scratching against his jeans above the surface of his thighs and knees. The two watched the water in silence for a long moment, noting the soft ripples created by the breeze and the way the moon reflected off the clear canvas. "And quiet."

"Afraid no one will be able to hear you scream?" Puck grinned even though she couldn't see him. "Or maybe happy about that?"

"I was thinking more that it is nice to be away from all the screaming."

"I told you prom wasn't worth it." Puck shrugged, noting Rachel's tiny frame jostle slightly from the movement. "And it doesn't matter anyway. Q's just doing it to make later more special."

"Later meaning …" she trailed off questionably, then realized what Puck meant.

He'd told her once that the bad thing about never really being in relationships is never reaping the benefits of makeup sex. Everyone said it was way hotter than regular sex, and Puck had been all too clear that once they entered that phase of their relationship that he was going to pick a fight with her just to test the theory (although they fought enough that picking one wouldn't actually be necessary). And while she wasn't sure Quinn and Finn weren't already having sex, Rachel figured having a big, public fight and then coming together in such a presumably intimate manner would make the act seem more special. In a cheap sort of way.

"Is that what you two talked about?"

Puck sighed, rubbing his hand up and down her back in warning before he lowered himself to the dock, his eyes cast up to the sky. He clasped his hands behind his head as he thought back to his conversation with Quinn. He hadn't had to chase her very far, the blonde obviously just waiting for someone to come after her when she'd all but accused Finn for settling for being a loser and bringing her down with him. She just had expected that person to be Finn, or at least someone who didn't open by calling her a crybaby bitch. In hindsight, it wasn't the best approach, as it led to a lot more mudslinging than he expected, but in the end the only thing he took away from it all was how much had changed in a year – and how _none_ of it had been Quinn.

"She said she thinks she would have won if she and I were together."

Rachel gasped softly, turning her torso to face him even though his eyes remained studied on the stars. She blinked a few times before crawling to his side, propping herself on her elbow and staring at the side of his face, waiting for him to talk. She already knew that he'd slept with Amber before (really, who hadn't?), but she highly doubted that was exclusively why people voted for her. The problem was the girls vote was entirely too spread out. There were ten girls on the ballot, whereas the boys had four. Two seniors who were jerks to most people, and Finn and Puck. Rachel saw Puck's win coming a mile away, and she'd be surprised if Quinn was even second.

When she realized Puck wasn't going to elaborate, she turned to her back and moved her gaze up high like his. She listened as the trees swayed in the background, watched the stars twinkle above her. There were moments like this at every turn, but Rachel never really noticed them before because she was always so busy. She was always running to the next lesson or class or volunteer center. Her mind was so focused on the future that she failed to really notice the present; it wasn't until she started dating Noah did she learn to just stop. Breathe.

"Do you wish you two were together still? Or, again?"

His eyes flicked to hers immediately, his head eventually turning, too. He waited for her to turn and look at him, and tried not to notice the way her hair fell to frame her face. Or how he could see flecks of the moon in her eyes as she stared back at him. They were things he wouldn't have dared to notice about anyone else, and yet given the sheer amount of time they'd spent together with nothing to look at _but _her eyes, it was hard not to note her graceful beauty. But, instead, he reminded himself that he owed her for sort of ruining their junior prom, and maybe telling your girlfriend the truth couldn't hurt.

"She asked me why I could be with just you and not just her," he admitted quietly, watching Rachel's expression carefully. The benefit of being forced to pay attention to someone so closely was that he'd learn how to read her better. He didn't have to hear what she said to know what she was thinking, and he could even hear what she wasn't saying when she did talk. The way she was biting her lip told him she was waiting to hear more before she spoke, which he knew wasn't easy for her. Then again, this wasn't exactly easy for him, either. "I didn't … I still don't really have an answer."

Rachel released her lip from her teeth's grip, letting the corners curve into a smile. There wasn't a lot of space between the two of them, but she scooted closer until her face was just centimeters from his, and then she kissed him. It started out slow and gentle, but kisses between her and Noah rarely settled into either of those adjectives. There was passion and electricity, and she wasn't sure but she liked to think it was exactly why she could keep him a one-woman man when no one else could.

Puck moved his left hand down her frame, curling his fingers around her bare knee and pulling her leg up and over his hip. She whimpered when he grounded into her, his knee lifting to keep her as secure as possible. Her hands were pressed against each side of his face, his moving to her lower back and bringing her impossibly close before one trailed down over the rough fabric of her skirt and then under. He groaned at the feel of her boy short panties on her legs, his fingers brushing the elastic on her leg while his palm laid flat on her ass.

Rachel released his lips on a gasp when he pinched her butt, his resulting cocky grin causing her to smile instead of smack him even if it wasn't enough to shut her up. "While Quinn, Finn and probably every single person at this party might not agree, I am of the mind that sex on prom night is far too cliché, Noah."

"Who said anything about sex?" He asked, continuing his exploration as he crashed his lips against hers again. She moaned when he pushed her to her back, not really changing their position much other than she was now on the bottom and he was on top. Her leg was still hiked up over his hip, and he was still using one arm to support his weight while the other continued its original journey. He took his time teasing her, running his fingers over the smooth expanse of her inner thighs before swiping them down and back up her rear. He forced her hips up with just a slight nudge from his knee, his hand removing the spandex underwear in a unrushed but quick motion before trailing back up her legs and then in between.

"Noah," she gasped, her head falling back and her body arching up as he teased her most private area. It wasn't the first time they'd done this – she was fairly fluent in baseball by now - but each time set her on fire and she thought she might literally burst into flames when he pushed his middle finger deep inside her. Rachel bit her lip hard and tried to remember they weren't exactly alone (how did this always happen?) but she couldn't help the high-pitched squeak that filtered out into the night air when her shifted his hand just enough to not just add another digit but to also roll his thumb over her tiny bundle of nerves.

"You like that?" He cleared his throat, fighting through the lust and focusing solely on her. Sex might be out of the question, but that didn't mean they couldn't climb another step on the ladder. "Can I make it better?"

"How?" She rasped out, thinking the possibility was highly unlikely. He just grinned in response and then started kissing her neck. His lips moved down to her collarbone and then her chest, nudging the hem of her shirt up with his nose just to caress the valley between her breasts with his lips and flutter over her stomach. Her eyes were closed at the sensation she felt building inside her, and then they shot open when she felt his mouth press against the area his hand had most recently been covering. She bit her lip when she met his gaze, her eyes slamming shut and her head falling back as soon as he darted his tongue out just once to swipe against her clit.

"Better?"

Rachel moaned in response, dropping her elbows so her back fell flat against the hard surface of the dock, her fingers clutching the loose fabric of the blanket below them. The stars above her looked more like the giant balls of fire she knew they were, everything a hazy color of red and orange as Puck continued to torture her with just his tongue. She didn't even have time to feel self-conscious, too lost in the feel of him between her legs, tasting, teasing, biting, kissing. Her head rocked from side to side, her eyes closing again when the cloudy red became too much. Like a volcano, her pleasure had been rumbling below the surface for too long and without warning it erupted out, Rachel's back arching up as she let out a strangled cry.

Puck continued his ministrations for a few more moments while Rachel came down from her high, eventually moving her skirt back into position and crawling up her frame. He planted a hard, purposeful kiss against her lips and then pushed himself up and over, collapsing onto his back in the spot he'd originally started in. He grinned listening to the sound of Rachel's harsh breathing mix along with the light rustling of the trees and the quiet crickets in the surrounding woods.

"That was …" Rachel struggled to find the words, something worth noting considering her affinity for using so many, and large ones at that.

"Cliché?" He joked, turning to face her. She noticed the twinkle in his eyes, and knew better than to think it was the moon reflecting inside the hooded orbs.

"Skinny dipping would have been cliché," she eventually responded, scooting closer to him. She let her arm drape across his stomach, her head resting on his chest while her legs tangled between his. She could feel the wind float up under her skirt and meant to look around for where he'd put her underwear, but she honestly wasn't sure she could move just yet. "That was something else entirely."

"Yea," he answered quietly, thinking back to his conversation with Quinn. She'd wondered why he was able to be monogamous with Rachel and not her, and he still wasn't sure he had any answers. But, at that moment – with his one hand dancing softly across Rachel's back while the other feathered across the arm she had secured over his stomach – he thought maybe it was because there was no comparison. It wasn't Quinn versus Rachel or even Rachel versus every other girl.

It was something else entirely.


	14. Cooking Up Maturity

**Author's Note:** If there ever was a filler chapter, this was it. I'm not entirely proud of it, but it has sort of grown on me, too. It shows a maturity that I think would be visible in Puck this late in the relationship with Rachel. But, whatever. Maybe I'm just justifying it. Oh well. I just hope you like it. Either way, **let me know**!

Major shout out to Jann for holding my hand through this part. Also, huge thanks to those reviewing. I wasn't even going to update today but the response to the last chapter was wicked awesome and when my ego is stroked so well, I can't help but update. Note for the future, maybe ... :)

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><p>Puck strolled into the Berry house without hesitation, closing the door and kicking off his shoes in the same motion. He knew Rachel's dads were neat freaks, which is precisely why he abided by their no shoes rule but with his own standards – leaving them carelessly in front of the door. He dropped his backpack somewhere between the foyer and the dining room, cutting through toward the kitchen. Normally he'd go right up to Rachel's room, but he could tell by the way the house was an easy ten degrees hotter than normal and the smell of baked goods wafting throughout the area that Rachel wasn't upstairs studying.<p>

"Babe?" He questioned comically, his eyes traveling over the countertops that were currently full of freshly baked treats. Cookies, brownies, granola bars, rice krispie treats. Anymore and she'd have to start stacking the snacks on top of each other or set up plates directly on the floor.

"I didn't hear you come in!" She greeted absently, her eyes scanning a recipe inside her small notebook before she started whipping the ingredients she'd just put in the bowl. She cradled the bowl in her arm, turning to face her boyfriend while still stirring the batter. "I'm making a cake!"

Puck surveyed the kitchen again, chuckling lightly. "Well, I guess that's the one thing missin'." She scowled at him, turning back around even as he entered the room more fully. "Why the urge to rival Betty Crocker?"

"While a presumptuous thought, I simply needed a break from studying." Rachel swiped the back of her hand over her forehead, ridding herself of the sheen of sweat she felt building on her skin. It was sweltering in the kitchen, and she'd told her fathers to turn on the central air before they left to run their errands, but they were on an eco-friendly run lately and had clearly ignored her. It was nice enough outside that she could open the windows, but knowing Ohio she'd just have to close them up again tomorrow. That might also be why her fathers didn't want to turn on the air, but whatever. "Did you bring your homework?"

"Yes, your majesty." Puck grinned, chomping into one of the cookies while she wasn't looking. It didn't do much good since he was chewing when she turned around, earning a scowl in response. "Just testin' 'em."

"Those cookies are for our teachers, Noah. I have a batch for each of my teachers as well as each of yours."

"What the Hell for?"

If possible, her scowl deepened. "To say thank you for educating us for the year. To wish them a fine summer break. Because it is a nice thing to do!"

"Because you're a brown noser," Puck added with a grin, finishing the cookie in one last bite. Rachel huffed out a breath, turning her back to him once again as she poured the batter into the two cake tins she'd greased up. "And, fine, okay. The cookies are for school. What's with the brownies and all the other shit?"

"The granola bars are for my dance class, this cake is for temple, the rice krispie treats are for the glee club, and the brownies are for your mom."

"Ma? Why does she get brownies?"

"Noah," Rachel turned around from placing the two cake trays inside the oven, noting the time on the clock visible over his shoulder. "You really don't know what today is, do you?"

Puck froze, his eyebrows lifting up as he quickly went through all the necessary calculations. He and Rachel got together in the middle of January, which would mean an anniversary of some kind was fast approaching if not already passed. But they hadn't really been known to celebrate dates in the past, and Puck figured if she didn't care at the three-month mark than he was probably in the clear for awhile. It wasn't her birthday. It wasn't his birthday.

"Is it her birthday?"

Rachel couldn't suppress the laugh that spilled out even as she shook her head. "Noah, it's Mother's Day."

"Fuck."

Puck had fallen asleep on Finn's couch after playing video games all night, and he'd missed Sarah's tradition of bringing their mother breakfast in bed. That's when he normally slipped out and ran to the store on the corner and picked up a card and some flowers. By the time he got home this morning, they'd left a note saying they had gone shopping and he was expected at dinner later tonight. He'd showered and dressed and came right over to Rachel's without even realizing he was a terrible son.

"She's never going to believe I made these, though."

"Well I would hope not." Rachel rolled her eyes, adding a gold star by her name on the card she'd placed on top of the brownie plate. "These are from me."

"You got _my_ mom a gift for _Mother's_ Day?"

"_Yes_," she answered in equal emphasis, not sure why he was suddenly speaking so much more loudly.

"Don't you think that's kind of …" he struggled to find the right words, "fucked up?"

Rachel stared at him blankly, his vulgarity long since ignored in their private conversations. "In what way specifically?" When he doesn't answer, as if the answer should have been obvious, Rachel bowed her head a little, her voice quieter than she usually allowed it to be. "I ran into my mother this morning." She twisted her hands in front of herself. "I was so upset that I just bought all these things to bake to distract myself, but it's hard to forget the significance of the day and how I never get to share that with someone."

Puck listened to her wade into a serious conversation, opening up to him about something that he knew was tough for her, but he couldn't help but remain rooted to his spot nearly ten feet away from her. Ms. Cochran wasn't just a sensitive topic for Rachel. The name had connotations for Puck, too, specifically related to a baby girl he fell in love with at first sight and then never saw again. A little girl who was half him even if he'd never know which half.

"She didn't see me, which was probably for the best. Our last interaction was certainly uncomfortable, and I can't imagine things being any better now that she hasn't just ignored me for seventeen years but … replaced me."

Puck inhaled a sharp breath, hearing the first mention of the daughter he never had. He could feel the blood rush by his ears and his fists clenched at his sides desperately. He knew what was coming and he _really_ wished he could stop it. He wished he didn't feel like this anymore, wished he could get past it all. But it was too much. Too real.

"She was so big, Noah," Rachel said gently, her eyes finally lifting off the floor and to him. She frowned at his expression, unable to discern if he was confused, upset, or bored. "I can't believe it's been a year."

"Stop!" His voice boomed in the space, not loud enough to shake the walls but it certainly shook Rachel. Puck's usually neutral expression or sly grin was replaced with a look of fury, his face flushed and his eyes looking at her in slits when he managed to tear them open. "Just … stop."

"Noah …" Rachel frowned, taking a step forward and then stopping and wrapping her arms around herself when he took a step back. "I know it's painful, but …"

Rachel blinked, her mouth still open in preparation to finish her sentence when Puck almost literally vanished before her eyes, the outline of where he'd been still visible he'd left so quickly. She heard the front door slam and his tires screech across her driveway and in front of her house before it was eerily quiet. It wasn't until ten minutes later when the oven let out a loud beeping sound did Rachel even move, her body on autopilot while her mind couldn't have been further away.

She set the cake tins out to cool and grabbed the plate of brownies she made for Mrs. Puckerman and walked out of the door. Puck lived almost entirely on the other side of town, but in a small town like Lima that really only meant it was about a fifteen-minute walk, ten at a brisk pace. Rachel spent the entire time thinking about what was said between the two of them and everything that wasn't said. She'd worked herself into such a frenzy that when she arrived at the Puckerman's – in twelve minutes – she walked right inside instead of knocking or even announcing her presence. She placed the brownies with the card on top on the table by the door and marched right up to Puck's room, shoving it open.

"That was extremely _rude_, Noah."

"Rach, go away." Puck was lying on his bed, his face buried deep in his pillow. He should have known she would follow him. "Seriously."

"Oh, _seriously_?" She scoffed, closing the door even though it was obvious his mother and sister weren't in the house. Rachel crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm sorry that talking about Beth upsets you so much, but _not_ talking about her isn't helping you, either."

He flipped over onto his back, lifting up from the bed and staring at her from across the room. He'd left to clear his head and now she wouldn't just stop talking. "This isn't about Beth. It's about you." She looked at him so smugly, as if she couldn't wait to hear what excuse he had to say such a thing, and he felt his temper rise in retaliation. "You might not know Shelby, but you're just like her!"

That did it. She was immediately quiet aside from the initial gasp.

"She came to the hospital and she just took Beth like she was hers all along and she wasn't. She was mine." Puck clenched his teeth together, his jaw tightening and loosening uncontrollably before he spoke again. "And now you're doing it with Ma. She's isn't yours. You can't just bake her shit for Mother's Day and think that is cool."

" I'm sorry that you are offended by me baking a plate of brownies for your mom for Mother's Day, but like it or not she's the closest thing I have to a real mom and I'm not going to feel ashamed or embarrassed by the fact that I want to give her a gift."

Puck groaned, hearing her start the whole wounded puppy sob story. She was in the middle of defending her fathers and how they tried to make it as normal for her as possible and how she wouldn't trade them for anything until suddenly she stopped. She shook her head and turned around, swinging the door open and walking through without another word. Aside from her descent downstairs, he could hear what had to be his mother and sister coming back from wherever they had been all afternoon, which Rachel must have heard beforehand, too.

"No, I'm afraid I can't stay for dinner, Mrs. Puckerman," he heard Rachel say as he came downstairs, his sister and mother regarding him with a scowl. Typical. "I simply wanted to drop off these brownies for you. I hope you enjoy them."

"I know I will. It was so very sweet of you to make them," Mrs. Puckerman gushed, following Rachel to the door and almost outside, standing in the frame until the tiny brunette was completely out of sight. Then she shut the door and turned to face her son, a frightening look in her eye. "What did you do?"

"Nothin'!" He defended quickly, ignoring Sarah's taunting as she walked by him up the stairs and to her room, swinging a bag from one of the stores in the mall.

"You did something, Noah. Now out with it." Mrs. Puckerman grabbed the plate of brownies and moved to the kitchen, Puck following simply because he knew she wasn't going to let it go. He fell to sit on the flimsy chair under the phone, his head falling back against the wall hard.

"Don't you think it's weird that she made you brownies?"

"No." Puck scoffed. Typical. "Rachel's a sweet girl, Noah. What's the harm in her making me a nice treat?"

"It's Mother's Day."

"I'm well aware." The way she said it made him know that she was subtly pointing out that he wasn't entirely out of the woods for missing a good portion of the day that was meant to be dedicated to her. As if he needed to be kicked while he was already down. "And I'm honored."

"It's just too Mr. and Mrs., ya know?"

Mrs. Puckerman managed to smile at her son's frustration, grabbing one of the chairs by the small table in the kitchen and setting it in front of him before sitting down. "While I still maintain that you are a good boy, I know you have this macho persona that you feel is necessary to display all the time. However, I also know that you can't be silly enough to believe that Rachel hasn't become an important part of your life recently." She gave him the eyes and he didn't bother trying to look away. "I've known that young woman for many years and having the opportunity to get to know her better because of your relationship has only made us closer."

Puck bowed his head, thinking he hadn't considered their previous relationship as grounds for the gift. While he and Rachel weren't really friends, they had known each other since they were little, and his mother had always gotten along with Rachel's fathers when they'd meet at the synagogue. His mom was crazy, but she was also really sweet and helpful when she wanted to be. He could remember one time during middle school when Rachel's dads had to go out of town and his mom and stopped in every day to check on the young girl to make sure she was safe.

"She's helped me with dinners and your sister with her homework. You're passing all your classes for the first time _ever_, I think." Mrs. Puckerman shook her head lightly, awe written on her face. "Maybe you aren't married – _yet_," she added with a grin and then spoke over his moan, "but that girl is a part of our family, Noah." The amusement faded, giving way to a more concerned expression. "And I think you of all people should respect the value in that kind of relationship, as you've had to deal with the loss of a family member."

He knew she was talking about Beth and not his father, and if it were possible, he felt worse, about everything. He was sorry for freaking out about Rachel seeing Beth and sorry he wasn't man enough just to talk through his pain. He was sorry he yelled at Rachel and made her feel bad for being a good person. But, most of all, he was sorry he didn't have anything to give to the woman in front of him, when all she'd done for him was give.

"I don't have a gift, but happy Mother's Day."

"I don't need a gift." She turned her cheek toward him and waited for his kiss before she looked him back in the eyes. "I just need you to go make it right with that girl."

Puck nodded in understanding, grabbing one of the brownies off the plate with a smile before walking out of the kitchen and then the house. He opted to walk to Rachel's house instead of drive, hoping the extra ten minutes would give him time to think of something good to say. Unfortunately, as he took the last six or so steps before he reached the stoop of the Berry house, he wasn't any surer about his apology as he was when he'd left. Figuring he was just going to wing it, Puck walked into the house and slipped out of his shoes, taking the steps two at a time and quietly knocking on Rachel's door.

"It's open," she announced in fake merriment, the sound of her voice breaking his heart a little. And, if it didn't, her crestfallen face certainly would have when she turned around and looked at him. Winging it didn't seem like a possibility then, his arm simply extending and presenting the brownie he still had in his hand. "Is that for me?"

"Made it myself," he answered, grinning only when he saw her roll her eyes. If his mom wouldn't have believed he made the brownies for her, Rachel certainly wasn't going to believe it either. The last time he was in the kitchen was for their bake sale from Hell for glee club last year and he hadn't exactly followed a recipe. But, when she put the treat down and then licked her finger free of some chocolate residue, he'd never wanted to learn to bake so badly in his life. Unfortunately that kind of thinking wasn't going to help him right now.

"Is it meant to be some sort of an apology?"

"You make I'm sorry cookies." He shrugged, feeling stupid – as he normally did whenever he had to do something in their relationship besides kiss and touch her and stuff. "Brownies are for when people really fuck up." Rachel just nodded and he honestly wanted to run his head through a wall. She never really made it easy on him. "I was a dick. The whole Beth thing … Ma … Mother's Day …" God, he wasn't even making full sentences now. "I like that you and Ma are tight. It sucks when y'all gang up on me and shit, but … it's cool."

"I love her, Noah." Rachel bit the inside of her cheek, figuring she was seconds away from adding to their daily fight total (it might be a new record), but she went on and said it anyway. "I love _you_."

He didn't know why it came as such a surprise to him. He'd heard her tell Jesse and knew she meant it. But hearing the words from her lips directed solely at him ... it was different. It meant something. It meant more, more than he'd ever thought it would mean, and more than he ever felt about anyone else. It meant everything. _She_ meant everything, and he wanted to tell her that. He wanted to be man enough to know that not everything had to be solved with a fight. He was already well aware that words sometimes had the power to destroy more than his fists, but they didn't have to just be used for destruction. Three little words could build something new for them, something that maybe wouldn't be like the house of cards his relationship with Quinn had been. It could be something permanent. Something bigger, better. Something more.

"Rachel." One of her fathers knocked on the slightly ajar door, pushing it open a little more and stepping more into view. "Your dad is starting to prepare dinner. Will Noah be joining us?"

Rachel looked back to Puck, letting him make the decision. He was still looking at her, trying to get his voice to work in conjunction with his brain and just say the words he could feel on the tip of his tongue. They weren't words he'd ever felt comfortable saying, nor had he ever had the urge to say them to any other girl. But Rachel wasn't just any girl. She was _his_ girl. She was his family, and not just the shitty one he was stuck with. She was the one he'd chose to be with, the only girl capable of keeping his attention for longer than three hours. And she'd picked him, too.

"I …" One word down. Two more to go. "I-I'd love to." Puck sighed, sagging his head in shame, wishing he wasn't such an emotional retard. "But I can't." He knew they wouldn't understand why he was suddenly so sad, or hear the double meaning in his last sentence. He wanted to say the words, more than definitely felt they were true, but he just couldn't do it. Not yet. "We're going to the old folks' home to see Nana and then out to dinner for Mother' Day."

"Well isn't that nice?" Rachel's father exclaimed, all three of them moving downstairs. Puck slowly put his shoes back on, wanting to at least say goodbye to Rachel properly but unable to since her father wouldn't leave. "Just know you are always invited for dinner, Noah."

"Thanks," he answered, surprise in his tone as he simply waved goodbye and then walked back home, thinking the whole time not about what Rachel had said but instead what her father had. Granted, it was the nicer of the two, but Puck had never been welcome in anyone's house. Hell, half the time he wasn't really welcome in his. But, hearing Rachel's father say he could come back any time, and knowing generally how hospitable they've been to him – even before him and Rachel started dating – Puck started to realize that maybe he'd had a limited view on the word family.

Yes, he lost Beth and that sucked, but giving her up might not have been just for her own good. If he and Quinn had kept her and tried to make it together, he knew he would have never been truly happy. Every day that she lived at the house was a nightmare, his mother and sister always on his case and the girls just screaming at each other the whole time. Now, with Rachel, he was able to see what life could be like in a normal family. Maybe it wasn't normal in the mom, dad, two-and-a-half kids, and a dog kind of way. But maybe that's what made it better.

They didn't plan to be together and become a family. Like them, it just … happened.


	15. Quick Waves of Pleasure

**Author's Note:** So this chapter marks a time in my brain where things took a serious turn. The fun factor got upped majorly in terms of writing, but I don't think y'all are going to agree as readers. That being said, I still want to hear what you think - no hate mail, mainly because it is unnecessary. I won't let y'all down; you guys are too awesome for me to want to see you sad! So trust me and enjoy!

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><p>Puck ducked his head back behind the shed by the pool, hiding in the shadows close enough that he could hear the conversations among his friends. Summer had officially started about a week ago, but since nationals weren't until the end of July, the glee club was still meeting once a week to rehearse. As it got closer and closer to their New York trip, the group would probably practice daily, which was precisely why the group needed moments like this where they could just chill. Things were just going to get more and more stressful and if they didn't make an effort to have some fun outside of the glee club, they were going to run into exactly the same problem they did at sectionals. They'd all hate each other and it would reflect in their performance.<p>

At that moment, Brittany and Santana were splashing around in the pool while Mike, Finn, Sam, and Artie watched intently, muttering between them about how hot the two girls looked in their bikinis. Quinn, Tina, and Mercedes were cackling over something pointless, and Lauren was in the house again working on plate number too many of the crazy spread Sam's mom put out for their party. Rachel, Kurt and Blaine were deconstructing everything they'd gone over in rehearsal earlier, making plans for the next month and a half like they were the only three in the whole club. When Mike started to walk from the group of guys to the girls, Puck decided to make his move.

Quick before anyone could give his intentions away, Puck darted out from behind the shed and threw his shoulder into Mike's side. The Asian sputtered out a loud half-question, only enough to earn everyone's attention as he tipped over and into the clear water of the pool. Brittany and Santana shrieked in mild horror as water splashed up and hit them higher than the bellybutton, their concern mostly over their hair. Tina's concern, however, was for her boyfriend, who was only underwater for a second or two before jostling up. His hands and arms moved erratically before he realized he could stand, lifting halfway out of the water and then in quick pursuit of his attacker.

"Noah!" Rachel half-chastised and half-warned, watching in mild amusement as Mike sprung out of the pool and after Puck.

Sam's house was like any other suburban piece of property, two stories that fit him, his mother and father, and his three younger siblings comfortably. The backyard, however, was huge. The pool was decent sized, but the yard to the side was enormous. If Sam hadn't just transferred to McKinley, it would be easy to picture him as a boy with his father in the backyard, tossing the football from one side of the yard all the way to the other. They'd already seen his siblings and their friends playing a rousing game of tag before Sam's mother and father piled the whole crew into the car and left for an undetermined amount of time, giving the teens some privacy.

"And I thought Finn was a giant man child." Kurt rolled his eyes, his attention moving from Tina as she yelled at Mike to quit wasting his energy threatening Puck. "Did you know I had to wake him up for glee rehearsal today? At noon. Really?"

Rachel giggled lightly, nodding her head. "I understand completely. My fathers invited him for brunch once at the beginning of last summer and I don't think I heard the end of it."

"It's summer," Finn defended quickly, entering the conversation without invitation and with a scowl. "We're supposed to stay up late and wake up even later."

"Guess I didn't get the memo." Kurt rolled his eyes again, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Did you also miss the memo that this is a pool party?" Puck asked, coming to stand next to Rachel when Mike finally went inside with Tina and Mercedes for some food. "If anyone could use a tan, it's you, pasty."

"Awfully eager for me to undress, Puckerman," Kurt joked, earning a round of laughter from Blaine, Rachel, and Quinn, who'd come over to stand by Finn – likely after seeing his proximity to Rachel.

Quinn and Finn were doing better since the blowout at prom, but the strain in their relationship was fairly obvious to those who knew them best. Without winning prom queen, Quinn had started to lose interest in Finn. Likewise, with Quinn's intentions and expectations becoming clearer and clearer, Finn started to wonder if they were together for the right reasons. He wasn't necessarily sure what the wrong reasons were, though, which is why they were still officially a couple.

"Puck's right, Kurt," Blaine intercepted before Puck could respond to Kurt's teasing, stepping back from the group and peeling off his T-shirt. He stepped over one of the lounge chairs by the pool and sat in the next one, patting the seat of the one he'd bypassed with his hand in invitation. "Let's soak up the rays while we can. You know it's going to be raining tomorrow."

"I'm afraid I have to side with Kurt on this one." Rachel tilted her head up to regard her boyfriend even if she was talking to everyone around her. "Do you know how many cases of skin cancer are a direct result of overexposure to sunlight and the harmful UV-rays emitted from it?"

"Who cares?" Kurt left the group, sitting in the chair directly beside Blaine with a doofy, happy grin wide across his face.

Rachel whipped her head back toward Kurt, her mouth opening in rebuttal but then closing when she saw how happy Kurt looked. Instead, she noted Brittany, Santana, and Artie moving to the inside of the house, Finn and Quinn breaking off to follow, too. She angled her body more directly toward Puck, cocking her head to the right instead of up to avoid the sun peaking over his silhouette.

"That wasn't a very nice thing you did to Mike, Noah."

"It had to be done, babe. And it was him or Wheels." Rachel gasped slightly. "See. I'm growin'."

She rolled her eyes. "If you were really showing personal growth, you'd think of a less inappropriate nickname for Artie."

"We're cool. He's my boy." Puck stepped closer to her, though there wasn't much room between them to begin with. "Let's stop talkin' and get wet, huh?"

"While I'm well aware that you have selective hearing, usually you at least _listen_ to what I have to say." Rachel placed each of her hands on her hips, her stance doing little to show irritation when she made no move to step away from him. They'd been together for a good portion of the day, but they hadn't really been close. Glee rehearsal was dedicated to choreography for their last song, where Rachel and Puck were practically separated by every other member in the club no matter where they moved. She wanted to teasingly reprimand him for his juvenile behavior, but she wanted to be near him more.

"I'll keep you covered, babe." His voice was so low that even Rachel had trouble hearing him, which seemed impossible when he somehow managed to step even closer, no space between them now. His hands fell to her hips and toyed with the scratchy fabric of the towel-like shawl she was wearing over her swimsuit. He inched the garment up slowly, actually growling when his fingers touched the bare skin of her thigh.

Rachel sighed blissfully as soon as he made contact, her hands moving from in front of her to rest on his bare chest. His skin was warm and while it was likely because he'd been outside in the sun shirtless for the past hour or so, Rachel liked to think she was partially the cause. That his blood was boiling because of her just the way hers was for him. She swallowed thickly, leaning her head back in an effort to remove his lips from her neck so she might actually be able to speak.

Unfortunately, Puck took the space she created as an opportunity to rid Rachel of the piece of clothing over her swimsuit, his fingers deftly tugging at the front zipper until both of them were left watching the garment pool at their feet. He growled again at the sight of her purple polka dot halter bikini, his hands _and_ lips returning to their original position. Rachel let out a breathy sigh right next to his ear that almost pushed him to move things to the next step, but then both of them heard Blaine and Kurt cough loudly.

Kurt laughed at the cloudy gaze both Rachel and Puck returned to him. "Since you, too, have abandoned your avoidance of the sun, you might want to put this on." He tossed a bottle of sunscreen to Rachel, grinning when Puck caught it out of reflex. "It's waterproof so it should still protect you even while you're melting under Puck's touch."

"Kurt!" Rachel blushed profusely, biting her lip even as she heard Puck chuckle. She was still a little out of it, and she hated that he could bounce back so effortlessly.

"This is SPF 50, whitey." Puck tossed the bottle back, rolling his eyes when Kurt just watched it fall onto the chair and then the ground. "Got anything over there not meant for albinos?"

"Here." Blaine flung a bottle of SPF 30 lotion toward the couple, not even looking or lifting his sunglasses up as he did so. Luckily he was the more athletic of the two, the bottle landing perfectly in Puck's hands.

"That was Finn's," Kurt defended absently, going back to lounging with Blaine, the two talking quietly between themselves.

"Should have known," Puck remarked comically, noting the tall teen come back out with Quinn, his swim shirt still in place. Quinn was barely wearing enough fabric to constitute a bathing suit – she'd lost the very last of her leftover baby fat for prom - so the two oddly enough balanced each other out. "Turn around, Berry."

"You do me, I do you?" She asked coyly as she turned, piling her hair on top of her head and securing it with the elastic band that was around her wrist. Despite the heat, Rachel actually shivered when she felt Puck's breath dance across her neck, but she blamed it on the coolness of the lotion. It didn't have anything to do with his gentle touch as he rubbed the protection into her skin, the lotion and his care equally seeping into her. Absolutely nothing.

"OK. Now the front."

Rachel rolled her eyes, taking the bottle from his hands. "I think I can handle that on my own, Noah."

"I insist." She didn't give in, no matter how charming he was trying to be. "Alright fine. Damn independent women," he muttered, turning around so she could rub the sunscreen on his back when she was done applying it to her arms, legs, and chest. She moved deliberately over his shoulders and down his back, taking long, slow swipes to massage the lotion onto his skin. Instinctively, he turned when she was done, Rachel's hand trailing from his lower back to his stomach. His abs clenched at the contact, her eyes watching in fascination before moving up his torso and then his face.

"All done," she choked out, inwardly wondering what was coming over her. The past few weeks had been one tortuous example after the next regarding her lack of control when it came to Puck, and today it seemed to be on overdrive. Everything she did – even if it was in an effort to alleviate the urge -only made her want to do more, and it was then that she wondered why she was fighting it so hard. What was she waiting for?

"We're going inside to get some food," Kurt interrupted again, forcing the two teens apart as he and Blaine walked between them and into the house with everyone else.

Rachel ducked her head with a shy smile, moving to sit on the edge of the pool while Puck walked to the stairs and into the water. Quinn and Finn were in the hot tub in the far back of the property, visible but far enough away that neither teen felt awkward when Puck waded over to rest between Rachel's thighs. Her feet instinctively locked behind his lower back, his hands massaging the bare skin of her thighs.

"You look _good_, babe." Puck again let his eyes trail over her body, pleased by the swimsuit-to-skin ratio. "But I think you'd look better in here."

"I'm fine settling for satisfactory," she said, grinning wildly as his hands trailed down her legs to her feet. He tickled the sensitive flesh, causing her to tighten her grip around him and therefore bring the two of them closer. She pressed her palms into the concrete behind her and leaned back, trying to create some distance. "I told you I'm not a very good swimmer."

"It's the shallow end," he answered bemused. "There's like two feet of water." Without warning, Puck wrapped an arm around her waist and lifted her up enough that when he moved she came with him. Her hold around his waist tightened even more, her arms quickly circling his neck to secure her body to his. "I won't let you drown, babe."

Rachel kept her grip around him tight but pulled back slightly, looking into his eyes and wondering if he understood the other way she could take that sentence. She knew he couldn't, not just because he was Puck and a man and therefore didn't conceptualize all thoughts to center around one main theme. But also because if he did, then he'd know he couldn't save her. When it came to him, she had already drowned. She was in entirely over her head, so deep in love with him that the only thing she could do was swim in the feeling and hope it lasted forever.

"Noah!" She warned when he started walking further and further away from the stairs, closer to the end of the pool.

Puck smirked, relishing in the feel of her writhing her body against his. He walked all the way to the end of the pool – it still was only a little more than five feet deep – and pressed her back against the wall. He lifted one of his knees to secure her to the wall, pressing his torso into hers. When she opened her mouth to no doubt lecture him about exploiting her trust, he covered it with his own, thrusting his tongue inside for good measure. He could taste her words as he swallowed them, lapping up her following moan with another plunge of his tongue. He nipped softly at her lips and then moved down to her jaw and neck as he fought for air.

Rachel sighed, her argument falling away as her head hung backward in response to Puck's attention. Her nails scratched up from his shoulders, her fingers running up his neck and then across the back of his head. They tangled in the short strands of his Mohawk, Rachel managing to fist the small amount of hair enough to pull his head back so she could crash her lips back against his. Her tongue invaded the moist cavern of his mouth, exploring territory that she had long claimed as hers until she had to pull back again for air.

"Cannonball!" Mike shouted right before he landed in the water, a giant wave sweeping over Puck and Rachel followed by another and then another when Sam dropped Artie into the water and then jumped into the pool himself. Mercedes, Tina, and Lauren showed up in their periphery, Kurt and Blaine went back to their lounge chairs, and Brittany and Santana joined Finn and Quinn in the hot tub. Within seconds their secluded little bubble was burst.

"Guess that's why you stay out of the deep end," Puck tried to joke, clearing his throat in an effort to make his voice sound a little less affected while gingerly trying to wipe some of the water that had splashed onto them off Rachel's face.

"Whereas I was thinking I want to go deeper." Rachel licked her lips, noting the numb feeling simply to distract herself from the sudden jolt of nerves she felt rip through her stomach. Puck's neck almost snapped in two at her whispered words, his eyes hot on her in an entirely different way than they had been just moments before. There were questions hiding in the hazel depths, and Rachel just nodded her head ever so slightly, smiling in return to Puck's sudden wide grin.

"Rach and I are going inside for some food," he announced to no one, helping Rachel out before lifting himself out of the water. She grabbed his hand first, leading him around the pool, up the deck, and then into Sam's house. She looked back at him just once as she moved through the downstairs, then again at the top of the stairs before turning left and into the guest bedroom. The two entered quietly and he leaned against the door to close it, turning the small knob to lock it with one hand while the other tightened around hers and pulled her back toward him.

She stumbled against his chest and he kissed her roughly, responding to the feel of her bare skin pressed intimately against his body. Rachel immediately removed her hand from his, both of them coming up to rest on his shoulders for a second before dancing across his back. He left his one arm secure around her waist, the other ghosting up her spine until he reached the nape of her neck. The tiny strings of her bikini top wove between his fingers, and in one swift motion he untied the knot holding the halter top up. In another quick movement, he undid the knot on her back and then snaked his hand between their bodies and ripped the garment from her body, feeling her nipples harden instantly.

"Noah," she sighed the second her lips left his, her head falling back. Her knees felt weak and no matter how hard she tried to hold herself against him, she felt like she was slipping. Falling, rather, deeper and deeper into oblivion considering the incessant way Puck's lips attacked her body. First her lips, then her neck, and now he was moving across her collarbone to her chest. She felt his teeth nip at the valley of her breasts before he licked his way to the left, sucking in her right nipple. She pressed her lower half into him harder, causing them both to moan.

Puck finished paying her boobs the rightful amount of attention before he trailed his lips back up to her mouth. He kissed her slower than before, passionate enough that she paid little mind to his hands, which moved in tandem down her back until reaching the curve of her ass. He pulled her against him and growled at the friction before letting his hands dip just a little further down to lift her up. Rachel eagerly complied, wrapping her legs around his waist all while continuing to kiss him as he finally moved them away from the door and to the bed.

Rachel pried her eyes open only after she felt her back hit the mattress, Puck running his tongue all the way down her neck and torso until finally reaching the only part of her that was still covered. She mewled when he bypassed the area to place soft kisses on her inner thighs, his tongue moving all the way down to her calf before he started his climb back up.

"Please, Noah," she begged when he kissed the back of her knee, biting the sensitive skin and then running his tongue over the faint wound. Her eyes closed again but it only made her notice everything more, sucking in a sharp breath when she felt his hands creep up her legs until reaching her hips. He undid the ties on each side of the bathing suit bottom tortuously slow, kissing her inner thigh just as he peeled away the offending garment. She was left completely bare for about four seconds, Puck's mouth quickly covering the exposed area.

Her breath hitched in her throat, Rachel swallowing hard as her back arched up and her head fell back. Puck swept his tongue flat over her and then dipped between her folds, alternating between slow swipes over her slit and the small bundle of nerves at the top and spearing into her center with fast, hard thrusts. Her thighs clenched around his head when he gently bit her, trapping him where he'd told her once was one of his favorite places no matter how much she'd tried to change his mind. Doing so, however, simply pressed his nose right into her clit, causing Rachel to shriek out in pleasure before eventually coming completely undone.

Puck pulled back slowly, groaning as his painfully hard erection shifted in his board shorts. The thin fabric did little to hide his excitement, Rachel's eyes fluttering open and honing right in on the area. Her hands came out to stop his descent, landing on his chest and pushing him gently back up to a standing position. Basically eye level with his junk, Rachel undid the Velcro securing his shorts to his hips, the swim trunks falling to his feet as soon as they were loose enough. Without hesitation, she wrapped her mouth around him, engulfing him entirely. His hands swept into her hair in reflex, yanking the elastic band away from the chocolate tresses so he could fist the strands in his hands as she bobbed up and down.

Despite how hard he fought it, his eyes fell closed, his head slacking forward weakly. His breath was shallow and unsteady, harsh puffs of air coming out whenever her tongue swiped over his tip. When she moved to take him deeper, her lips surrounding the base of his shaft and his tip pressed against the back of her throat, Puck's eyes shot open. The visual just made it worse, and then she started humming the song from their rehearsal today and he felt _everything_.

"S-shit. Stop." He pulled on her hair, forcing her off him. They were both panting, their eyes eventually meeting. "If you want more than just this, you gotta stop."

"I want more," she answered quickly, her chest heaving as she stared up at him eagerly.

Puck closed the distance between them, their lips colliding with one another's. His arm wrapped around her back again and forced her further up on the bed, his body mirroring her own and then covering hers once they were both fully on top of the mattress. She sighed at the feel of his weight pressed into her, and while his one hand was trapped underneath her, the other cascaded languidly down her side. He barely grazed her left leg before it widened in invitation, Rachel rocking her hips up dangerously.

"How much more?"

His voice was low, husky. It seared through her more than his touch, which was saying something. Her throat was dry and she found herself licking her lips to wet those, too. "All of it," she panted, her eyes finally opening and then widening when she saw him returning her gaze. "I want it all."

Puck nodded and went to pull away but she curled her hands around his sides hard enough that he stopped. If there was ever a question a guy didn't want to ask in this situation, it was the one falling from his lips at that moment. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing." Rachel bit her lip, feeling a blush rise on her cheeks but fighting through it as she spoke. She loosened her grip, but kept him close. "It's just … I'm on the pill." He blinked a few times, and she decided he needed more information. "I know condoms are used to prevent more than just pregnancy, but you donated blood a couple of weeks ago before school let out and they don't let you do that if you're … diseased."

Puck had never been gone bareback before. The condom broke with Quinn, and they'd even used them the couple times they'd done it during the pregnancy, too. He wasn't exactly sure why, but he guessed it had to do with her not trusting him to tell her the truth about him being clean. Then again, Rachel didn't just take his word for it but rather made sure herself, but that wasn't really the point. The point was his girlfriend was not only letting him take her virginity, but she was letting him do it without any barrier between them at all.

"I thought maybe this was something I could give you that you hadn't experienced before." She bit her lip, wondering if that sounded as creepy as she suddenly felt – like she'd been planning this. "Something we could share together."

He slammed his lips against hers, sliding his tongue along hers as soon as her mouth opened. The need he'd been feeling for the past five months and had done a pretty damn good job at keeping under wraps suddenly burst to the surface. It consumed him the way she once described her desire for him, and he hoped she still felt that way. Moving to center himself between her legs, he released her lips with a ragged breath and caught her gaze through hooded eyes.

Rachel knew he was looking for reassurance, and any doubt she might have had was erased simply by him making sure she was sure. She pressed her hands flat against his chest, her eyes noting her right hand's placement over his heart. She bit her lip, watching him look at the same spot and then slowly both their gazes met again.

"I love you," she whispered, lifting her hips just enough that he pushed into her. She gasped at the initial pain she felt spread through her, and then gasped again at the next thing he said.

"Fuck, I love you."

It was likely a number of factors. The gentle way she had touched him and the soft spoken words of endearment. The emotional baggage of him finally saying the words that he'd meant for quite some time now. Rachel's tight center sheathing him entirely in a heat that rivaled the sun's. And maybe each of those individually wouldn't have been enough to cause it, but when they all combined, Puck couldn't handle it. His eyes slammed shut and he managed only a thrust or two before he completely lost it, spilling into her with a heavy grunt.

Rachel's chest rose and fell harshly as she wrapped her arms around his neck, but Puck pulled back almost instantly. She blinked and tried to catch his gaze but he refused to look at her. He simply lifted off the bed and scrambled to replace his board shorts. She sat up in panic, covering herself as best she could as she watched him with furrowed brows, a squeak escaping when he stepped backward toward the door.

"Sorry, I gotta go," he mumbled, his head down. "Sorry."


	16. Scared of Being Broken

**Author's Note:** I'm updating today for a few reasons. 1) The response to the last chapter was INCREDIBLE. Seriously, you guys rock my world. 2) This chapter isn't that long (even though it packs a powerful punch). 3) Some people seemed a bit confused, so I wanted to try to clear some of that up as quickly as possible (though I think one reviewer said it best by saying that Puck pulled a Finn. LOL!).

Ultimately, thank you everyone for reading and especially to those reviewing. Y'all knew it wasn't going to be fun and games the whole time, but you're still sticking with me and that is awesome. There's only four more chapters after this one, and I promise it's going to be a good time. Let me know if you agree (or if you don't agree!)!

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><p>Rachel tried to busy herself in her room, spending hours reorganizing her dresser drawers and closet. She had two full garbage bags of old clothes and glee costumes that she didn't need anymore; her father was going to drop them off at Goodwill tomorrow on his way to work. He'd offered in a very concerned voice and with a shocked expression, the newspaper he'd been reading nearly falling out of his hands when Rachel had come downstairs for the first time that day. Both her fathers knew better than to ask what was going on, allowing Rachel to keep herself isolated for as long as she felt it necessary.<p>

But it had been a few days now.

Her fathers weren't careless enough to say his name, but when she did go downstairs, she could see it in their eyes. She'd been perfectly content at Brittany's party and then came home in a rush of emotion that night. Since then, she had barely spoken more than a few sentences to either of them, which was not common practice for Rachel Berry. It all screamed of heartbreak, and frankly the Berry dads weren't sure how to handle the situation.

Rachel's breakup with Finn had been easy. And maybe that was because she was already starting to fall for Puck, but even the first time with Finn hadn't been that bad. There were some tears shed and some sad stories told over a pint of ice cream, but aside from that she was still Rachel. She still woke up at the crack of dawn and went about her daily routine, still went to her voice lessons and dance lessons. Even though the breakup between her and Jesse had been humiliating and somewhat emotionally damaging, Rachel was so determined to be the bigger person that she completely bypassed the pain that usually accompanied breakups.

That luxury was not a possibility if she and Puck were to breakup.

That's where the situation had gotten tricky, though. According to Rachel, the two teens _hadn't_ broken up. She said there was an obvious misunderstanding, and that she was sure her and Puck would work it out eventually. As soon as he texted her back.

Or answered her calls.

Or visited.

She sighed, literally shaking those thoughts from her brain as she came to sit on the edge of her bed. Her hand lifted unsteadily to move some hair from in front of her face to behind her ear, Rachel taking slow, deep breaths as she thought back to a few days ago. The entire day had been perfect. Things were so stressful lately as they all prepared for nationals, and the pool party was the perfect way to kick off the summer right. Even though they all didn't get along all the time, the day had been filled with good times and laughter.

And what happened between her and Noah … it was just how Rachel imagined it to be. Maybe not before when she used to think it had to be at a certain time and a perfect place and with roses and candles and all kinds of other stuff. It was a different kind of perfect, one she felt was much more realistic and special. Their time together throughout the day had been like hours of foreplay. When they finally made it to that secluded room, Rachel _needed_ him. She'd never felt that way before with anyone else, and it was a feeling she'd had numerous times (all the time) when she was with Noah. It was how she knew that she was ready. It was how she knew that she wanted it to be him. Always wanted it to be him.

And now … she didn't know what to believe. He'd left so quickly after their moment that she couldn't help but flashback to that first kiss with Finn in the auditorium. He'd sprung up so quickly and left mumbling for her to keep it all a secret that Rachel thought she could actually feel her heart break. He had been ashamed of what they'd done, and now she was worried that Puck felt the same way.

"Rachel, honey." Her dad knocked on the door then poked his head inside, giving her that same pathetic look he had for the last few days. Rachel tried to plaster on a smile, but she knew it was too late. She'd been caught. "Noah is downstairs." Rachel's heart leapt into her throat. "Do you want him to come up?"

"Yes, please!"

Rachel didn't care if she sounded anxious. Her hands wringed nervously on her lap, her eyes glued to the door until he pushed through. And that's the moment her heart fell from her throat into the very pit of her stomach. She'd seen him look bad before. He'd come to school drunk a few times last year, and the whole month or so after Beth's birth wasn't his finest hour. But this ... tonight … he looked _wrecked_. His cheeks were slightly sunken, bags under his eyes. He had some scruff on his face and she wasn't positive but she swore he was wearing the same thing he had been at Sam's party over his swim shorts.

"Hey," he greeted lamely, testing his voice. It came out low and scratchy, rough if only because he hadn't spoken since his hasty exit from the party three days ago. It had nothing to do with the way she was looking at him. Or the gnawing ache in his chest. Or the raw burning feeling in his throat he got every time he even _thought_ about what he was about to say. "We need to talk."

Rachel nodded her head in agreement, sighing a little in relief. He'd said the same thing before the championship game and even though he'd chickened out, she knew what he'd planned on saying was good. So, given her powers of deduction, she had to assume this would be good news, too. Something had happened but he'd worked it out on his own just like he always did and now he was here to tell her about it. They'd have another one of their defining moments where they grew stronger as individuals and closer as a couple.

"It's over."

Rachel gasped, her hand flying to her mouth in a failed attempt to hide her shock. Her eyes immediately welled up with tears, and she just let the salty water pool and then fall down her cheeks as she stared at him. It was a rare occasion for Rachel to be speechless, but she didn't even know where to begin. He had to be joking. She had to have misunderstood him. This couldn't be real.

Puck kept his gaze down, totally acting like a pussy – but then again he should be used to that by now. Only a pussy would spend Friday nights with his girlfriend, mom, and little sister. Only a pussy would trade hours of studying just to see his girlfriend strip. Only a pussy would wait five months to have sex and then totally blow it.

"Why?" She croaked out after too much time passed in silence. Puck had started pacing and his anxiousness was pushing her over the edge. She wanted to reach out and stop him, calm him down, but she knew it would just make things worse. Apparently it wasn't her job to soothe his nerves anymore.

"Look at me!" He exclaimed, gesturing to himself. He knew he looked crazy. He was breathing heavily for no reason, sweat starting to form on his brow. He was a mess, and it had everything to do with the girl sitting in front of him. She had done this to him, and he had to undo it. He had to go back to how things used to be, back when everything made sense.

None of this made sense. Relationships. Love. It was all crazy and not him. He shouldn't care that she looked like she was seconds away from sobbing uncontrollably. He shouldn't care so much about having this conversation that he couldn't eat for the past three days. He shouldn't care enough that he could actually feel his heart breaking. None of it should matter. This wasn't _him_.

He was Puck. Puckasaurus. Resident badass of Lima. He needed to drop the dead weight and get his head back in the game. Monogamy was for ugly guys who couldn't do any better. It wasn't for fuckin' studs in high school. He'd settle down with some chick later, but now wasn't the time for that. He was supposed to be having fun. Getting into trouble and girls' pants. That's it. That's all he was good for. Just a guy who could win a fight and screw someone senseless. _That's_ who he was and she'd changed all that. She'd _broken_ him.

"This is who I am," he announced proudly, straightening his posture and letting her take a real good look. Her eyes never moved from his, though, and it was him who had to look away instead. He couldn't stand to see the reflection of himself inside her glassy eyes. She still looked at him with too much pride, too much love. He wanted her to see the truth. To see that he'd failed her. That no matter what, he'd always fail her. _That's_ who he was. A failure.

"I know who you are," she said, confusion in her tone. She was looking right at him, had seen him nearly every day for the past five months not to mention their entire relationship beforehand. Who else could he be? Who else did he think he was? "I just … I don't understand how that means we're over."

"I'm not meant to be tied down."

Rachel sighed, not wanting to have this conversation but wishing it weren't like pulling teeth. Puck might as well have been grunting his answers and dragging his knuckles across the floor, but his complete ape-like behavior did nothing to lessen the blow of his words. He was going on and on in a rush of Tarzan-like sentences about how he was a man and men were meant to be men and Rachel's head was spinning the whole time.

How could she have gotten it so wrong?

This wasn't like the time with Finn when just basically imagined the whole relationship. She and Puck had jumped through a number of hoops to be together and it had been real. It meant something, she knew it did. It couldn't have been just about the chase. It wasn't that he'd gotten what he wanted from her and now he was leaving. He'd told her he loved her, and he'd meant it. It might have come out during a time where Rachel could guess that he wasn't entirely in his head, but he'd said it and that had been the real struggle. Because she knew he'd felt it long before then. She _knew_ he did.

But how could he love her and still do this to her? To _them_?

"You said you loved me."

Puck looked at her just once and then knew he couldn't anymore. If he was ever going to get through this, he'd have to keep his eyes down and ignore the way her eyes lit up when she first saw him. Forget how her hair rested across her face and how her clothes clung perfectly to her frame. He couldn't think about her skin pressed against his or how his name sounded whispered from her lips. That was in the past. This was about the future, about making it right.

"Yea, well." He shrugged. "I said a lot of things."

"No!" Her voice boomed in the small bedroom, her face immediately flushing red. Her eyebrows knitted together and she blew out a heavy, hard breath. "No. You do not get to stand there and just … _destroy_ everything. You can't stand there and tell me it all meant nothing! You _can't_!"

"Hell I can't. This is what I do. _This_ is who I am!"

"No, it's not." Rachel shook her head from the left and to the right, tears cascading down her cheeks. But she talked through her pain. She spoke over the sound of her heart breaking. "This is who you pretend to be. But I know you. _I_ know who you are and you're only doing this because you're scared."

"The fuck? I am _not _scared!" He growled, squaring his shoulders and stuffing his hands inside the pockets of his jeans. "I ain't scared of shit!"

"Yes, you are." She wasn't even challenging him. She was just telling him _exactly_ how it was. If he wasn't going to care about hurting her feelings, then she sure as Hell wasn't going to worry about hurting his. "You're scared of being a Lima Loser." His eyes flashed with anger, but she kept talking. "You're scared of Beth hating you when she's older. You're scared of ending up like your father. And, _most of all_, you're scared that someone could love you for _exactly_ who you are." She sniffed, keeping his gaze even as his faltered. "Because I do know who you are. And it isn't this … this _jerk_. I wouldn't have fallen in love with or shared something so special with a jerk."

Puck scoffed at the word special and that was enough to bring Rachel back from heartbroken to pissed off. She set her jaw and brushed past him on her way to her bedroom door. She turned the knob and opened the door, standing clear of the entryway as she held it open. Then she turned her gaze back on him, her stare hard.

"But if you're so determined to be the type of person who would throw something like this away to save face, then … well, good riddance, _Puck_."

He blinked a few times and watched her, his hands shaking inside his pockets before he finally sagged his head and walked through. He jumped a little when the door slammed behind him, letting out a heavy breath and trudging down the steps. He could feel Rachel's fathers staring at him from their spot in the living room while he put his shoes back on, but he didn't dare look at them. He just rushed out of the house and back into his car, swiftly pulling out of the Berry driveway with the intention never to come back.

Not that he'd be invited back. Not after what had happened. It was weird thinking about how little time had passed since Rachel's dad had said he was welcome whenever to now, when Puck was pretty sure he'd only be welcomed in the backyard near a newly dug hole and a loaded shotgun. But then again Puck was well aware that things could change in an instant. All it took was one slushie, one pregnancy test, one _girl_. One girl who wanted so much that it was impossible to make her happy.

Rachel always wanted more. She saw it as a flaw, wanting everything too much, but he always thought it had been kind of cool, how she constantly demanded more from everyone and everything. Then he started being one of those things. She'd put so much pressure on him, put him on such a high pedestal that he couldn't help but worry about falling. And he had to fall. It was scary at the top.

Not that he was scared.


	17. Deny the Fireworks

**Author's Note:** OK, not only did I receive NO death threats, but the response to the last chapter was amazing. I'm seriously overwhelmed with gratitude right now, you guys don't even know. I'm so happy you are enjoying what I'm writing, and I can't wait to hear what you think about the remaining chapters. Seriously, if I hit 200 reviews, I might freak out. ANOTHER prize will most definitely need to be rewarded ...

Regardless, thank you very much and enjoy!

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><p>Rachel meandered back to her spot on the large blanket they'd laid out over a random section of grass, squatting down to a small part of the fabric that wasn't occupied. Kurt and Mercedes were chattering mindlessly about the people walking around the fair, ripping them apart for anything from their clothes to their speech to the items they might have bought from one of the vendors at the festival. It was Fourth of July weekend and in Lima that meant a giant fair was set up on the high school campus, with kiosks of small businesses looking for new clientele and food vendors hoping for some extra revenue. There were kids' activities in one section, dunk tanks, clowns, and inflatable playhouses set up for their enjoyment. This year there was even a petting zoo, thankfully located on the far right corner of the festival – far enough away that the smell couldn't make it over to where everyone had set up their blankets and chairs for when it was time to watch the fireworks.<p>

The two aforementioned friends had forced Rachel to come against her own will, citing tradition and "girl" bonding. It wasn't that she didn't enjoy the festival. In fact, Fourth of July was strangely one of her favorite holidays. She liked the excitement of the day and was a sucker for fireworks. There was something about the way it commanded the entire sky, demanding attention from every single person that Rachel saw value in. Unfortunately, it had only been a few weeks since her and Puck's breakup, and Rachel still wasn't in the festival mood.

She wasn't exactly moping around anymore, though that was apparently up for debate. Her fathers were constantly on her case for not "being herself" anymore, and if Kurt and Mercedes' death threats were any indication, they were of the same state of mind. Honestly, she was trying. She put on her happy face during glee and hadn't stopped going to her voice lessons or her dance lessons aside from that first couple of days right after the breakup. It was easy to pretend to be fine when she still hadn't seen or heard from Puck since that night in her bedroom.

She'd gone to the glee practice almost a week after the breakup, and she wasn't really surprised when Puck hadn't been there. Nor was she surprised to know that everyone had found out about the breakup. Almost everyone was generally sympathetic, even Santana, which was only a little weird. She figured it was because they all knew they needed Rachel to have a chance at Nationals, but she wanted to believe it was more than that. She wanted to believe they were finally her real friends, which was precisely why she asked both Mike and Artie as friends of hers (and friends of Puck's) to make sure Puck came to the practices. Not for her, but for the team.

And he had, evidently. Rachel had been excused from the group to work on her solo, working on the dance numbers on her own time. But she had heard he came last week and the week before. Kurt said he looked like a dump truck hit him repeatedly and dragged him to practice, and even though he said it with a smile and in hopes that it would somehow cheer her up, Rachel couldn't help but feel her heart constrict. It was probably for the best, though, for her to feel that way since it kept her inspired for the song she'd written. It was a ballad, of course, and there was so much truth in the words that she had yet to get through the whole thing without crying. Hence the reason Mr. Schue wanted her to focus on perfecting it.

"What in God's name are you eating?" Kurt questioned loudly, his nose scrunched up in disgust as he evaluated Blaine and then Finn's plate.

"It's a chili cheese footlong hot dog." Finn licked his lips, taking the first bite that for anyone else would have been closer to three. He moaned appreciatively, chili sauce stuck in the corners of his mouth while some of it fell down and, luckily, onto his plate.

"That's disgusting," Kurt said, shaking his head. "I didn't even know they could get that big!"

"That's what she said, right, Rach?"

Rachel shook herself out of her own mind, looking at Blaine blankly. "Right."

The four other teens shared a look and collectively frowned, Blaine and Finn finding a seat on the blanket and beginning to eat while Kurt and Mercedes filled them in on what they missed. People-watching was sort of the whole point of the festival for the teenagers aside from just getting out of the house, but Rachel couldn't help but search for only one person. It didn't seem possible to go almost an entire month without seeing someone who once had been a daily part of your life. Lima was a small town, but it was never bigger than when you felt so utterly alone.

"Rach?" Finn frowned, noticing her blank expression. "Did you eat?"

"I'm fine. Thank you." She ducked her head down, lifting her hand up to secure some hair back behind her ear before she lifted her gaze back up, her smile screwed into place. "Where's Quinn this evening?"

"Some family thing out on Lake Erie." He shrugged. "They do it every year."

Rachel nodded absently, not really having a follow-up question. Truthfully, she hadn't been all that interested in the answer to the first question. She knew things were strained between Quinn and Finn, and while before the idea might have excited her that maybe she'd have a chance with the great Finn Hudson, now the thought of them breaking up terrified her. It was like at prom when Finn had mentioned their relationship; her breath caught in her throat and all she wanted to do was change the subject.

Before, she thought that had been because she was with Puck. She was being faithful, trustworthy. Now, single, she wasn't sure why she felt so anxious about Finn and Quinn's relationship status. Maybe it was because she was still hurting. Or maybe it was because she wasn't over Puck yet and didn't want to confuse her friendship with Finn as something more. It was no secret that Finn didn't do alone too well, and frankly she wasn't handling it too favorably either. If Finn and Quinn broke up, Rachel knew he'd probably pursue her again in some degree and she didn't trust herself to make sound decisions when she felt so lost.

"It's nice to have a weekend off," Mercedes basked in the warmth of the setting sun, her hands stiff behind her as she lounged on the blanket.

"Before Mr. Schue runs us into the ground," Finn groaned, his dinner gone much to the amazement of everyone on the blanket. "I seriously can't handle practice every day for the month."

"It's only a few weeks," Kurt reminded with a scowl. "And you better get on board fast because I'm not dragging your ass out of bed _every_ day."

"It will be worth it," Blaine added less dramatically, letting Kurt take a sip from the soda he'd bought. "New York is going to be awesome."

"And we're going to blow the roof off nationals!" Mercedes chimed in, earning a round of loud approval from everyone, including Rachel. "Thanks, no doubt, to Rachel's wicked solo that I hear is amazing even though _someone_ is refusing to share it with _everyone_."

Rachel blushed at Mercedes' complete lack of subtlety, turning her eyes onto her female friend. "It's not done."

"Kurt says it's done."

"It's not … finished," she clarified.

"What does that mean?" Finn asked.

Kurt frowned at the way Rachel sunk into herself, deciding to come to her rescue. "It's like when you finish your dinner but want more. Rachel's done, but she's not finished."

Rachel smiled graciously at her friend, accepting his warm smile with a gentle nod before allowing the conversation to segue into less dangerous territory. They talked about glee and plans for the rest of the summer. They went over their class schedules for the upcoming year and gloated about being seniors and how much or little they were going to do for their last year at McKinley. They spoke of their dreams and their aspirations for the future. It was all completely carefree and refreshing, and not nearly as crass and useless as the conversation Puck was having almost one hundred yards away.

"Is it true you got fired from Sheets-n-Things for having sex on one of the display beds?"

"I heard you got fired for jerking off into the towels."

"Unlike you, fat ass, I don't have to date my right hand," Puck growled in response, lounging further back in his position on the bleachers. They had a great view of almost the entire festival from where they were, even if it was the second-to-last place he wanted to be. The last place was Burt's tire shop, where Puck had gotten a job at a few weeks ago and had been working at nearly every day, all day. He told everyone it was because he was good with his hands (insert sly grin and nudge here), but the truth was that his pool cleaning gig all but tanked thanks to him missing the first month of business. While it was true that not a lot of people in small town Ohio splurged for a pool, even less people splurged for a pool boy, _especially_ one who wasn't offering any happy endings.

"I should have known Puckerone would bounce back quickly from the midget freak!"

Puck nodded his head but moved his focus straight ahead, his mind instantly trying to distract itself. It was a common occurrence lately, so he had plenty of practice. Unfortunately, instead of thinking about Rachel, he thought about the people currently surrounding him, which wasn't much better. He used to be friends with these people. Or, at least he thought he was. They'd bust each other's balls about everything and talk shit about everyone and it didn't faze him in the least. They were like a brotherhood, and he thought he could rely on them if he ever needed a hand.

But, now, Puck looked around and he sort of hated himself. Hated who he was. These were his friends? He didn't even know Azimio's last name. Hell, he didn't even know the _first_ name of the weird kid who looked like he was trying to rock Puck's Mohawk but was failing miserably. And, considering what they've been saying for the past hour or whatever, they clearly didn't know him any better. So, how could they be his friends?

"Where's Britt?" He suddenly asked Santana, who was the one person in the group who might actually still fit in the friend category. He silently wondered whether she thought the same thing about the other people around them, wondered if she was happier now or at the glee pool party a few weeks ago. He shook his head, immediately getting rid of the thoughts that would no doubt follow that line of thinking. "Don't act like you don't know."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You guys were all over each other at the pool party."

"You mean the party where you and Rachel disappeared for 'food' and then suddenly both of you vanished without an explanation?"

Puck dropped his gaze off the Latina and back to the horizon, the sun almost completely set now. Everyone knew about the breakup, but no one except him and Rachel knew the details. Luckily for him, Rachel hadn't said anything to anyone, which meant his reputation was still intact. After a little more time, he was sure they could just pretend the whole thing never happened. That would definitely work in his favor, and it was probably exactly what she wanted, too. Then she wouldn't have to admit to having sex with him, good for her not just because it had sucked but because heaven forbid she looked corrupted in the eyes of the great Finn Hudson.

"Look," Santana started, feeling kind of bad that she'd pushed his mood from pissed to somber, "I'd hate for this to deflate your massive ego, but … I'm into girls." She shrugged, looking around them to make sure the jocks weren't listening before quickly adding, "Well, Brittany. We're … a couple now."

Puck blinked in shock, wondering when all of this happened. The two of them had seemed closer during the pool party, but Brittany was still with Artie at the time. He'd sort of been walking around in a fog lately, trying to pick himself back up after his giant waste of time with Rachel, but Artie was his boy. Puck had seen him during glee and a couple of times during the last three weeks and he'd never said anything about him and Brittany breaking up. Nor did Santana tell him anything and they'd seen each other almost the same amount.

"Why the fuck am I the last to know?"

Santana knitted her eyebrows together, crossing her arms over her chest even as a small smile spread over her face. "Why do you care?"

Puck opened his mouth, then shut it, thinking his initial response sounded too girly. Sounded too much like Rachel. "Two hot chicks are dating. That's information I need to know."

Santana rolled her eyes. "It's not like that. We're exclusive." She smoothed the hair on her head, her long nails catching on the elastic band of her ponytail. "It's not always easy, but … it's real. You know?" She sighed, unsure why she was going into so much detail with a person who normally didn't say more than five words in response to anything. But, knowing what he'd been through and knowing where he was now, she figured maybe he'd understand more than anyone else. "It's like what happened with the Cheerios. Eventually you just wonder why you're even bothering to deny it anymore."

Puck tried to tune her out, but he couldn't. He couldn't ignore her voice and the thoughts of Rachel swirling in his head at the same time. He had to pick, and he never would have thought picking Santana would have been the wrong choice. But everything she was saying hit too close to home. Her and Brittany were exactly where he and Rachel had been a few months ago. They were just starting out and they were braving all the obstacles of being a real couple. Santana was giving up her reputation and choosing Brittany.

"We won't be in high school forever, you know?" Santana finally stated, shrugging again as she went back to lounging against the bleacher. "Then what?"

Puck squared his jaw, again focusing straight out in front of him after officially tuning her out. If he didn't, then he'd have to think about how she was doing exactly what he wasn't brave enough to do. Or, rather, what he wasn't _stupid_ enough to do. Unfortunately, ignoring her left him open to focus on other things, most notably the tiny brunette that caught his eye from so far away that he shouldn't have been able to recognize her but could.

She looked beautiful if not completely annoying, wearing a dress that looked smoking hot on her while sitting next to Finn. _Finn_, who was sans Quinn and leaning into Rachel's personal space, making her laugh at something that was no doubt idiotic. The whole thing paired with Santana's gay lesson in maturity had him seething, and he found himself retreating from the group in no real direction. He just needed something to distract him from _everything_, and when he saw a new Cheerio walk past him with come hither eyes he figured it was as good of a distraction as any.

It didn't take long before they were wedged between two food vendors, Puck's hands on either side of the girl while their mouths were all but suctioned together. Things were getting pretty hot and heavy and it was getting close to the time where Puck used to say something to seal the deal - before all the going slow bullshit that fucked with his junk. But the girl was panting like a dog and calling him 'Puck' and it just wasn't working for him. She felt wrong in his arms and it could have been one of the vendors, but she didn't smell right, either. When he pulled away to try something else, though, his eyes caught the silhouette of Rachel in his periphery.

Rachel watched Puck dislodge himself from the girl, her mouth falling open as her heart fell further and further into her stomach. She felt tears sting her eyes and almost choked out a sob when he had the nerve to grin in her direction. She watched his arm reach up to lie across the shoulders of the small blonde, Rachel busying herself with the money in her hand as she listened to Puck tell the girl he'd meet her back at the bleachers.

"I didn't know you were here," Rachel said slowly, thinking a simple hello between them wasn't enough. She'd gone almost a month without seeing him or hearing from him, and now he was right across from her and she couldn't think of anything to say. She just wanted to soak in his appearance, even if it was still pretty ragged. Truth be told, she took some satisfaction in that. Like _maybe_ he wasn't taking their breakup as well as he was letting on. _Maybe_ he was hurting just as much as she was. "Who's … um, who's your friend?"

"She's a little more than a friend," Puck leered, killing two birds with one stone. He didn't actually know the chick's name – Mindy? Mandy? Kate? – but he also didn't want Rachel to think he was just acting out. He wanted to hurt her. Things would just be easier if she hated him. Then she'd be like everyone else, and he wouldn't care so much. "I wonder if she can sing. We'll need another chick for nationals since you bailed."

"I didn't bail." Her voice was breathless and she hated it. She hated that even a _word_ could remind her of him, of what they had. "I've been in the choir room working on my solo while you guys have been in the auditorium."

Puck's mouth twitched, his lips wanting to curve down into a frown but his brain refusing to let him show any remorse. He didn't want her to know that he cared that she hadn't been at glee. That he hadn't seen her in almost a month and it was seriously eating him alive. That all he wanted to do was ask her how everything was and talk to her about working at Burt's shop and things happening at home. He didn't want her to know because he didn't want it to be true. He didn't want to care anymore. He just wanted to forget.

"Oh yea. I heard that," he lied instead, inhaling a deep breath since he suddenly felt winded. "Shit any good?"

Rachel shrugged sadly, thinking of the words she'd written in response to their breakup. Words that she had put onto paper and had sung time and time again but still couldn't finish without a million memories flashing through her mind and choking her on the spot. She never wanted to perform it in the first place, but Kurt had found the song in her notebook and the rest, as they say, was history. Now she had less than three weeks to get past whatever it was in the song that always seemed to consume her, otherwise she'd break down on stage in front of everyone at nationals and not just embarrass herself, but ruin everything the club had worked for all year.

"Mr. Schuester seems to think so. We're leading with it." Puck bobbed his head, letting his gaze fall to the ground while both his hands stuffed into his pockets. "Well, I better get my drink and get back before Kurt calls the National Guard."

"Yea. Whatever. I was leavin' anyway."

"What about your friend?"

Puck shut his eyes tight, knowing he'd been caught, and then slowly opened them back up. He was surprised to see that she was staring at him, and all he could do was look back. It was awkward, but it oddly cleared his head for the minute or so that it lasted until he had to eventually turn and walk away. He'd left Mindy or Mandy or whoever the Hell it was waiting at the bleachers along with all his other so-called friends, just walking home right from the festival. And the whole time, all he could think of was what Santana had said.

Why was he bothering to deny it still?


	18. Fair Practice

**Author's Note:** I know you guys are hoping I'll just shove Puck and Rachel back together and spend the next three chapters with them all happy and in love and what not, but unfortunately it's not that easy. My goal for this story was to take the show from a certain point and alter it bit by bit, and while I agree that things are much nicer when they are together, it would be completely out of character for _either _of them to give in so quickly. So, the angst must go on.

However, that does not mean I don't hear you guys nor does it mean I have any intention of letting you down. I'm a super sap and have big plans for this story even as it is winding down. The last two chapters are kicking my butt as I try to keep everything in character but pack all the missing pieces into them, which is why I MIGHT be doing an epilogue. *sigh* But that is neither here nor there. What IS important is saying a GIANT thank you to everyone reading and ESPECIALLY those reviewing. The attention on this story is mind-boggling and I cannot express how much that means to me. The fact that I will likely reach beyond 200 reviews is cause for concern, as I don't even think I'm all that good (which is precisely why I demand you guys every chapter to let me know what you think).

Before we get this show on the road, I want to add a tiny disclaimer here that says the bit of the song used is from Akon's "Right Now (Na Na)" and it most definitely not mine. It might give a tiny clue into what is to come for nationals (in my fictional world, not for the actual show), but likely won't be enough by itself. Regardless, point is don't sue me. Thanks.

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><p>Puck yanked open the door to McKinley High School, his hand immediately stuffing back into the pocket of his cargo shorts like the other as he walked through the deserted hallways. If he had known nationals were in July, he wouldn't have tried so hard to get there. It was going to be cool to go to New York, but coming to this place in the summer was seriously starting to piss him off. He was working his ass off during a time that was supposed to be entirely carefree. Now between glee rehearsals and his work schedule at the garage, Puck was just lucky if he found time to eat <em>and<em> sleep.

"Mr. Schue wants us to meet in the choir room."

Puck turned at the sound of the blonde's familiar voice, his scowl still in place even as he nodded in understanding. She sped up to walk in step with him, and he could see in the corner of his eye that she was thinking about saying something. What, he wasn't sure, but Quinn and he had one of those relationships that bordered on being friendly. If it were something important, she'd actually consider his feelings or at least his possible reaction instead of just saying the blunt truth like she normally did. It was actually the exact opposite of the tactic he used to get her to talk, as Quinn responded better to abrasiveness than sugar-coating problems. She was a fighter, not a lover.

"Spit it out, mama."

"I thought we talked about that," she reminded in that pitch-perfect annoyance that always seemed to accompany their conversations. He managed a smirk as he shrugged, walking into the choir room instead of the auditorium they'd been rehearsing in all week. He looked around blankly, wondering where everyone was before eyeing Quinn. "I'm running interference."

"What for?"

"Rachel." She watched his reaction to just hearing her name, and frowned at the complete lack of emotional response. Not that he didn't have one, but it always surprised her how good he was at hiding his feelings. "Mr. Schue asked her to try to perform the solo for everyone."

"And that doesn't include me anymore?" Puck asked harshly. If he ever thought he was going to be picked second over Rachel Berry, people would have checked his brain for tumors. He was at the top of the totem pole and she was at the bottom. But, in glee, it was like _everyone_ was rallying around her and he was sick of it. Everyone was just kissing her ass because they needed her for nationals, but now it was personal. "I don't need this shit."

"She can't do it, Puck." Quinn's voice was forceful enough that it somehow stopped his retreat, his body slowly turning away from the door and back toward her. "Kurt's heard it. Mercedes, too. Finn said she was able to sing it for him, but … she can't do it in front of everyone."

If she was trying to make him feel bad, mentioning that Finn had heard the solo when he hadn't wasn't the best idea. "And I should care because …?"

"Because you love her."

Puck immediately tensed, his spine rigid and his gaze hard. His hand gripped the edge of the black piano, his body desperate to release the pent up energy. Ever since he ran into Rachel at the Fourth of July festival, he'd given up trying to forget their relationship. Now he was just struggling to get over it.

"So we lose nationals. Big deal."

"This has nothing to do with nationals and you know it." Quinn frowned. "What happened between you two?"

"None of your business," he growled, pushing away from the piano just to keep from staying in one spot. "If you can't keep Finn away from her that ain't my problem."

"This isn't about Finn." Quinn shook her head, crossing her arms in front of her chest. "It isn't about Rachel or even me. This is about you." Her arms flailed out angrily. "Where is the guy who sang that duet with her in this very room? What happened to him?"

Puck closed his eyes tight, keeping the instant flash of memories out of the forefront of his mind. "He wasn't real."

"And this is?" She gestured to him like he was a piece of trash, and frankly he wasn't going to deny it. "This is the _real_ Puck?"

His breath was uneven, his eyes still closed as his stomach lurched with a wave of nausea. His insides were in knots and it didn't matter what he did lately it never seemed to get better. Puck just couldn't shake the feeling of disappointment coursing through him, and the constant mental snapshots and sound bites of his and Rachel's relationship just made it worse. It was quiet in the room, but hearing Rachel's sweet voice explain the difference between Puck and Noah was deafening even in memory.

"What you see is what you get," he choked out, finally opening his eyes. Another wave of sickness filtered through him at the look she returned back to him, as she didn't have to say anything for him to know what she was thinking. It was eerily similar to how Rachel had looked at him the night they broke up. Like she refused to believe she had misjudged him. "I never said I deserved her."

"No," Quinn answered sadly, not really surprised that he knew what she was thinking. Like it or not, they had a bond between them that could never be broken, no matter how hard they tried. "You didn't."

"Didn't what?" Finn asked innocently, strolling into the choir room with a confused but happy smile. He looked at Quinn and then Puck and then back again, the smile faltering somewhere in the middle. "Everything cool?"

"It's fine. Let's go practice."

Puck walked out of the choir room and toward the auditorium, ignoring Quinn and Finn's hushed whispers behind him. He could hear the strain in their voices, though, and he knew that things between them were just going from bad to worse. He hadn't heard Rachel's solo, but he wasn't dumb enough to think it could bridge the giant gap between her and Quinn's possibility of a friendship. Her motivation for attacking him was definitely caused by Finn slipping through her fingers, no doubt being lured back to his brunette ex-girlfriend. And likely in a melodic way.

"OK, we're all here!" Mr. Schuester announced when Finn, Quinn, and Puck came walking into the auditorium. Rachel instinctively stepped away from the microphone, excusing herself to get her bottled water from the choir room. She knew Mr. Schue was just going to go over the new plan for their routine, and she didn't need to be there for that since she'd helped develop it. They had gotten rid of one of the songs they were going to do last week, and now the entire thing was much more concise. It told a beautiful story of lost love, finding love again, and then, sadly, losing it once more. On paper it didn't quite make sense, the group pairing some modern hip hop songs with some old school light rock, but the arrangements were amazing and Rachel was actually quite pleased with how everything was turning out.

In true New Directions fashion, they were leading with a power duet with her and Finn, with plans to come in from the back of the theater if they could pull it off. They still weren't sure of the scope of the venue, but they had a backup plan just in case. From there they had a group number that was led by Artie on vocals and everyone else doing some difficult (and slightly suggestive) choreography. After that the boys would take over, Puck, Kurt, Blaine, and Sam all showcased on vocals, and then the girls were taking on their own song, predominantly led by Santana and Mercedes. Then, just when the crowd was amply jazzed, Rachel would come out and belt her original solo.

It was a perfect plan that really showed how diverse the group was and showed a lot of thoughtfulness and continuity. Rachel honestly didn't think anyone would be able to beat them, certainly not Vocal Adrenaline. Maybe they weren't as big as some of the other groups that they'd no doubt come across, but they had more heart than all of them. They put more work into this performance than anyone else, and that kind of drive and determination was _not_ going to go unnoticed. She just _knew_ it.

Unfortunately, she also knew the whole thing was dependent on her actually being able to finish her song. She'd made a lot of progress, performing it for those she felt closest to and at least finishing the whole thing now. But her voice still cracked at certain parts or didn't come out at all at some points. Everyone was being really supportive considering, but Rachel knew she had just a week left before it was do or die. Sink or swim.

"Alright, guys. Starting today and for the next few days before we leave, I'd really like for us to just do dry runs of the routine. There's a lot of choreography and a lot of switching and pausing and I think if we want to perfect the timing then we're going to have to practice the transitions just as much as the singing." Everyone nodded in agreement, which might have been a first for the group. "We'll skip the duet at the beginning and Rachel's solo at the end and really just hone in on those three songs in the middle. So why doesn't everyone take their places as if Finn and Rachel were just finishing up their song."

Rachel placed her water bottle on one of the auditorium chairs and climbed the stairs to the left of the stage. She stood in the center of the stage with Finn, singing the last bar of the song as instructed by Mr. Schuester before the music for the group number started. The two teens swiftly moved to their positions on stage, everyone else coming out from backstage and into their rightful spots as the beginning notes played out. Artie came out across the curtain last, rolling toward the middle as he sung the first verse. As soon as the music picked up from its original somber tune, the entire group joined in with the chorus as well as the beginnings of the intricate dance steps.

_I wanna make up right now, na na_

_I wanna make up right now, na na_

_Wish we never broke up right now, na na_

_I need to link up right now, na na_

_I wanna make up right now, na na_

_I wanna make up right now, na na_

_Wish we never broke up right now, na na_

_I need to link up right now, na na_

Puck was on autopilot during the entire performance. He was so used to the lyrics that it didn't even faze him to find them ironic, even when the dance steps brought Rachel right in front of him. _Grinding_ against him. Mr. Schuester seemed to be the only one who didn't care that Puck and Rachel had called it quits, clearly when he designed choreography that had Rachel pressing her hot, perfect ass into his crotch for a third of the song. For the other third she was all over Finn, and the other third Sam. Seriously, Mr. Schue was a legit prick.

Rachel scampered off the stage with the rest of the girls as the song faded out and into the all-male number. This was when the girls would switch shirts backstage, but right then the group just had a few extra minutes to catch their breath. No one felt more winded than Rachel, though, the dance moves where she was in such close proximity to Puck making her breathless for a completely different reason than why everyone else was already exhausted. But, even as she felt light headed from a severe lack of oxygen, she found herself holding her breath listening to Puck's voice during his part of the song.

It had been about ten days since they ran into each other at the Fourth of July festival, and while she'd seen him more because of glee practicing every day, they still didn't talk much. When they weren't rehearsing, she'd kept herself busy with helping Mr. Schuester with direction or voice tips or she'd simply chatted with Mercedes or Kurt. Puck usually kept to himself or claimed to need a breather, sometimes talking with Artie or even Santana.

It made no sense to her given how horribly he'd broken her heart, but all the shattered pieces magically came together and leapt into her throat whenever she heard his voice. She _missed_ him. She missed the way they'd waste hours talking about nothing; she even missed the fighting. He used to always complain that she talked too much, but he was also the one person who always wanted to hear what she had to say. Like her opinion mattered. Like _she _mattered.

"Rachel!" Mercedes hissed, the girls all ready to slide into their places on stage as the boys' number dulled and the repetitive sound of the saxophone on their song started. She shuffled into place seamlessly, the boys sharing a few dance steps with them before exiting about the exact time Santana started in on the first verse. The dancing for their number was a bit out of Rachel's comfort zone, and it reminded her of the _Love Sex and Magic_ number so much sometimes that she'd catch herself trying to find Puck's gaze from the side. But he was never there.

"That's was actually pretty good, guys!" Mr. Schuester clapped his hands together from his vantage point in the middle of the auditorium, smiling wickedly as he brought his lips very close to the microphone. "Let's do it again."

Puck groaned along with everyone else, though for likely completely different reasons. The redundancy would no doubt get tiresome quick, but he was more concerned with how much longer he could take watching Rachel's hot body strutting around on stage and not being able to do anything about it. He'd barely made it through the group number and, after watching her dance suggestively with the rest of the girls, he really wasn't in the mood to repeat the torture all over again. But he also wasn't a bitch, so he followed everyone, starting back up at his original position and again trying not to focus on the way Finn's eyes bored into Rachel's as they sang the last verse of their duet. He'd heard them practice it dozens of times over the last ten days and even though he knew it was an emotional song, Puck really didn't think they needed to _over_sell it. At least not at practice. And not right before Rachel switched gears to slutty dancer girl again. Seriously, why did Mr. Schuester hate him? Pick a leading man and stick to it.

But don't pick Finn.

Or him.

Rachel could dance with Kurt. Or Blaine. Or someone else who wouldn't care that the curve of her ass fit perfectly against the front of his crotch. Puck squeezed his eyes shut, cursing under his breath and ignoring the graceful way she sauntered away from him over to Finn. She'd just done the exact same thing to him, and Brittany was doing the same thing on him, too, but watching Rachel dance with Finn suddenly pissed him off. Logically he knew she was just giving it her all because she was Rachel Berry and anything less than 200% just wasn't possible, but fuck logistics. Finn was practically salivating as she grinded against him and Puck had kept his mouth shut for the past ten days.

"This is bullshit!" Rachel flinched at Puck's booming voice, startled away from Finn as everyone stopped dancing and the music stopped, too. "We're not going to win nationals with Finn having a boner the whole time!"

"I do not!" The tall teen's cheeks flushed red, his eyes quickly moving to Quinn's before addressing Puck again. "We're just dancing."

"Well stop undressing her with your eyes! You have your own girlfriend."

"And you _don't_," Finn bit back, the two boys getting closer and closer as their tempers flared. "You broke up with her. She isn't yours anymore!"

"She ain't yours either, Finnessa!"

"Both of you stop it!" Rachel shouted as she came to stand between them, both boys snapping their necks as they regarded her. Her hands were on her hips and her jaw was set as hard as her eyes. Without warning, she grabbed each of them by their wrists, dragging them out of the auditorium and all the way to the choir room. Puck yanked his arm out of her grip, finally letting out the breath he had held the entire time her skin had been on his. She frowned at his behavior, slowly moving her attention to Finn when Puck moved all the way to the other side of the room.

"I know everyone's stressed out because we've been working so hard, but we can't let our personal differences get in the way of our performance."

"I ain't."

"Me neither!" Finn defended quickly.

Rachel sighed, seeing she wasn't going to get anywhere with both boys. "Finn, why don't you go talk to the rest of the club? As co-captain, it's your responsibility to make sure everyone's best interests are kept in mind and I think …"

"Yea. I'll go smooth things over."

Rachel nodded, smiling shyly at the way he shortened her thought down to one, short sentence. She watched him leave out of the right door, eventually turning all the way to the left and focusing on Puck. He was reclined back in one of the plastic chairs, two of the legs up and his hands resting together on top of his head. His eyes were closed and he looked completely relaxed if she didn't know him any better. Unfortunately, she did – despite what he thought.

"Care to explain your outburst, Noah?"

"You two fuckin' or what?" He blurted out, his gaze not faltering when he finally opened his eyes back up. And even though she was obviously shocked by his question, he was happy to see that her gaze didn't waver either. Well, not happy. Because he didn't care. Whatever.

"Finn and I are just friends," she responded slowly, biting the inside of her lip as she approached him.

She settled for the seat next to him, closing her eyes and just relishing in the wave of memories she got from being here with him like this. In the quiet she could pretend that it was still the end of the school year; they were in the choir room waiting for everyone else to show up, getting ready to talk about their plans for the weekend or fighting about being late for the last class because they were making out by his locker.

"I told him what you told me that Quinn said earlier in the year." She shrugged sadly, forcing herself back to reality instead of the fantasy world she let herself drift to briefly. "I thought he deserved to know the type of future that Quinn saw; Finn doesn't want to be stuck in this town anymore than you or me, and I don't think he should date someone who doesn't believe he can be better than he is. He deserves to be with someone who won't let him settle for good enough."

"Someone like you?" Puck asked bitterly, his gaze falling to his lap as the chair fell down to all four legs.

"No." Rachel shook her head, willing her tears to remain at bay as she stood. She kept her body angled toward him, even though Puck kept his gaze down. "That wouldn't be fair to Finn."

Puck lifted his eyes to hers, searching her deep brown eyes. The urge to kiss her had never been greater, and that was saying something. He licked his lips and swallowed hard, his eyes closing when he remembered all the other times he hadn't resisted that urge. He was about four seconds away from a full blown heart attack (or needing to excuse himself to take care of things in the bathroom) when she finally spoke again and then left to head back to rehearsal.

"I couldn't go back to Finn when I'm still in love with you."


	19. Friends with Penquins

**Author's Note:** Words cannot express how amazed I am at the reception on this story. Seriously, I'm in awe of all of you guys and cannot thank you enough. I've been trying to reply to reviews individually because everyone deserves it for their dedication and encouragement, but the site has been a little temperamental. So, if you didn't get a reply from me know that it's nothing personal and hopefully the flaw is counteracted so I can continue to grovel at your feet.

I can't believe we are already to the chapter before the last chapter, but here we are. There's a few more hints into Rachel's solo, but the big reveal won't be until next update. Please enjoy and please, please, please let me know what you think. Thanks!

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><p>Rachel bounced excitedly in her seat, her eyes focused outside the window. The bus had just passed Times Square and she honestly didn't know if she was going to be able to contain her excitement much longer. The glee club had arrived in New York two days ago, and Rachel still hadn't gotten over her initial adrenaline rush. The energy in the city was palpable, and she could feel her entire body absorbing it. Never did her dreams and future feel more tangible than they did now that she'd actually been where she so desperately desired to be.<p>

"Oh. Em. Gee!" Kurt squealed, lifting from his seat on the right side of the bus to his knees. His eyes didn't move from the window for a good minute, the side of his face pressed against the glass until the last possible second. "That was Bryant Park. I think I just died and went to heaven. _Fashion_ heaven."

Rachel giggled at Kurt, looking away from him to again focus outside her own window. The cacophony of gasps and sighs became commonplace as they passed landmarks like Saks Fifth, Pulitzer Fountain, and FAO Schwartz. She even heard Artie geek out about the Nintendo World Store even though it was wedged somewhere in the middle of a street they weren't even driving on. Then again, Rockefeller Center was probably equidistant and almost everyone (including herself) couldn't help but buzz about that.

"The bus is going to drop us off on the curb of the next street," Mr. Schuester announced from the front of the bus, kneeling on his seat with a piece of paper gripped firmly in his hands. "We've all agreed that you are old enough to explore the park without the chaperones holding your hands, but there are some rules, guys!"

Everyone groaned at the teacher's stern voice, though it was mostly because they'd been through all of it before. The speech about the hotel rooms was actually quite humorous, Mr. Schuester's efforts to keep a buffer between the boys and the girls comical. Rachel had half a mind to wonder if the poor guy was even enjoying himself during these free moments of their trip, as he'd looked split seconds away from having a stroke yesterday at the Statue of Liberty. Then again that might have had everything to do with Sam telling Mr. Schuester that someone had stolen Artie's wheelchair and then Puck saying that Brittany still felt kind of bad about their breakup so she was going to try to earn money for another one by standing on a street corner.

"I know you kids are too cool for watches these days, but does _everyone _have a clock of some kind?" He waited to hear a majority of grunts in the affirmative. "OK. Good. We will meet back at the _same_ place the bus drops us off at in four hours. That's three o'clock. Did everyone hear that? _Three in the afternoon!_" Mr. Schuester was officially shouting. "This is _extremely_ important, guys, as we need to have enough time to load back up and get back to the hotel so we can all get dressed and ready for the theater."

Rachel started bouncing in her seat again, anxious beyond belief about going to an actual Broadway play later this evening. She'd enjoyed the other tourist attractions so far, but nothing compared with being in New York and seeing a live Broadway show. It would be like a sneak preview of the life she was going to have; like she could close her eyes and pretend it was five years from now. She was on stage and all the applause was for her.

"Lastly, even though the chaperones won't necessarily be with you that doesn't mean you should be careless. And, in an effort to ensure your safety, we've decided to implement the buddy system." Mr. Schuester rocked slightly when the bus shifted from drive to park. "Please pick a partner quickly and meet me outside the bus to get your tickets for the zoo and then you are free to go."

Rachel looked directly to her right and saw Mercedes nodding her head at Lauren. She leaned forward in time to see Kurt and Blaine seal the deal with a chaste kiss, and she could hear Artie and Sam already talking about how epic their four hours were going to be. Brittany and Santana did that stupid pinkie shake they did, and Quinn and Finn each gave the other an appreciative, warm grin that was similar to the one Mike and Tina shared except it lacked the cute kiss that followed the Asians' silent agreement. Slowly, Rachel turned all the way to the back, her eyes lifting over her seat and catching Puck's through all the other heads.

Puck threw the tiny brunette a smirk, waiting until she turned back around before dropping his head back against his seat with a soft thud. His eyes were focused on the ceiling, but he was really addressing the big man upstairs, wondering what the Hell he did to have such awful luck. Rachel was the one person on the bus who Puck was trying to avoid, and now he had four unsupervised hours with her. Four unsupervised hours that would be absolute torture simply because every time he was alone with her he couldn't stop thinking about what she'd said at glee rehearsal at the beginning of the week.

She was still in love with him.

He wasn't sure why it bothered him so much, why he couldn't let it go. Maybe it was because he'd never been in a real relationship before, but the two close to it had ended any way but amicably. Quinn pretty much hated his living, breathing guts for almost a year, and Santana … well she was never too keen about being replaced. And those two had really been mutual breakups. Puck didn't take the boyfriend label too well, and Quinn and Santana both got tired of trying to change that fact. His breakup with Rachel, though, had been ugly. It had been heartbreaking and completely filled with drama, and if anyone deserved to hate him, it was Rachel.

But she didn't. Dammit, she refused, not just being civil to him but still liking him. Still _loving _him, apparently. Seriously, what did a guy have to do to get rid of that girl? How could he get it through her thick skull that he was _not_ what she needed, that she could do so much better? _Deserved_ so much better? He was running out of ideas, not to mention will. There was still the part of him who had wised up and knew he had to push her away to make everything right again, but there was the other part of him still clinging to how comfortable it was having her in his life. How _right_ everything had felt then, too.

"Looks like you're stuck with me, Berry," he responded coolly once he walked up to her seat. She responded with a sad smile that sort of killed him, and he let her walk out of the bus ahead of him just so she couldn't see the way his lips curved down into a frown. Mr. Schuester was standing outside the bus next to Ms. Pillsbury and Coach Bieste, giving the lecture about safety and responsibility again while handing out their prepaid tickets. Everyone knew better than to argue or ask questions, swiftly grabbing their tickets and then splitting up accordingly - leaving the Rachel and Puck alone together.

"What shall we do first?" Rachel asked brightly, standing in line at the zoo entrance. She could see Finn and Quinn up ahead, but everyone else seemed to go in opposite directions. Clearly some people were more excited about exploring the park than visiting the zoo. She wondered briefly if Puck was one of those people, and then she remembered that he once told her that he actually thought zoos were pretty cool. He'd been probably ten at the time, but even that memory sort of made her smile in that depressed, aching way she'd grown accustomed to since they broke up.

"I don't care." He showed his ticket to the lady and stepped through the rotating bars. "But we're stoppin' at the first food vendor. I'm starvin'."

Rachel agreed since she was getting rather hungry herself, their breakfast at the hotel at seven in the morning seeming a lot longer ago than the four or so hours it was. Luckily she had packed homemade granola bars in her bag to not only save money but avoid all the hardships that often came with her restricted diet. Unfortunately, the second they were in line for some food and she'd grabbed the tiny foil package from her strapped backpack, Puck plucked it right from her grip.

"The Hell's this?"

"Mine," she answered quickly, taking it back from him. "It's a granola bar."

"You can't live off that shit, ya know?" He rolled his eyes, digging into his pocket for his wallet. "Lemme buy you somethin'."

"I'm fine, Noah. Thank you."

"Come on, Berry." He waved a ten dollar bill in front of her teasingly. For a moment, it felt like the beginning of the new year, back when they were relearning how to not kill each other in the middle of any given conversation. "From one friend to another."

"I thought you said we weren't friends?"

"When did I say that?" He questioned in a bit of a higher register than he was comfortable with.

"Last year." Rachel kept her gaze down, matching the volume of her voice. "On the bleachers."

Puck swallowed thickly, his mouth opening slightly to account for his suddenly ragged breathing. She had to bring that up? Here? Less than twenty minutes into their unsupervised four hours? Maybe she didn't hate him, but she was certainly going to be the death of him. And that was clearly her goal, otherwise she wouldn't have gone straight for the jugular like that.

"That was before," he finally admitted, allowing his gaze to run over her frame before finally settling back on her eyes. They were so big and hopeful and he was again reminded of how much easier everything would be if she would just hate him. Why couldn't she get over the stupid notion that he was worth it?

"And now we're …" she bit her lip, wanting to look down but not letting herself, "something else entirely?"

Puck inhaled a sharp breath, his eyes closing on their own accord even as they approached the front of the line. There were people behind him telling him to go, and the vendor himself asking over and over again what Puck wanted, but he could barely hear any of them. All he could hear was the blood rushing by his ears while Rachel's words echoed in his mind.

Something else entirely.

That was exactly what they were, what they had been. And no matter how hard he'd tried to deny it in the past five weeks or so, he couldn't anymore. Those two parts of him would always be there, fighting with each other. The best he could do was pick which one to follow and stick with it; there was no going back. He wanted to think he could just end it and return to how things had been before, but he couldn't. He'd changed too much, and not necessarily negatively. He gave so much grief about people not taking his efforts to be a better person seriously, and now that they were, he'd punished the one person who had made it all possible.

"I'm sorry," he said, but quickly covered it up by looking at the food vendor and ordering a hot dog. When he turned his attention back to her, he was surprised to see her still watching him, waiting. "We can't be friends, Rachel."

Her tongue clicked against the roof of her mouth when her mouth opened, Puck's eyes moving to the vendor scornfully. He grabbed the wrapped up hot dog and moved to sit at one of the nearby tables, Rachel following with her mouth still agape. He shoved a large bite into his mouth and used the extra minute or so of chewing to think of his next words, as clearly blurting out the first thing that came to his mind hadn't worked. Did it ever?

"We're cool and shit, but … we can't be friends," he said on a shrug, realizing maybe it didn't sound pretty but it didn't make it any less true.

"Why not?" She asked in a voice that was so small and so fragile that he wanted to punch _himself_ in the face. That was a new one.

"You expect too much."

It was so clear and so concise that Rachel had trouble processing the sentence. She couldn't deny the validity in the statement, but the connotations that it held were too much. Did he mean in life? From him? _Of_ him? She had dreams, big ones, she knew. But never once had she put any type of pressure on him to live out her fantasies. She'd learned her lesson with Finn, and knew from herself that you couldn't change people. You couldn't force people to be someone they weren't, which is why her and Noah meshed so wonderfully because they had accepted the other's faults and loved each other in spite or maybe even because of them.

At least that's what she'd thought.

"I never would have thought our first time as a couple would have been better. Easier," she finally lamented, rewrapping her granola bar and placing it back in her bag. She watched him take another bite of his hot dog as she stood. "I've always heard it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all, but …" she shrugged sadly, moving away from the table, "I'm not so sure."

"Where are you going?" He asked desperately, swallowing a large bite almost entirely without chewing. "We're supposed to stay together."

"Yeah," she answered blankly, shrugging again. "That's what I thought, too."

Puck groaned at her words, watching her turn and walk down the left pathway. Why did she have to make everything so damn difficult? He was half tempted to just let her wander around aimlessly for the next three-plus hours, but Mr. Schuester would have his nuts on a platter if he showed back up at the bus sans Rachel. Plus, fuck his life, he didn't like the idea of her walking around New York by herself, even if Central Park during the day was about as intimidating as a basket full of new kittens.

He shoved the rest of his hot dog in his mouth and begrudgingly stood up, taking the same steps Rachel had toward the left pathway. The sign said it led toward the reptile center, the aviary, and the polar circle. On a whim he picked the polar circle, thinking that at least if he didn't find her then he'd get to walk around in the air conditioning looking for her stupid ass. It was sunny and somewhere in the mid-80s and even going commando didn't let in enough of a draft that Puck wasn't swimming in balls soup.

He paid little mind to the exhibits as he passed, the large crowd by the polar bears only helping him weed out the tiny brunette sitting on a bench in the far right corner of the space. Her head was up and he could almost picture the determined look on her face. But, when he approached, noting the penguin display while looking at her through the corner of his eye, he was surprised to see a tear falling down her cheek. And he was surprised not just because he had been wrong, but surprised because he just then realized just how wrong he was … about everything.

"Did you know that certain species of penguins mate for life?" She questioned absently, distracting him and herself at the same time. "Of about 5,000 species of mammals, only three to five percent are actually monogamous."

"How do the dude penguins know which one is their girl?" He asked with one eyebrow raised, surveying the lot of animals and trying to see if there was anything particularly unique about each penguin. They all had the same body type, same outfit (so to speak), same eye color from what he could tell. Shit would be like dating a chick who had a hundred identical sisters and never knowing if you were banging the right one or not.

"The male can hear it in her voice." Rachel sniffled, shuffling to her right in order to give him enough space where he could sit down if he wanted. He didn't, still focused too much on the animal display in front of them to be able to process everything Rachel was saying _and_ to send the signal to his legs to bend down enough to sit. He was lost somewhere in the middle of thinking about whether he believed monogamy was possible and thinking back to the Fourth of July fiasco with the Cheerio he'd left behind. She didn't feel or smell or taste right, and if he thought about it, she didn't _sound_ right, either. Was Rachel his _penguin_?

He exhaled a shaky breath, sinking into the seat next to her.

"Before, everything used to be so clear," she spoke gravelly, taking the sudden tension in his posture as indication that she'd only have his attention for another minute or so. That was plenty long enough, though, as she figured he'd bolt after she finished her thought. But she didn't care anymore. It didn't matter if she scared him away anymore because he was already gone. "I thought we'd graduate from high school and then I'd go to Julliard while you studied social work at NYU."

Puck turned his head to fully regard her, shock in his expression. "You … you really thought I'd make it here?"

Rachel turned her head, too, inhaling sharply at how close they were. It was dark in the area but he was close enough that she could see the color of his eyes, and she made note to memorize it for when he wasn't so near. Deep down, she knew from then on it would always be her real favorite color. "It's not in the past tense, Noah. You will make it." She cleared her throat. "But, maybe not here, per say. I can picture you in California just as easily. Beautiful weather, girls perpetually in bikinis," she bit her lip, adding sadly, "nearly three-thousand miles away from where I'd be."

Puck frowned, his gaze falling to his lap. He rested his elbows on his knees and used his hands to cover his face, eventually letting them run up through his hair and back. He was so frustrated, and he hadn't yet decided if it was mostly at her or himself. He wanted to yell at her, tell her the Rachel Berry he knew would never have uttered those words. She was perfect and she was the first person to tell you so. But he couldn't say any of that because he had been the one who made her doubt herself. _He_ was the reason she had been crying in the middle of her favorite city in the entire world.

"How can you say all that?" Puck finally asked, shame in his voice. "After what I did …"

"You making it or not has nothing to do with me, Noah." Rachel shrugged, letting his open-ended remorse roll down her back in a mild attempt to keep him from running – and her from crying anymore than she already had. "That's one thing that neither you nor Finn seems to understand."

She shook her head sadly, the lyrics from the song she'd written splintering through her brain. She liked to think she had all the answers and always got it right, but despite her best intentions she often made a mess of things. And it didn't matter how many times she tried, she couldn't fix it. She had to suck it up and move on, just like he had done, because no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't go back and change it. She just had to hope she could learn from everything and get through the pain.

"You don't need me."

Puck finally turned back to face her, forced to look at the side of her face as her gaze was now focused back on the penguins. He swallowed thickly and licked his suddenly dry lips, thinking of certain words to say but knowing they wouldn't come out even if he tried. It had taken five months and one Earth-shattering but world-ending sexual encounter before he told this girl he loved her. No matter how badly he wanted to make her feel better, especially by telling her the truth she deserved to hear, he knew one conversation wasn't going to be enough for him to admit that he didn't just need her, he wanted her. _Still_.

And that was the real reason they couldn't be friends.


	20. Getting it Right

**Author's Note:** So here it is. The end. ... Maybe. I want your guys' honest opinion; I have an idea for an epilogue, but if you think this end is just so perfect and shouldn't be ruined, then we can leave it here. I haven't started writing it yet, so there would be no time/effort wasted. The decision is yours.

And, you know, while you're telling me THAT decision, you can tell me in general what you thought about this chapter. I know it is selfish (even though you guys know you rock my world and I can't thank you enough), but I'd love to hear what you think of all of it. So, let me know! And, you know, thanks again!

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><p>Puck wasn't sure how the glee club always managed to fall apart right before a competition, but it never failed. Maybe it would be good luck, seeing as how it was commonplace for them and they'd managed to pull it all together every other time. But, then again, two of the team members weren't talking to each other and one of the most important members wasn't talking to <em>anyone<em>, so it wasn't exactly like the other times. But Santana was still there telling everyone she hated them, so it was kind of the same.

Finn sunk down into the seat next to Puck, his fingers tapping nervously on his knees even as his legs bobbed up and down anxiously. The tall teen was often a giant blob of nervous energy, and minutes before they were set to be on stage in front of hundreds of people didn't help the situation. Neither did all the tension in the room, which is why after about a solid minute and a half, Puck couldn't help but reach across himself and sock Finn in the shoulder.

"Shit, dude," Finn growled, lifting the one hand that had been playing a beat on his knee to the arm Puck had hit. He rubbed the spot gingerly, glaring at Puck. "What the Hell?"

"You're buggin' me."

Puck hadn't really talked to Finn since blowing up at glee rehearsal earlier in the week. Not that the two teens were at odds again. It was a strange paradox, but even though everything they'd been through together had been shitty and very un-friend-like, the history alone made them sort of closer. There were things about each other's lives that only the other would really understand, including the rough-and-tumble road of loving Rachel Berry. It was, however, also the one thing neither of them dared to talk about with the other. And that was especially true now that Finn and Quinn were officially on the outs. Puck figured the Finn/Rachel duet would be the final nail in the coffin, the two teens resurrecting their lost relationship before the New Directions' set was even done.

And the real fucked up part was Puck couldn't even get pissed about it. For one, he'd tried once and it hadn't done any good. But, mainly, it was because he'd come to accept that it was all his fault. He'd given up his right to care what Rachel did, and J-Money help him, that included _who_ she did. Never in his life did he want to believe that there was a chance that Finn could do it better than him, but considering his despicable performance in almost every avenue of a real relationship, Puck really didn't have a choice in the matter. Finn couldn't do much worse.

"Where's Rach?" Finn asked, frowning when Puck just shrugged in response. "Did she tell you where she was going? She wouldn't really talk to me, before or after the whole thing with Quinn."

"No one cares about your stupid mating rituals, Finnocent," Santana snarled, crossing her arms in front of her chest. "Sack up and find the midget."

"Why should I?"

"I'm not going to go on stage in front of hundreds of people if our lead soloist is just going to blow it."

"She can do it," Puck defended quickly, angrily. Santana's abrasiveness normally didn't even faze him, but he was always a little more sensitive to what was said about Rachel. Clearly the breakup hadn't changed that about him, either.

"It might help if she heard that," Finn suggested.

"Well then go tell her," Puck basically grunted, switching to cross his left leg over his right. Finn didn't say anything, but Puck could feel his stare on him and after another minute or two he couldn't take it anymore. He blew out a heavy breath, turning his head to face his former best friend. "_Fine_. I'll do it."

Puck pushed his hands on his knees, using the extra force to lift him up. He walked through the back corridor of the theater and toward the front, knowing Rachel wouldn't be far from her and Finn's starting place. That only gave him a couple of minutes to think of whatever inspiring thing he was supposed to come up with in an effort to bring her out of her funk, and frankly that wasn't enough time. His brain was basically a jumbled mess, and had been for the past month – increasing in severity over the last couple of days. Aside from random snippets about how much of an idiot he was, the choreography for their set, and his work schedule, Puck was basically useless.

"Hey," he said in way of warning when he found her, invading her personal time and space all in two final steps. "We're up after the next two groups."

Rachel nodded absently, swiping her tongue across her lips as she straightened her posture. Her hands rubbed absently over her bare knees, her fingers playing with the hem of her brightly colored dress. She lifted her eyes to look forward, noting Puck's matching tie. She itched to stand up and fix the askew accessory, but at the same time she found its reckless placement kind of endearing.

"Ya'okay?"

She blinked in surprise, absorbing the concern in his voice just as much as his proximity. He'd all but avoided her like the plague after their time at the zoo yesterday, which wasn't too easy considering they'd spent all morning practicing their set. Occasionally she'd catch his eye and see a flash of something she swore she remembered from before, but she didn't trust herself anymore to recognize it. Sometimes she'd close her eyes and picture them still together, so it wouldn't be hard for her imagination to take her delusions to a new level.

"You were right," he blurted out, a hard exhale coming out along with the confession. "Before. You said you knew me, and you were right." He didn't want her to know how much truth was in that statement, so he quickly added, "But I know you, too. And this isn't you."

Rachel frowned, her breath shallow as her eyes followed his movement from standing in front of her to sitting next to her. He was the epitome of casual, his legs crossing in front of himself while his head tilted back to rest against the wall. His eyes were on her and she couldn't help the shaky inhale she took at the intensity in his gaze.

"Rachel Berry would never sit quietly, by herself, while her team was seconds away from coming off the hinges."

"I guess I've changed."

"I told you that you didn't have to."

If she had answered quietly, Puck's response was barely above a whisper. The thing about trying to bring everything back to how it used to be was that it was impossible if you acknowledged the part you were pretending didn't exist. Allowing himself to not just think about those times when anything seemed possible but to talk about them would only perpetuate the heartache. And, yes, he had accepted the fact that that was what he was experiencing. Bitterly and only to himself.

"Patience is a valuable lesson."

"So I've heard," he joked, hearing the playfulness even in her quiet response. Maybe it was possible for them to go back to the joking and witty barbs, but he wasn't there yet. At least not in reference to their physical relationship. That was one landmine he'd have to bypass quickly. "But I've waited long enough to hear your solo, so you better not chicken out on me."

He grinned at her resulting smile, watching it spread wide enough that it hit her eyes. He missed that smile, and he especially missed being the one who put it there. "It's time to show New York what you're made of, babe."

Rachel exhaled a sound that was a mix between a giggle and a sob, her mouth opening to delve deeper into her conversation with him before Finn's voice cut through the moment. Both teens turned their heads forward and regarded their tall friend. And while she couldn't say for sure for Puck, Rachel couldn't help but feel a sense of déjà vu. Here they were, in almost the same exact position they had been before the big championship game back in January, Puck and her tucked away in a private area of hallway, and Finn interrupting them seconds before they were so close to resolving something that Rachel could _feel_ was important.

"Yes, I'm ready," she finally answered, nodding her head as she and Puck both stood. Her eyes moved back to Puck, noting the way the two boys shared a loaded expression before he started to walk away. "Noah," she stopped gently, waiting for him to turn back toward her before she continued, "after you hear it, let me know if I got it right."

"Will do," he answered on a bob of his head, turning around and jogging back to the greenroom. Everyone sighed in relief when he returned, Puck nodding his head in answer to the question no one dared to ask. After that they quickly moved to their positions on either side of the stage, their ears perking up when the emcee announced their "Right" set was starting. The room immediately quieted from the crowd's leftover applause and quick mingling, the opening bars of the familiar light rock song grabbing their attention. Everyone's eyes moved forward and the rest of New Directions couldn't help but laugh lightly when Finn's voice echoed from the back, causing the crowd to whip back toward the exit.

Richard Marx's "Right Here Waiting" wasn't actually a duet, but the second Rachel's voice joined Finn's there was no denying that it worked. And taking into account Quinn's expression, even with the recent sting of their breakup, no one could deny the chemistry that Finn and Rachel shared. The emotion in their voices was matched only by that in their gazes, even their movements so purposeful that it told a story. A story that Puck wished wasn't real.

_Wherever you go_

_Whatever you do_

_I will be right here waiting for you_

_Whatever it takes_

_Or how my heart breaks_

_I will be right here waiting for you_

The curtain whooshed by the rest of the glee club as Rachel and Finn's duet faded out, the first bars of Akon's song starting up without missing a beat. The duet partners moved fluidly into their spots just as Artie came out and began his verses, completely changing the tone of the performance. It was risky, but the crowd seemed to appreciate the group's choreography but also their ability to move seamlessly from two drastically different songs. And then three, the hip-hop chords changing to old-school pop while the girls exited and the boys took center stage. Puck, Sam, Kurt, Blaine, and Mike lined up in the front, performing the classic dance moves to the song and earning a roaring cheer as a result.

_Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh_

_The right stuff_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh_

_The right stuff_

Even old ladies were screaming and yelling like ten-year-old girls, every single female basically hyperventilating at the tantalizing lyrics paired with the boys' adorable but sexy dance moves. It reminded Puck of his stint on the Acafellas, as embarrassing as even that memory was. The saxophone from the girls' number started to filter through the hit New Kids on the Block song, the boys altering their dance steps as the girls came out again. The group shared a minute or so of choreography before the boys were literally pushed off stage, the girls using the independence and confidence of the tune to command the stage. Santana and Mercedes broke from the pack, finally having an excuse to use their diva attitudes as they tackled the first lyrics of Jennifer Lopez's "Get Right" before blending their voices back with the rest of the girls for the chorus.

_I'm about to sign you up, we can get right_

_Before the night is up, we can get right_

_We can get right (we can get right)_

_We can get right_

_I'm about to fill your cup, we can get right_

_Before the night is up, we can get right_

_We can get right (tonight)_

_We can get right_

One by one, the girl's slipped backstage until only Rachel was left. The saxophone repeated several times, giving her some time to catch her breath and even more time for the crowd's excitement to die down. New Directions was telling a story about love, and something she knew all too well was that it wasn't always a happy tale. This one talked about losing love, wanting to get it back, meeting someone new, feeling that person start to slip away, and now, with her song, losing it all over again.

Rachel took one step so she was right in front of the microphone at center stage, her hand shaking as it lifted to grip the small device. Her nerves had never been a problem before, but she'd also never sung a song that she didn't just connect with, but _wrote_. The lyrics weren't just a story, they were her story. _Their_ story.

Her eyes closed at the thought, only opening again after she turned and looked stage left. She'd done it at every practice, trying to find him on the sidelines when she sang, but he'd never been there. This time, however, he was. He wasn't alone, but all she could see was him. Puck was staring at her intently, and she drew strength from his gaze as the opening bars of her song started.

_What have I done_

_I wish I could run_

_Away from this ship going under_

_Just trying to help_

_Hurt everyone else_

_Now I feel the weight of the world_

_Is on my shoulders_

_What can you do_

_When your good isn't good enough_

_And all that you touch tumbles down_

'_Cause my best intentions_

_Keep making a mess of things_

_I just wanna fix it somehow_

_But how many times will it take?_

_Oh how many times will it take_

_For me to get it right_

_To get it right_

_Can I start again_

_With my faith shaken_

'_Cause I can't go back and undo this_

_I just have to stay_

_And face my mistakes_

_But if I get stronger and wiser_

_I'll get through this_

_What can you do_

_When your good isn't good enough_

_And all that you touch tumbles down_

'_Cause my best intentions_

_Keep making a mess of things_

_I just want to fix it somehow_

_But how many times will it take_

_Oh, how many times will it take_

_For me to get it right_

_So I throw up my fist_

_Throw a punch in the air_

_And accept the truth_

_That sometimes life isn't fair_

_Yeah I'll send out a wish_

_I'll send up a prayer_

_That finally someone will see_

_How much I care_

_What can you do_

_When your good isn't good enough_

_And all that you touch tumbles down_

'_Cause my best intentions_

_Keep making a mess of things_

_I just want to fix it somehow_

_But how many times will it take_

_Oh how many times will it take_

_For me to get it right_

_To get it right_

An hour later, it still hadn't sunk in that they had won. New Directions wasn't just some lame extra-curricular activity filled with a bunch of geeks and outcasts. They were _national_ champions. They didn't just beat the neighborhood school or even the local rivals. They had traveled all the way to New York City, faced handfuls of other glee clubs, and they had won. It was definitely just cause for everyone going out to celebrate. Well, almost everyone.

Rachel had faked being sick and stayed in her room while everyone else went out. Everyone except Puck. He knew she had faked it, so he'd made up some lame story, too. He needed some answers, and he wasn't about waiting until she was ready to give them. He knocked on her door, shaking his head comically. So much for learning patience.

"Noah?" Rachel questioned instantly, opening the door wider. "Why aren't you out with every …"

"Did you write that song because of us?" He rushed out, never one for beating around the bush. "Because of me?"

Her silence spoke volumes, which was saying something considering how much she'd actually said during the song. He'd only heard it once, but the lyrics washed over him again as he brushed past her, moving all the way inside her room. There was part of him that wanted to believe she could have written it for Finn, or just because they needed a song for nationals – that would have been easier - but the look on her face now and the ones she'd tossed his way during her performance told him otherwise.

"How could you even think that?" He asked in disbelief.

Rachel scoffed in response, wondering if he was playing dumb or if he _really_ hadn't been present for the past month. Instead, she bit her tongue and leaned against the wall on the other side of where he was. "Well, you're over there and I'm over here." She shrugged sadly, crossing her arms over her chest, wishing she was wearing more than just a silly memorabilia T-shirt and a pair of tiny shorts that she wore for bed. "That's clearly evidence that I messed up somewhere along the way."

"It wasn't you, Rach."

"Can we … can we not do this?" She pleaded, her resolve breaking slightly. "Once was bad enough. I'm fairly certain I can't do it again."

Puck stared at her from across the room, the lyrics washing over him again. He was the one who had hurt everyone else by trying to make everything right. He'd pushed her away because he thought she deserved better, and the only thing he'd done was break them both. And he couldn't undo what he'd done, but he'd learned from his mistakes and he wanted to fix it. He'd seen the damage he'd caused and now he really wanted to make it right. _Get it right_.

"You were right," he started, the confession sounding so similar to right before New Directions had went on stage that he absently wondered how close he had been to telling her the truth earlier. "I _was_ scared."

It didn't seem possible, or all that healthy, but Rachel was sure her heart stopped. The memory of their breakup flashed across her mind, and she would have flat-lined if he hadn't started to walk closer to her. He didn't stop until he was right in front of her, and she didn't just feel her heart beat again, but it picked up speed dramatically, nearly bursting from her chest like it was calling out to him.

"I was embarrassed because I ruined it for us, and I thought I was doin' the right thing by lettin' you go." He shrugged, feeling stupid and itching to bolt so badly that he reached out to place his hands on her hips just to keep himself from moving. "I'm shit at everything and the one thing I'm supposed to rock I fucked up."

His head sagged in shame, not being able to take Rachel's wide stare any longer. But that apparently wasn't acceptable, her hands skimming over his arms and up his shoulders before each rested on his cheeks. She forced his gaze back up, only letting go when she knew he wasn't going to drop it again.

"Who said you ruined anything?" Puck scoffed and rolled his eyes, detaching from her so quickly that she could only wrap her arms around herself to keep them from hanging helplessly in front of her. "I loved you, Noah." Her voice cracked, but she continued anyway. "It wasn't exactly pages ripped from an erotic novel, but it was … real. It was us." She lifted her shoulder emptily, thinking that probably wasn't enough for him. Men and women viewed sex in very different ways, and clearly her idea of satisfying was not the same as his. "And I thought we'd have a lot of other times to make it perfect."

Puck had been pacing inside the small hotel room, but he stopped abruptly when his brain finally registered Rachel's words. "Loved?" He questioned harshly, his eyebrows furrowing as he regarded her from across the room. Her gaze fell down to her feet and he felt a wave of panic crash over him. It _was_ his fault. He blew it. Desperately, he moved back to stand in front of her, lifting his hand to her chin to tilt her head back up. "Do you still love me?"

"Do you still love me?" She volleyed right back, her voice as broken as she had felt this entire month. In his arms, though, she started to feel whole again. The shattered pieces of her heart seemed to meld back together, the vital organ beating rapidly as her entire being waited to hear his response.

Puck didn't just hear what she said, he heard everything. He heard the way her shoulders slumped in, heard the same memories running through his mind flash across hers. Five words shouldn't have completely wrecked him, but they did. Because he heard what she meant. He knew that she was calling his bluff. She had changed, but she wasn't running away from it. She had grown during their relationship and she'd seen the value in that instead of being scared of it. Now, he had to do the same thing.

"I never stopped," he choked out milliseconds before her lips crashed against his. The vice grip that had been strangling his insides for the past few weeks immediately loosened, blood rushing through his veins along with the emotion he felt pouring out of Rachel. Her tiny hands gripped at his shoulders while he moved his arms to encircle her waist tighter, bringing her closer to him. It had been far too long since they'd done this, and he was never surer in his life that he would do anything to keep him from losing her again.

Rachel whimpered into the staggered assault that followed their passionate embrace, both of them releasing their lips to gasp for air but refusing to lose the connection. His lips immediately moved to her neck and Rachel's hands were everywhere. She fisted the loose fabric of his T-shirt until it rode up enough that she felt the first contact of bare skin. Her hands crept underneath the garment, tracing the contours of his abs and chest before skimming down his sides and then up his back.

Puck shuddered at the attention, suctioning his lips back over hers again, his tongue delving deep into her mouth. He moaned at the minty flavor that hit his taste buds, letting the tip of his tongue run across the roof of her mouth before pulling out just to plunge back in again. Her nails dug into the skin of his shoulder blades and he grunted in response, using his body to push her against the wall while his hands gripped the hem of her shirt. He pulled back from her mouth only long enough to remove the piece of clothing, nipping at her bottom lip and then swiping his tongue over the pouty, swollen flesh.

It didn't make sense, but Rachel was stuck somewhere between feeling every atom in her body bursting in excitement and feeling completely detached from herself. Her heart was fluttering like a hummingbird and she could feel her knees shaking even though she'd never felt stronger in her whole life. Her mind was racing and her hands were moving as if they had a mind of her own. At least that was her excuse for why they were fingering his belt buckle and then the button and zipper of his jeans.

"S-shit," he cursed when he felt her dip her hand into his boxers, his head drooping down to her shoulder as he inhaled a ragged breath. He only let himself have those few seconds of reprieve, though, moving his lips over her shoulder, collar bone, then down her chest. When he bent down enough to run his tongue over her nipple, Rachel's hands couldn't reach down far enough to tease him. In response, she scraped her nails up his torso, Puck groaning loudly when she passed over his nipple.

Even as he moved to pay her other breast the same amount of loving attention, his hands crept down her sides and over her ass, stopping when he hit her thighs. He gripped the soft, tight flesh and straightened his posture, lifting her swiftly as his lips found hers again. Rachel gasped when she felt his erection press into her core, Puck swallowing the noise but creating one of his own when her legs wrapped tightly around him.

Rachel used her back for leverage, grinding herself down onto him, desperate to relieve the pressure she felt building up. She pulled away from the kiss gasping for air, her chest rising and falling harshly as Puck moved from her lips back to her neck. Her head tilted to one side and she moaned when she felt his teeth graze over the sensitive skin, his tongue darting out to probe against her pulse point. She rocked her pelvis harder, pushing him off balance enough that she used the distance she had created to rid Puck of his T-shirt, too.

She was already light-headed, but when Puck circled his strong arms around her waist and spun them around, Rachel was downright dizzy. She barely noticed his faltered steps to the bed, or the different feel of the mattress on her back in comparison to the hard surface of the wall. The only thing she was focused on was Puck's body pressed intimately against hers, his bare, heated skin setting her on fire from the outside in. All she cared about was making that feeling last, making it better.

Puck smacked a kiss to her lips before lifting up to his knees and then off the bed, ushering her hands away from him the whole time. Her eyes were half-closed but he recognized the lust swirling in the chocolate depths and had no power to deny it, to deny her. In a flash, he yanked her pajama shorts down the full length of her never-ending tanned legs, taking a second to press a tender kiss to her ankle before letting the limbs fall back carelessly to the bed. He stepped out of the jeans that were already pooled by his feet, and then lowered his boxers to join the other discarded clothing.

Rachel wanted to keep his gaze as he lowered back down over her, resting the bulk of his weight on his left forearm while his right hand brushed slowly up her body, but she couldn't. She had a million different emotions coursing through her and the one she'd last seen swimming around in his hazel eyes was the last straw. It was all too much for her to handle, too much for her to take without saying anything.

"Noah …" She trailed off when he nipped at the spot where her neck met her shoulder, her eyes shutting tighter in an effort to focus. "Are we … I mean, is this …" She swallowed thickly, her breath only leveling off when he pulled back enough that he could see her expression. Only the small noise of her mouth prying open and their breaths mingling between them could be heard, and she again had to force herself to remember why she'd said anything to begin with. "I don't want this to be over. After tonight, I mean. I don't … I can't … I _refuse _to have this be a spur of the moment decision that is regretted later."

Puck stared into her eyes and suddenly couldn't look away. In a flash he saw the past six months of his life course through her eyes, conversations and thoughts echoing in his mind.

He was an ass, but a good man.

She was family.

Noah versus Puck.

It was her choice.

Love.

She was his girl.

Sex.

He was better than Lima.

Magic.

This was completely natural.

And then, when he dipped down to whisper in her ear that she was never getting rid of him and Rachel responded by rolling her hips just perfectly that their bodies connected as one, he could only think of one thing: They fit.

Rachel gasped at the feel of him inside her, adjusting to his size all over again as he seemingly adjusted to the feel of her as well. He waited only a beat or two before moving his hips, her breath hitching more and more with each thrust. They hadn't had much foreplay beforehand, but she was already so close that it only took a few more precise gyrations before she felt herself start to come undone, her eyes fluttering closed while her mouth slacked open.

Puck outstretched his arms and held his torso up with his hands, watching Rachel let go and groaning at the way her face distorted in pleasure. His name fell off her lips like honey dripping from a jar, and he rocked into her a little harder in response. He could feel the throbbing of her muscles start to deter off, his tolerance much higher when she wasn't constricting around him so tightly, and began moving his hips rhythmically once again.

Rachel gasped when she felt him pick up speed, her eyes opening in shock and then dancing when she saw his trademark smirk spread over his face. Some things, it seemed, would never change. He clearly had something to prove, and she didn't mind in the least succumbing to his will. She let him curl his fingers under her knee, encouraged him when he lifted the limb and kissed the sensitive underside skin, and all out squeaked when he hooked the appendage high over his hip, changing the angle just enough that it took her by surprise.

"Noah!" She shouted, feeling the wave of pleasure that she had just felt begin to crash over her again, the friction he was creating against her center pushing her over the edge once more. Whether to shut her up or to come when she called, his lips covered hers in a desperate kiss. She tried to respond to the embrace as she normally did, but her lips and tongue were acting as if independent from the rest of her body, focused only on struggling to breathe and repeating his name in breathless whispers.

"Fuck, B," Puck grunted, not knowing how much more he could take after her last orgasm. They were covered in sweat but it paled in comparison to the heat being emitted from her core. She was on fire and she was setting him ablaze, too. Everything she did seemed to ignite something new in him, and the familiar coiling in his stomach was indication that he was only seconds away from burning alive. "I love you."

She wanted to say it back, but as he came he just kept repeating it over and over again, drowning her out in the best possible way. His lips were right by her ear and every new occurrence of the phrase flowing out of him so effortlessly drifted to a different place inside her. Her brain, her heart, her soul. They all took comfort in the words, Rachel letting out a long, satisfied moan while he pumped into her three final times and then collapsed onto her small frame. She was out of breath before and adding a hundred and sixty or so pounds should have made it worse, but Rachel had honestly never felt lighter than she did at that moment.

"I mean it," he panted, swallowing short, desperate breaths of air all while peppering kisses on the exposed skin of her shoulder. "I love you."

Rachel wrapped her arms around his neck, refusing to let him move away from her. She didn't care if he was squashing her. She wanted him close. She _needed_ him close. "I love you, too."

Puck feathered his fingers over her sides, tickling her enough that she loosened her grip and he was able to swap their positions, Rachel giggling a little as her head fell down to his shoulder once she was on top of him. He let his hand run up and down her back slowly, moving some of her hair to join the rest that had cascaded over his arm. They both still had a glossy sheen of sweat sticking to their bodies, but their breathing had not only started to regulate but blend together. When he inhaled, so did she. When he exhaled, she also let out a breath. The whole thing was so foreign to him and intimate that he finally understood what all those chick flicks meant when they talked about the difference between having sex and making love. It was _this_. It was basking in the feeling of sharing something so special instead of rushing to replace your clothes and avoiding the other person's gaze out of shame and regret. It was _them_. It was something he'd never had before and yet something he was already certain he'd never be able to live without.

"You were wrong yesterday," he said, his voice low and hoarse. Rachel picked her head up off his shoulder, her chin resting on his pectoral as she regarded him. "I do need you."

Puck saw her eyes water slightly and picked his head up off the pillow to press his lips against hers. He could feel her melt under his embrace, and would have moved past all the mushy bullshit onto what he liked to call round two if he didn't owe her a million times over for ruining their collective lives for the past month. Thankfully that's as long as it lasted; he didn't consider it until just then, but Rachel hadn't just changed who he was, she had become a part of him. She had helped him become the man he was meant to be, always by his side during everything with school and Beth and glee. Even little things like getting his car and encouraging him at temple. It wasn't until she was gone did he realize how important she was.

"I always have."

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><p><strong>Author's Note #2:<strong> I can't link to youtube, but I have to add a disclaimer that none of the songs used are mine, just the crazy order and idea behind using them together. I gave subtle credit in the actual text, but the lyrics are from "Right Here Waiting" by Richard Marx, (Akon's "Right Now" was again referenced but no lyrics), "The Right Stuff" by NKoTB, "Get Right" by Jennifer Lopez, and Glee's original song "Get It Right", respectively.


	21. The End is Really the Beginning

**Author's Note:** It was touch-and-go for awhile there, but I actually did end up writing an epilogue. It wasn't done by Sunday (obviously), but I think its length should more than make up for the lapse in update time. I just had these two ideas in my head that I couldn't let go, and even though I thought the ending was perfect (I mean that in a very modest way), I think this epilogue ties up all the remaining loose ends and is just a fun little bow at the end of this story.

I want to take a second to thank EVERYONE who read and reviewed this story, whether you've been with me from day one or if you just found this story (or if you're like me and stalk the completed fics archives and don't review until I change the status from in-progress to completed). Your support and encouragement was/is INSANE and I can't thank you enough. I did my best to reply to most of the reviews individually because honestly you guys blew me away, but some of you don't allow private messages and with the review reply thing broken, I had no way to express my gratitude. So, THANK YOU to those people, too. And special shout out to Jann for holding my hand this this part (and many others, too).

Lastly, a bit of a disclaimer. The song that is used in this update (and actually inspired pretty much the last five chapters of the story) is not mine. It is also not a duet, but rather Lifehouse's "Falling In" and I absolutely love it, so please go to youtube and check it out if you've never listened before.

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><p>Rachel exhaled an unsteady breath, her eyes focused outside the passenger door window as they pulled into the McKinley parking lot. Her eyes traveled over the expanse of students loitering around the other cars and the front entrance of the school. The expressions were an equal mix of disappointment and excitement, sometimes both emotions visible on the same student. She knew her face probably had telltale signs of anxiety written all over it, but she was accustomed to screwing on a smile and projecting her enthusiasm over any of those other more negative feelings.<p>

Puck, on the other hand, was used to appearing completely ambivalent. It was his patented expression and was only overshadowed by his trademark smirk and sinister behavior. Nothing as elementary as the first day of school was going to change that, and Rachel was sure once he woke up completely he'd no doubt exude his perfected apathy. At that moment, however, it looked like he was just struggling to move the gear shift from drive to park. In hindsight she wondered if it had been safe for him to drive with his eyes half closed.

"Noah."

He pried his eyes open wider than before, startled by the force in her voice. It was barely past seven in the morning, and there was no viable excuse for raising one's voice that early. Except maybe morning sex, but Rachel had already nixed that idea when he'd come by her house to pick her up. Not that she wasn't _ever _up for it; they'd been back together for a little more than a month now and it was easily the best month of his life. One-night stands and random hookups with hot girls was fun and all, but the sexploration of Rachel Berry? Epic.

Puck tried to hide his grin, busying himself with the task of turning the keys in the ignition so the engine dulled to a stop, the quiet hush of the radio dying, too. "It's barely past seven, B."

"You've been getting up this early all summer for work."

"I was gettin' paid for that shit, though."

"There's just as much value in schoolwork even if it can't be measured by monetary gain."

"I prefer it to be measured in pieces of clothing," he leered, leaning over the console and pressing his lips against hers. He could feel the heat of her embarrassment burning off her cheeks and let his imagination run wild with images of all the other places her skin might be flushed. Hot. Tight. Pink.

He shuddered as he pulled away, his breath ragged and his eyes purposely avoiding focusing on her face. He had to get through the entire school day without screwing her brains out, and he wouldn't even make it to the first bell if he saw her swollen, pouty lips or that crazy lustful gaze she always had after they kissed. Everyone assumed that because Puck was so used to going from one woman to the next that he'd get sick of Rachel (Santana had eloquently said something about fucking her out of his system). But, oddly enough, the opposite was true.

In almost the same way that she was the only one who was able to keep his attention long enough to hold an actual conversation, Rachel had a power over him in the bedroom that was borderline unhealthy. Despite their terrible first attempt (she still says it wasn't but bullshit), sex was the thing that Puck was supposed to have the upper hand on. She had the brains and the talent and whatever, but he had the experience that should have had her in the palm of his hands, begging for it. But, even after he'd redeemed himself, the only one who seemed to turn into putty was _him_. It was a strange paradox, to be completely, utterly, totally satisfied and so undeniably not at the same time. Every sack session just had him craving the next, going mad for it like a sexually frustrated tween.

Luckily he didn't exactly have to beg for it, as Rachel definitely made good on her speech at the celibacy club meeting in sophomore year. She focused more on the feelings and used flowery terms about love and connecting intimately instead of calling it boning or fucking like him, but she was just sugarcoating the truth. And the truth, as awesome as it was, was that she was a freak. Not in the way that the jocks and losers at school said, and not in the creepy _Swimfan_ kind of way, but in a perfect blend of exhibitionism and experimentalism and flexibility and … Shit.

"I know that look, Noah," she chastised lightly, a smile in her voice to match the one on her face. She distracted herself from the fact that his eyes had turned all but black by opening the car door, stepping out of the car confidently even though she felt anything but. It was their senior year and she was dating one of the most popular boys in school. She should be on top of the world, but she couldn't shake the feeling that everything was seconds away from blowing up in her face.

She'd been happy like this before. Well, not quite, but that just made it worse. She'd been happy with Finn when they'd started the first day of school, and look how that turned out. Now here she was, doing it all over again, even _happier_ this time around and that just had to equal trouble, right? Like, it took a couple months with Finn, but now that she was happier, maybe it would only take a few weeks. Or a day.

"You know how to make the look go away, too."

Sex appeal dripped from his tone and she couldn't do anything but look past her shoulder and pretend to give him a stern look. Say nothing for the way her heart fluttered and her stomach knotted pleasantly. "We talked about this."

"No," he said on a shake of his head, prying his backpack out of the backseat and slinging it over his shoulder as he closed his door. "We're _talking _about it." He nodded once before starting to walk in step with her, going for adorable and not pestering like she'd claimed earlier. "Present tense, as in able to sway your previously lame answer."

"Lame because you do not agree?" She asked bemused, biting her lip when his arm came to rest across her shoulders. Rachel tilted her head up and regarded him. "Your English teacher is going to be so impressed that you know the difference between past and present tense."

"Whatever," he mumbled, the corners of his mouth drooping slightly. "English sucks."

"I think it's adorable that you are unhappy that we won't share the class anymore."

"Yea, well," he shrugged self-consciously, still not completely comfortable showing his softer side. "It's just 'cause I'm gonna have to find someone else to copy off of."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "She won't, however, be pleased with your incessant usage of informal contractions. Nor the way you end sentences with prepositions, nor …"

"Are these reasons she won't be happy or reasons _you_ aren't?" Rachel glared at him, likely because he'd interrupted her and not necessarily because he was wrong. "How do you even know my English teacher is a chick?"

"I know she's _female_ because, unlike you, I've actually taken time to evaluate my course schedule in anticipation of the upcoming year." Suddenly she stopped walking, dragged a step or two forward simply because Puck's arm was still secured around her. "You do know that glee club is now an official class, right?"

"Are you serious?"

"Noah!" She admonished, reaching into his jean pocket for what he assumed was the official printed paper with his schedule on it. He'd taken it out earlier and stuffed it inside his backpack, but he wasn't going to tell her that just yet. It felt too good to have her rooting around so close to his junk and she probably would have continued long enough for him to come in his pants if he hadn't let out a soft moan and startled her. "Noah, give it to me!"

Puck chuckled as a few people nearby made lewd and suggestive comments, Rachel's cheeks blushing furiously. "Serves you right."

Rachel managed to be embarrassed and pissed off at the same time, which wasn't exactly helping his current situation all that much. Maybe it was because he was so used to women being pissed at him, but there really wasn't anything sexier than a riled up Rachel Berry. Unfortunately, they were standing in the middle of a crowded area so even discreetly adjusting himself didn't seem possible. He couldn't very well plow her right then and there either, so he shifted his backpack in front of him to hide his little problem (fuck that – big problem. Huge.) and reached inside for the paper she'd been looking for. He also grabbed a worn notebook, the reason he'd moved the schedule to inside his bag in the first place.

"It's right here, Noah." She barely skimmed the document for ten seconds and clear as day in the slot for his last class was the words SHOW CHOIR. She shook her head, using her index finger to point at the class as she looked up at him with fire in her eyes, but then her expression moved to perplexed halfway into her diatribe. "Mr. Schuester talked to Principal Figgins after nationals and they added glee to the curriculum as another fine art elective. I mentioned this earli … what's that?"

"S'for you." He extended the notebook out to her, watching with a grin as she traded him his schedule for the notebook. Some people wondered how he could stand listening to her talk so much all the time, but they just didn't know how to shut her up. There were, in fact, three ways, and he'd just implemented his third favorite. "_But_ I only want you to use it if you have a shitty day."

Rachel blinked a few times as she stared at the worn notebook, noting Puck's lazy scrawl on the cover indicating that it was private property and anyone caught reading it would be killed. Honestly, it said that - in graphic albeit completely ridiculous detail. She eventually lifted her head up to look back at Puck, her eyebrows knitting together in confusion. He dipped down into her personal space and she found herself leaning into him even more than she already were, which meant there was absolutely no room left between them. His breath danced across her neck, Rachel clutching the notebook in her hands tightly as she fought to keep her eyes from fluttering closed.

"Otherwise, you have to give me somethin' I want, and I think we both know what that is."

Puck grinned wickedly, both their eyes moving in the same direction, the janitorial closet looking particularly inviting at that moment in his opinion. Rachel, however, was queen of willpower and simply nodded her head before moving the notebook from her hands to her own backpack. The hallways were becoming increasingly crowded, the sheer amount of people greeting Puck as they passed by ruining any chance they might have had at holding a private conversation. Rachel swallowed thickly as she tried not to think of their parting as anything more than a temporary endeavor, but must have failed miserably given the look of concern on Puck's face as he veered them off course to stand by her locker.

"Why do you think I'll have an unpleasant day?" Rachel asked quietly, wondering if he had the same worries she did. She had dropped her chin to her chest and kept her gaze down, but Puck hooked his index finger underneath to prop it back up. How he managed to express his trepidation with such a smoldering look was beyond her. It didn't matter what he did or what he wanted or asked for – if he gave her that look, she would do anything for him. Hopefully he didn't know that, though.

"You've been weird about today for awhile," he answered vaguely, not wanting to expound upon his thoughts anymore than that. He wasn't nearly as smart as she was, but he was good at reading people – especially her – and he could tell what she was thinking. It was the same thing everyone else at the school was: How long would it last this time?

"She's been weird for a lot longer than that, Puckerman."

Rachel had gotten so used to the Latina in the recent months that the insults really didn't faze her anymore. Santana lost quite a bit of her bite once Rachel and Puck started dating, even more so when she started seeing Brittany. Rachel knew they'd never be friends, or really even get along, but she couldn't help but feel some civility for the former Cheerio, who'd drunkenly confessed how much she'd admired Puck and Rachel and their relationship. Plus, like it or not, Santana had been there for Puck during the month they were separated, and she'd apparently given him some advice that he'd taken to heart.

"Better weird than a bitch," Puck shot back, never taking his eyes off Rachel. She simply nodded in approval, though he wasn't sure if it was for defending her or in permission to leave their serious conversation for later. Maybe both, as she lifted to her tiptoes, placed a quick kiss on his lips, and left. Puck turned his head and watched her go, only taking his eyes off her when he heard Santana groan loudly.

"You two are pathetic, you know that?"

Puck moved the hand that had been dedicated to touching Rachel up to the strap of his backpack, gripping it loosely. "Get off my back, San. I'm already getting shit from Q about power couple status and some shit. I can't take your crazed jealousy, too."

"We promised never to speak of that night," she growled, Puck rolling his eyes in response as he made his way to his first class.

It had taken him a lot longer than it should have, but Puck finally understood who his real friends were, and – sometimes unfortunately – Santana was one of them. Much like him, she'd changed a lot after joining glee club. He might have made it his objective sometime during freshman year to ruin the lives of every single person in the glee club, but things were different now. They'd all been through a lot and for better or for worse the club had stuck together, through it all. It was like Mercedes had said; they were a family.

A fucked up, incestuous, antagonizing, diverse family.

"Are you actually going to class?" She asked in shock, following him into the room and looking around like him to see if there was anyone else in the class that they knew. Quinn and Sam were sitting in the back corner and Puck and Santana shared a hesitant look before joining them.

"Wow. You really have changed, haven't you?" Quinn asked absently, twirling her pink-colored pen in her hand and smiling at Sam. "Ruling this school might be easier than I thought."

"I always knew you liked it on top."

Sam laughed at Puck's joke then stopped when Quinn glared at him. Puck rolled his eyes and turned in his seat toward the front of the classroom. Two freshman girls whipped around in hopes of not being caught staring at him, and he sighed when Santana, Sam, and Quinn all laughed around him. He was never going to stop being a stud, but Quinn was right. He had changed, and the biggest change was that he accepted that the new Puck was a better version of his previous self. Quinn hadn't figured out who she wanted to be yet, which he knew not because they were friends but because she'd immediately gotten back together with Sam after her and Finn broke up and was back in her Cheerio uniform, too.

"Did you hear Coach Bieste wants to meet during lunch?" Puck shook his head from side to side, looking back at Sam curiously. "Something about Friday's game."

"Oh, that." Puck shrugged one shoulder, turning his attention back to the front as the teacher came in. He made everyone stand up and then assigned seating alphabetically, which was perfect for Puck since it put him on the opposite side of the room as Quinn and Sam, both of who wanted to know what he clearly already did about the football meeting. It was stupid and maybe showcased just how much he _hadn't_ changed, but pissing them off would probably get him through the morning; that was important because even though he didn't know his schedule, he did know that sometime today he'd end up in an advanced math class. Suffice it to say that it hadn't been his idea, but rather an irrational decision made during one of his and Rachel's special study sessions before finals.

And, great. Now he was thinking about Rachel naked again. He needed a distraction quickly, and like fate it came in the form of a paper football. Puck rolled his eyes, not even bothering to look over at Sam or even at the note. He knew what it was asking, and if Ken and Barbie were going to be on his ass all year about social hierarchy and homecoming king and queen and class couple and whatever the hell else, then he was going to milk this for all it was worth. After all, it would no doubt be around the entire school by the next period.

_It_, of course, being what Rachel learned the second Finn walked through the door of her first period class. He was wearing a new polo shirt and sporting the same but cleaned up haircut he had last year. His backpack was slung over one shoulder and he grinned that silly lopsided smile that was utterly him before he took the seat next to her. All of that, however, was glossed over the second she saw the cast on his right arm.

"What _happened_?"

"Puck didn't tell you?" Finn sighed, thinking that was a dumb question. Obviously he hadn't because then she wouldn't have asked. "My two left feet finally did some real damage."

"You did this to yourself?"

"Well how else does someone break their arm?" She scowled at him and he chuckled lightly. "I was helping Burt at the garage yesterday, inventory and whatever. Too much crap in my hands, not enough coordination, and I fell down the stairs."

"That's _awful_!" There was so much concern in her tone that he couldn't help but smile and bow his head, reminding himself that she was off the market. "What about football?"

"Coach made me the assistant coach, which is kind of cool." He dropped the tone of his voice, looking intently at her. "It's almost better since I probably wasn't going to play college ball anyway, and the experience will be good since maybe I'll coach football while teaching."

"Teaching is a very admirable profession, Finn." Rachel smiled warmly, her hand reaching out to rest on the forearm that wasn't covered in the thick plaster. "And I know you'll be great at it."

Rachel tried not to notice the flash of love that coursed through his eyes, but ended up having to bow her head shyly to avoid the awkwardness that would have sprouted up if she hadn't. She and Puck had been back together since nationals, and their rekindled relationship was made quite obvious when Mercedes had returned to the room after getting back from the glee club's celebration to find Rachel and Puck sleeping together, naked. She'd snapped some photos for blackmail purposes, told every single person in glee club via text, and made Puck and Rachel basically be her slave for the rest of the trip just to keep her from telling Mr. Schuester what had happened. The point was, Finn didn't just know that Rachel and Puck were dating, but he knew that the relationship was serious.

"Thanks for believing in me, Rach." He looked down, too, embarrassed that he'd obviously made her uncomfortable. "And, like, don't be mad, but Puck told me about what you said to him in New York … about not needing you and … well, it's not really true, you know?"

Rachel's breath was shallow, her eyes lifting back up and focusing on Finn. The classroom was entirely full by that point and in her periphery she saw the teacher enter and start to write his name on the dry-erase board. Soon he'd make them all get up and move into assigned seats, and for the first time in probably all three years of high school, Rachel wanted to be sat furthest away from the tall teen currently next to her.

"You make us believe in ourselves."

His whispered words echoed in her mind even as she got up and the entire class switched places according to the chart the teacher had drawn up. He'd arranged them alphabetically, which didn't put Finn right next to her, but he did end up directly behind her, and she couldn't help but find the symbolism in his position. She'd always been supportive of him, _behind_ him, and now he was, too. Only not as her boyfriend, but - like he'd been during the month Puck and her were broken up – as a friend.

"Hey Rach?" She turned behind her with her breath held as she regarded him, hoping he knew the distinction. He let that lopsided grin emerge again, presenting a permanent marker toward her as well as his casted arm. "Can I have your autograph?"

She released the breath she'd been holding, her smile blinding. "Sure."

That moment had been the highlight of much of her day, almost enough to make up for the rest of the morning and afternoon. Unlike many of her classmates, Rachel had signed up for a full load of classes, and advanced placement ones at that. She'd thought that it was a brilliant idea to take care of these general education classes so when she went to Julliard, she could really focus on her career. Now, however, she worried that she had signed up for a miserable senior year, which was the only thing on her mind until she walked into her last class for the day, show choir.

There had been auditions for the glee club when they'd made it an official class. The group had just won nationals and they didn't want a bunch of people in the group who couldn't sing simply because they didn't want to take band of musical appreciation. Rachel hadn't expected many people to try out given the club's history, but she had clearly underestimated the shift in power. Given Dave Karofsky sitting by the side with a few of the other football guys and the line of girls sitting on the opposite side, slushie facials were going to be a thing of the past. Unfortunately, as Rachel took her seat, what wasn't ancient history was the way the girls at McKinley talked about Rachel.

"They already broke up once. It won't last."

Rachel had almost entirely forgotten about her worries from this morning until she heard one of the freshman girls whisper to her friends. She'd been sifting through her backpack in search of nothing in particular when the girl's harsh words hit her eardrum, and by coincidence her hand touched the worn notebook that Puck had given her this morning. She pulled out the pad of paper and examined the cover once more, ignoring the backward glance the row of girls tossed her way. Brittany and Santana walked into the room and sat over by the football guys, just as surprised to see them as she had been. Figuring it wouldn't be long before the rest of the club came in, Rachel cracked the notebook open, focusing on the first page.

_I wasn't kiddin'. I'll legit kill you_.

She smiled in spite of herself, rolling her eyes at his extended death threat and turning to the next page, which was blank. So was the next one and the next one, and by the third blank page in a row, Rachel was wondering why Puck thought this would make her day better if needed. Then, like a wave crashing over her, the next page was a mess of words written in no discernable order or way. Every millimeter of white space was utilized, words covering not just the lines but in the header and down along the margins, too. Rachel, however, couldn't get over the title, which was the only thing with a gutter of space around it.

_List of Reasons I Want Berry_

The memory of their conversation in the auditorium at the beginning of their relationship filtered through her mind, ending with him saying that he'd make her a list one day. Apparently he'd been serious, not just about making the list but when he'd admitted that it would be long. Because it wasn't just the first page that was filled. The list went on for page after page, seven in total, detailing not just body parts (there were those) or sexual acts (pretty much the entire last page, clearly written more recently) but silly things like the way she tied her shoes, telling him her secret cookie recipe, her closeness with Sarah, calling him Noah, being a Jew, her drive, being a good friend, trustworthy, his penguin …

One after the other, Puck listed all the reasons he wanted (loved) her, and all it did was add another reason to her own list. That and it reminded her of what Mr. Schuester had said to her back in sophomore year. He'd assured her that she'd find someone who loved all the things she hated about herself and all her quirks, but Rachel wondered if he'd known it would have been Noah.

"Good book?"

Rachel's head snapped up, her eyes watery but focused entirely on Puck as he walked into the room with his standard swagger. She bolted out of her seat, past the line of girls who were currently swooning, and slammed into his arms. She held him tightly for all of four seconds and then pulled back and crashed her lips against his. Her tongue slid effortlessly into his open mouth, Rachel swallowing his moan of satisfaction and letting out her own when she felt his arms encircle her waist.

Puck had been a little taken aback by the obvious display of affection, but he wasn't complaining, either. He simply reminded himself that they were in a classroom full of students and probably seconds away from having a teacher inside, too, and made sure to keep his hands in safe areas. No boobs, no ass. His brain repeated the mantra in his head even as Rachel bit his bottom lip and then delved her tongue back inside his mouth, swirling it alongside his for just long enough that he wondered how important football practice would be but not long enough that he couldn't remember how important oxygen was.

"I'm gonna need that back." His voice was low but powerful, chasing the already warm feelings coursing through her after their kiss. Her forehead was resting against his, their breath mingling between them in an intimate dance that had her wishing the school day was over and he didn't have football practice afterward. Slowly she unhooked her arms from around his neck, the notepad sliding over his shoulder and then down his chest before he lifted his hand up to secure it enough that she could let go.

She leaned forward again, kissing him a bit more appropriately before leading the way back to her spot in the middle row. Much to the disdain of the line of girls, Puck and Rachel talked quietly amongst themselves about their days and plans for later and everything and nothing until Mr. Schuester came in. He went through introductions and expectations for this coming year. There was his standard speech about competiveness and preparation, and then segued into the official date for sectionals this year. The glee club had an automatic bid into nationals this year after their win, but he didn't want them to grow complacent. There were a lot of new members this year and that completely changed the dynamic of the group, which was something they didn't need to be told as the core group from last year was mostly sitting together while the newcomers had formed their own pod as well.

Mr. Schuester pulled the cap from his marker and wrote the words ORIGINAL SONGS on the dry erase board. Puck and Rachel looked at each other through the corner of their eyes, the latter smiling softly before she bent her head to rest on Puck's shoulder. The teacher spoke of the group's original song that won regionals, and then Rachel's song that he said clearly pushed them into first place at nationals. The future was in original songs, and he wanted them to start as soon as possible so they'd have the best ready for nationals this year.

"Mr. Schue." Puck raised his hand, surprising everyone, including Rachel even though she knew what he was garnering the teacher's attention for. "Berry and I have a song."

"I'm merely helping on vocals, Mr. Schuester. Noah wrote the song."

"You wrote a song?" Mr. Schuester asked, his surprise quickly overshadowed by pride and encouragement. "Wonderful. Class, please give Puck and Rachel your undivided attention."

"Finn, too," Puck said, looking back at the tall teen before regarding the line of new girls. "He's single, ladies."

"Shut up, dick," Finn muttered, moving from his spot next to Artie and Lauren.

"Language!" Mr. Schuester and Rachel admonished at the same time, making everyone in the room laugh while Finn got situated on the drum set. Luckily his broken arm didn't seem to affect his playing, which made it the one thing he could still do with that hand until the cast came off. Rachel stood by the piano and watched Puck sling his guitar strap over his shoulder, smiling softly as he nodded his head and started the first bar.

_Every time I see your face_

_My heart takes off on a high-speed chase_

_Now don't be scared, it's only love_

_Baby, that we're falling in_

Kurt and Mercedes immediately started swaying to Rachel's voice and the gentle chords of the guitar. She could see them swooning, and couldn't help but notice the same expression on the faces of the girls in the front row. Only _they_ were all watching Finn, even after Puck took over the lyrics.

_I can't wait till tomorrow_

_This feeling has swallowed me whole_

_And I know that I've lost control_

_This heart that I've followed_

_Has left me so hollow_

_That was then, this is now_

_Yeah, you have changed everything_

If Puck had been able to look away from Rachel at that point, he would have tossed a glance to Quinn. During rehearsals before nationals, she'd wondered where the Puck was that had sung the _Need You Now _duet with Rachel. Well, here he was. Only, not really, because this time he wasn't just singing lyrics that he felt held some meaning in their relationship. But he_ created_ words to showcase it. He'd grown up to not just realize that you didn't just have to take what you want, but you had to work for it.

_Every time I see your face_

_My heart takes off on a high-speed chase_

_Now don't be scared, it's only love_

_Baby, that we're falling in_

_I would never do you wrong_

_Or let you down or lead you on_

_Don't look down, it's only love_

_Baby, that we're falling in_

Rachel sang the chorus just like they had practiced, only now she'd really understood all the reasons that inspired him to write the song. The words held so much more meaning, and she'd almost missed her part thinking about it all. Before, because of the tone, she'd assumed he'd written the song in response to their breakup – after their reconciliation. Now, with flashes of the notebook running through her mind and Puck's voice filtering through when he took over the lyrics again, she realized he might have been writing it for their entire relationship.

_I'm standing in your driveway_

_It's midnight and I'm sideways_

_I have to find out if you feel the same_

_Won't be easy, have my doubts, too_

_But it's over without you_

_I'm just lost, incomplete_

_Yeah, you feel like home, home to me_

Rachel couldn't say for sure, but something about the last verse pushed her to sing the next part stronger. It took her back to the _Need You Now_ duet, how he compelled her to sing stronger just because he was pouring everything into his parts. Rachel and Finn had wonderful chemistry on stage, but Rachel and Puck had chemistry _everywhere_. She was drawn to him, when singing, when talking, when touching, when kissing, when …

_Every time I see your face_

_My heart takes off on a high-speed chase_

_Now don't be scared, it's only love_

_That we're falling in_

_I would never do you wrong_

_Or let you down or lead you on_

_Don't look down, it's only love_

_Baby, that we're falling in_

_Falling in_

Puck could feel her energy, pulled closer like some bizarre gravitational pull even as he moved right to the next verse.

_All those nights I stayed awake_

_Thinking of all the ways to make you mine_

_All of those smiles will never fade_

_Never run out of ways to blow my mind_

They stood directly in front of each other, Finn quieting the drums and almost no other sound but their quick inhale of breath able to be heard in the whole room. They'd managed to get the attention of every single student in the classroom, and yet they couldn't look away from one another, finally sharing the lyrics of the chorus and singing them together.

_Every time I see your face_

_My heart takes off on a high-speed chase_

_Now don't be scared, it's only love_

_Baby, that we're falling in_

_I would never do you wrong_

_Or let you down or lead you on_

_Don't look down, it's only love_

_Baby, that we're falling in_

_Don't look down, it's only love_

_Baby, that we're falling in_

Puck stopped strumming and Finn let the last hit of the cymbal echo in the room, dulled quickly by the applause and cheers of the rest of the club. Puck didn't hear any of it, though, his proximity to Rachel like an extreme version of tunnel vision. All he could hear was her, see her, smell her, feel her. And, man, did he want to taste her.

"Fell."

Rachel beamed up at him, knowing what he'd meant. "Fallen."

She giggled when he groaned, her amusement quickly turning to something a bit more primal when he sagged his head and nipped at her shoulder. Thoughts of their conversation from this morning about tenses and English vanished from her mind just like the thoughts of the school being enough to pull them apart. Now she only had one thing on her mind, and she didn't care anymore how un-Rachel Berry it seemed.

"Go to the closet. I'll be there in a minute."

Rachel whispered the words, but she might as well have had a megaphone pressed to his ear. He leaned back and looked into her eyes intently to make sure she wasn't joking, a wide grin spreading across his face in time with the shy one moving across hers. Unable to help himself, he pressed a quick kiss to her lips and then started backing away toward the door.

"I gotta take a leak!"

Mr. Schuester started to give permission, but was then interrupted by Rachel. "My throat is rather dry after the duet. May I be excused to refill my water bottle?"

Mr. Schuester agreed before addressing the class, Rachel moving to her bag to get her bottle. Kurt, Blaine, and Mercedes were sitting behind where her and Noah had been, and all three of them leaned forward. They made sure to keep their voices low, knowing Mr. Schuester wouldn't yell at them for talking since he was just going over how things were handled in the group to the newcomers.

"Thirtsy?" Mercedes questioned comically.

"He _is_ a tall drink of water," Blaine joked to the delight of both Mercedes and Kurt. Rachel simply rolled her eyes, finally unhooking the bottle from her bag. She let much of her weight settle onto one leg, the other jutting out slightly as she stood with what she hoped passed for stern. It was likely pretty close, as she was upset enough about the delay to hide her excitement.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Rachel said, ignoring Kurt's muttered response as she spun around and left the room, heading left only to circle all the way around to get to the janitor's closet. She could feel her heart in her throat as she turned the knob, not knowing what to expect. She'd never been inside the room before, and certainly didn't imagine it would be pitch black. Somehow, though, she sensed Puck's whereabouts, finding herself enveloped in his arms almost the second after she locked the door.

"I'm so addin' this to the notebook."

The need in his voice hit her harder than the flat surface of the wall he'd pushed her against. She could feel how much he wanted her, and the evidence pressed against her stomach was just one of many. Her nervousness was immediately replaced with desire, her hands reaching up to clutch at his T-shirt the second she felt his lips on the sensitive skin of her neck.

"How do you want to do this?" He asked huskily, stopping himself from just ripping her underwear off and railing her until they both blacked out. She might have been the one to initiate the whole thing, and her hands were currently moving tantalizingly across the bare skin of his torso, but this was _still_ Rachel Berry. They didn't have all the time in the world before someone came looking for them, and she was just the type of person who always had a plan. "Fast and dirty?"

Rachel's eyes fluttered closed, her inhale sharp the second she felt Puck's tongue run over the outer shell of her ear, his teeth nipping softy at the lobe before he sucked in the tender flesh. A shiver ran through her body, ending with a curl of her toes. She bit her lip to keep herself from moaning, the action her last conscious thought. The rest was completely instinct. _Completely_ natural.

"I need you _now_."


End file.
